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Peko
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10 Jul 2010, 9:11 pm

For some reason while I was browsing the internet I came across this thing where a bunch of parents of autistic children were convinced their kids were more angelic/beautiful the NT ones... I've definitely heard of some people with ASD's looking younger than they are but I don't see what a person's looks have to do with whether or not they are on the spectrum?

p.s. Out of all the people I've met (including myself) who are on the spectrum I never perceived any of them as very pretty/(insert other word here).


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Chronos
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10 Jul 2010, 9:20 pm

Yes I have heard this. Personally I think it's a collimation of three phenomenas.

1. Parents always think their children are beautiful, even if the kid is ugly.
2. If parents perceive something is "wrong" with their kid, they mentally compensate for this by convincing themselves their child is super special.
3. NT's generally associate autism with mental retardation (like it or not they do) and mental retardation with undesirable negative outward physical appearances, and when they are presented with a conflict of this perception...a person who is autistic but looks normal, they are more inclined to interpret that normal look as above average looking.



Pistonhead
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10 Jul 2010, 9:20 pm

While I have seen some cute girls on this site and some guys who look fairly good I can't say there is an abnormal amount of beautiful physical traits (though I am happy that nobody portrays themself as being really trashy).

I actually look way older than I am. Some people have said late 40s for me.


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10 Jul 2010, 9:40 pm

Seems that people on the spectrum, because they are not reacting to the interpersonal body-language to the same degree that NTs do just seem more relaxed more of the time. Maybe this is what they are referring to, I know NTs sometimes just seem over-reactive and agitated to me. This also may relate to Botox, most people use their facial expressions to a degree that their faces wrinkle up then get injected with a paralytic toxin to smooth out the wrinkles; aspies and auties just don't do that naturally.


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10 Jul 2010, 11:12 pm

Chronos wrote:
Yes I have heard this. Personally I think it's a collimation of three phenomenas.

1. Parents always think their children are beautiful, even if the kid is ugly.
2. If parents perceive something is "wrong" with their kid, they mentally compensate for this by convincing themselves their child is super special.
3. NT's generally associate autism with mental retardation (like it or not they do) and mental retardation with undesirable negative outward physical appearances, and when they are presented with a conflict of this perception...a person who is autistic but looks normal, they are more inclined to interpret that normal look as above average looking.



This makes a lot of sense (i.e. that was a good explanation). I always wondered about the myth of the angelic looking autistic child came from.



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10 Jul 2010, 11:15 pm

*where the myth came from. :oops:



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11 Jul 2010, 1:23 am

There may be some common facial features among autistics; but if there are, they're subtle, and haven't been consistently defined by professionals yet (quite a few have made the attempt, though). I have heard of a lot of autistics who look younger than they actually are; this may or may not be connected. If there are common facial features, then they may be more stereotypically pretty, perhaps in childhood especially. Then again, NTs do find it difficult to divorce faces from facial expressions; and autistics do have different facial expressions--this could be responsible for the effect, rather than actual facial features.

Most of the autistic children of whom I have seen pictures are pretty children; but then, most children are beautiful anyway, just because they are children.


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TeaEarlGreyHot
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11 Jul 2010, 3:23 am

I always encountered the opposite... NT assuming Autistic people are ugly.


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Asp-Z
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11 Jul 2010, 3:31 am

I remember seeing another thread about this, and I'll say the same on this one as I (probably) said on that one: this 'theory' is utterly stupid.



Peko
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11 Jul 2010, 10:14 am

Chronos wrote:
Yes I have heard this. Personally I think it's a collimation of three phenomenas.

1. Parents always think their children are beautiful, even if the kid is ugly.
2. If parents perceive something is "wrong" with their kid, they mentally compensate for this by convincing themselves their child is super special.
3. NT's generally associate autism with mental retardation (like it or not they do) and mental retardation with undesirable negative outward physical appearances, and when they are presented with a conflict of this perception...a person who is autistic but looks normal, they are more inclined to interpret that normal look as above average looking.


Maybe I should tell my mom this cause she thinks I'm very pretty/attractive... :roll:


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11 Jul 2010, 10:32 am

Chronos wrote:
Yes I have heard this. Personally I think it's a collimation of three phenomenas.

1. Parents always think their children are beautiful, even if the kid is ugly.
2. If parents perceive something is "wrong" with their kid, they mentally compensate for this by convincing themselves their child is super special.
3. NT's generally associate autism with mental retardation (like it or not they do) and mental retardation with undesirable negative outward physical appearances, and when they are presented with a conflict of this perception...a person who is autistic but looks normal, they are more inclined to interpret that normal look as above average looking.


I think number 3 hits the spot. I bet some parents flap their hands to that.



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11 Jul 2010, 12:01 pm

I've always been told that I am gorgeous, but I don't think so. I think I'm ugly. I'm finding out recently that a lot of people feel this way about themselves, though. Everyone says I'm pretty, though. I dunno.

About the "looking younger" bit, I always get carded when I go into the liquor store. I'm 28 and I lost my ID and everyone insists that I am 15/16. LOL! What a pain in the butt! I just want my Hard Lemonade for crying out loud! :lol:


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11 Jul 2010, 1:07 pm

I think it's due to low self esteem in the parents.

They look in the mirror, look at their beautiful Autistic child, shrug their shoulders and say, "Huh! Must be the Autism!" :lol:


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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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11 Jul 2010, 2:04 pm

Well, it's better the parents think that than have a negative bias against their kid.



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11 Jul 2010, 8:27 pm

I've heard about this. The young thing applies to me. Probably one reason why the ladies don't fancy me! I still look so young for my age, I've wondered when I'll grow out of it and begin to look older than a teen.


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MrXxx
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12 Jul 2010, 11:13 am

You know, something just occurred to me. I was legal to buy alcohol in 1978. Last time I got carded was 1997 or so. Maybe (?) there could be something to this?

I kind of doubt it though. It would take a really long and comprehensive study to verify it by seeing how long Autistics continue to be carded.


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