Crazy Imagination and Self Defense

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This may be funny or stupid, but it's a true story.

Due to the fact that I am not very physically able, I am a potential target for bullies (fortunately, my private school is much more secure than Ukraine's public schools, but, stuff happens). One day when I was heavily depressed, I developed a new self defense technique: what I now call Sexual-Psychological Shock Fighting Technique. It's pretty simple: dodging kicks and punches, you attempt to hug your opponent and pretend to engage in sexual activity with them. Strangely enough, it worked: people would just jump away and call me a "f****** fa***t". Unfortunately, even long after I stopped using it people still think I'm gay.

Has anyone done weird stuff due to depression/crazy imagination?

LOL...I probably have...but at the moment I can't think of anything that would compare.

You might have gotten teased for this...but I give you an A+ for creativity...

I've often pretended to be gay to provoke my brother into fighting me. Works every time. Noone thinks I'm actually gay, though.

ive done somthing silimar. but not do anything sexual, just jump on them and sream in thier ears as loud as i can. no one has ever picked on me twice after i have done this to them. the other good one is biting.

I now do martial arts though so i would like to think i could hold my own.

jammie

When someone gets to me, I have been known to go berserk and just keep on punching, kicking, body-slaming, biting and screaming until someone bigger than me manages to pull me away.
I'm rather big, or at least stronger than normal, and I don't move very quickly, so that works better for me than any martial arts moves who pretty much require speed.

I knew someone who did something like that in 7th grade. There were a bunch of guys who like to tackle and wrestle with anyone smaller than them, but the best (and funniest) defence was to start sarcastically moaning like a porn star. The point was that it showed how gay the tacklers looked, and showed that the victim had a sense of humor. (A less funny way was just to shout "Rape! Rape!")

Of course, these tactic would be of no use in a fist-fight.

I am good as at kicks and stuff

I can kick 8'1 ft and im only 5'11 ft high. I love doing ceiling height kicks I think they look mean as. Being physically able never stopped me from getting bullied in school. Not even defending my self it only got me expelled from schools even when they started it. Just because of "excessive force" tossers.