Am I being taken advantaged of?

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Ok I'm probably not going to be very clear in this topic since I'm ignorant of the way disability services are done. But I just received a check from... (DHS? Social Security?) a few days ago titled (Dad's name) PER REP PAYEE FBO OF (my name) for a fairly large sum of money. Well, my dad has it pay to the order of to his name. Does that seem right? It sounds like he's taking the money for me and giving it to himself. But I don't know... Anyone smart can tell me what's up? Oh, and I live in Oregon.

You don't give your age. If you're still a minor, it would be sent to him as your representative guardian (REP PAYEE FBO - Representative Payee for Benefit Of), and he would be required to submit a monthly (or quarterly, I forget) report as to how the money was used on your behalf. That's standard procedure for Social Security Disability. Uncle Sam prefers not to send these payments directly to kids, lest the money be wasted on things other than basic survival.

If you're over 18, I don't know why his name would be involved at all.

I am over the age of 18. I still live with my parents and he handles all of the finance. Does that sound like a problem? Anyways, thanks for the reply

Whether it's a problem or not depends on a lot of factors we can't know. But it's really good to have it in your name, you can have that changed as long as you don't have a guardianship or anything. If it really needs to be him dealing with the finances, you can always get a joint bank account with him specifically for those checks. That way if you ever want to leave, it will be coming directly to you, and if he gives you trouble at that point you can just switch bank accounts on your own and have your checks sent there. If you are trying to leave and he's resisting and he's your representative payee, then that can give you trouble.

The only reason I don't have my mother as my representative payee is because in the long string of words that were happening, I heard about that, and made them back up and say what it was, and told them that I wanted to be paid directly to me, not to my mother. If I had not noticed (which would have been easy, it was two seconds worth of information and they just assumed she'd be my payee) then she would be my payee, and I would have had to change it later. I had it go to a joint bank account for both of us, then later I switched to my own bank account, which is why I know about that part and how easy it is if you're your own payee.

Yeah, that can definitely happen. Administrative 'efficiency,' they pigeon-hole you in some category or another.

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About having an advocate with you, which I very much recommend, a good advocate steers the conversation back to you. The financial official, or school official, or whoever, needs to be talking to you. I remember a friend telling me years ago that she took her senior citizen parent shopping for furniture, and the sales person directed the conversation to her the daughter and not to the parent actually buying it, not cool.

Okay, so what is the role of the advocate? Well, one, the advocate can later help you remember or write down what was said, and this can be highly beneficial if done right and done in a respectful fashion. And this is a reason why one spouse sometimes goes to the doctor with the other, even if neither have sensory issues. However, the prime purpose is this: the advocate, by their mere presence, helps to insure that the official is on their best game. The official is not going to try and slam-dunk you in one way or another, or going to dismiss your concerns in some fashion. The official is going to treat you (should treat you) with the same respect as any other person seeking services from the agency.

There are several details that I am missing in order to give you a good answer, but I work in human services in West Virginia and this is the best I can do with the information I have: What is happening is that your father is designated as payee for your checks. Since you are over eighteen this most probably would be because you have been judged not competent enough to manage your own finances. If you have a case worker or social worker assigned to you, then you can contact him/her and request that your payee be changed. Sometimes a state or charible agency (here it is Criss Cross) can be your payee and they would be trustworthy in handling your money, if you think your dad is stealing from you.

Now, if you want to receive your checks yourself in your own name, that is a lot stickier, as you would have to have your disability level changed and that's more difficult. Still, talk to a social worker about it and see what steps you can take.

That's the best I can do with the what you gave us.

If you are over 18, you are no longer considered a minor(if you committed an offence you would not be sent to juvie. Put it that way). You have every right to enquire into this situation. The only thing affecting your payments should be what your parents earn or you are severely disabled and are unable to sign your own name or spend your own money in an independent sense, in which case your parents would have power of attorney. Forms would have had to have been filled out for the Disability payment and you would have had to at some point sign these forms. Did you give your parents power to claim your benefits or act on your behalf?

Check this out with the DHS. It doesn't sound right to me.

Mics

Getting a representative payee is not always because you've been judged incompetent to handle your funds, in any formal sort of way. Sometimes it's just because they assumed you'd want one. That's what happened with me. When I requested it be changed to me, they changed it instantly. They just didn't know I wanted my own money given to me. They didn't even ask my mother if it was okay, it was just "oh, if you want it that way, then fine". So don't assume you've been judged incompetent unless someone with the SSA tells you you have.

Yeah, I'm kind of with anbuend. Just be matter-of-fact and ask and assume it's not going to be a be deal.

And try and give your Dad the benefit of the doubt. Probably a good idea at the time . . .

Kind of look at it that way. And now that you know more about these things, more interested in these kinds of things, probably time to at least look into doing things differently.

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So, assume your Dad's going to work with you. As a fall back position . . .

school . . .

a job you feel good about and is life enhancing . . .

maybe even a business you can start inexpensively and ramp up . . .

artistic projects of your own choosing . . .

intellectual projects of your own choosing . . .

groups that are fun and interesting in their own right and where there's an outside chance you might meet an interesting person (often works better that way) . . .

That is, even if things are going poorly in one area of your life, or you're facing a roadblock in one area, try not to let that hold you back in other areas. This is something I have learned through long experience.

Here. Take note. Helpful.

http://www.ssa.gov/payee/faqbene.htm

My mom was my payee when she first signed me up and I was 18 at the time and over.

I'm going to assume that you live with your father. If this is so, do you file your own taxes? Do you have a job? do you pay rent? do you make a substantial income? All of these details are crucial and missing. If you don't make a substantial enough income and don't pay rent (or pay rent but without an official lease) your father may be claiming you as a dependent adult on his taxes and this may be why he is getting cheques in your benefit. But I could be completely wrong, since I live in Canada and really only know how Canadian laws work.

i work as a property manager and deal with payee situations regularly. in my experience, its not just inability to manage finances but also inexperience in managing finances that has someone end up with a payee. parents are quite often the payee for their adult disabled children. i have currently about half a dozen tenants with payees, most have parent payees, one goes through a guardianship agency, and one has his brother as his payee (was previously his father whom he lived with but his father passed which is how he came to be a tenant of mine).

do keep in mind that while the money is yours, it is usually meant to cover your upkeep and expenses. that means its not just purely spending money, its also to help pay for your housing, utilities, and other costs of living. thats where the payee comes in. in most situations the payee uses that money to pay your rent, electric bill, phone bill, etc, and then the rest is available to you.

best thing would be to sit down with your parent(s) and talk it over. depending on their finances and personal beliefs, they may want or expect you to pay for some or all of your own upkeep even if you live with them.