Getting old and dying with AS .

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It looks like I'll have to think about that ~ Some months ago , a doctor was somewhat doomy about " you may have less than a year to live " , though medico/s did back away from that later when my condition improved -, I spoke about this then you will recall .
Mostly , my body is so bad that the thought that it will give out occurs to me .
At this point , " the medical-industrial complex " could probably keep me alive a bit longer for a liusy life , and congratulate themselves for doing it .
I ran into the latest attempt to get me into a board & care home ~ Presumably with all my money to be sucked away , and I'll NEVER HAVE ANYTHING ! , NEVER GO ANYWHERE ! and just be woken up every day for my daily basket weaving class .
A part of me wishes to go back to something the nice , green suburb I grew up in , as if wanting the status I had then ~ Perhaps I could be the crankly old eccentric who lives on the edge of down and does people's handywork , a lot o-f us were probably like that .

...part of me was rather thinking of trying to be " adopted " , more or less , by some church congregation...Not to be a total charity case , be a congregant , who contributes to his reasonable ability8means . I don't quite see how it's supposed to happen .

Maybe that is the best thing. To have a permanent residence and have someone looking after you every day. If that means you don't have much money left to do things with, well there are ways of using public transport for free (as I've explained in another thread) or getting clothes heavily discounted at charity shops, etc. It's something to think about. Having money but living in a shelter or homeless... or not having as much money and having a permanent residence where you're cared for.

I agree with Tobes.

As for all your money being sucked away ... Did you ever get a new ATM card?

...To-day , Thurs. - my card has not come , and a person in San Francisco who , accoording to a WP friend from elsewhere of mine , in conversations we had elsewhere , was going , according to the WP friend , show up at7 my address this morning ~ did not .

...I am even banned from the library here (all o-f them) here in SF , remember , so... .

Having money is overrated. Seriously. The vast bulk of the money we earn over our lifetime is squandered on things that we never needed anyway. As for the rest..... you have things like the house and the car, things that are also worthless to us in the end.

The most valuable things people look back on when they're laying on their death bed had nothing to do with anything money ever bought.

..." Money isn't everything/unless you ain't got dough ! " ~ Rogers & Hammerstein .
You do need some minimums for some things ...........

Sorry, I have no idea who they even are.

If it were up to me, i'd crush the monitory system and just give everybody what they needed, not what they wanted. But my view doesn't go down well in the western world.

I'm sorry you've been going through such a tough time in your life. I'm not going to say that I can relate to your situation, because I honestly can't. What I would say though is this. As long as you have air in your lungs, you've got to make the most of it. We're all living on limited time and any time spent worrying about what's next is time wasted. I know it's not easy, but try just living for the moment and don't get caught up on how the future is going to play out. Life is far too unpredictable for that.

...Your great-Grand-Mum would NOT ! !! !! !! be very happy with that...Why , I think she'd pull your ear

Sorry, I have no idea who they even are.











If it were up to me, i'd crush the monitory system and just give everybody what they needed, not what they wanted. But my view doesn't go down well in the western world.

I'm sorry you've been going through such a tough time in your life. I'm not going to say that I can relate to your situation, because I honestly can't. What I would say though is this. As long as you have air in your lungs, you've got to make the most of it. We're all living on limited time and any time spent worrying about what's next is time wasted. I know it's not easy, but try just living for the moment and don't get caught up on how the future is going to play out. Life is far too unpredictable for that.[/quote]

Not so sure about that. She's as mad as I am.

Why?

Was the coughing a problem?

Literally the only reason I can think to get banned from a library is look at porn so high five if you found another way.

I have been an social outcast for as long as I can remember. Last year I got into a huge depression. I stopped going to school and played videogames all day. I also suffered from a masturbation addiction, which filled me with guilt. Nobody understood me and I still feel people don't really understand the way I think. My own parents gave up on me, and considered if things wouldn't work out soon to put my in a day setting. Psychologist didn't help either, I'd make me feel happy for a short period. But I'd still feel miserable nonetheless. What is the point of life, no matter the things you do. We all have the same destination. If you are rich and happy don't you lose much more when you die.

After many nights of crying myself to sleep. I had one night that I can hardly describe with words, surreal. The moment I woke up I felt a rushing wind hurling around in the inside of my body, with an insane feeling of rest and joy. I felt energy I felt love, love like I've never felt before. It makes me want to dance it makes me want to cry. And above all I was thirsting for seeking God. I saw my dad sitting in the living room, asked him about a bible study I previously didn't show any interest towards whatsoever. And the first page I turn I learn about the love of God and the second page describes almost exactly the same thing I felt during that morning. And page after page after page, and I thought to myself how did all this pass me by I understand now.

The thing I missed all my life I have found, the thing above things the thing that people thirst for was right in front of me all this time. The thing people look for at the wrong places. And this thing you need and we all need is Jesus Christ, not long after that day I got baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. And I can now call myself a Son of God. Heaven my destination and life with a purpose. Did I tell you life without God has no purpose? For I didn't choose God he chose me. Since I didn't seek Him he seeked me. Now my friend take my word for it you need Jesus Christ and you need him now. So tell me your name and let us pray for you to be a son of God like me.

Last edited by Yo El on 30 Dec 2016, 5:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Maybe, it's possible to have some of the things, you used to like.

I'm not a religious person at all.

But if faith in Jesus can help ASS-P somehow, I'd be all for it.