Why do NT's want you to go places with them?

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Even if it's a 5 minutes trip to the store, I don't see the reason to bring someone with them to the store. And do they feel bad if you don't go? I think they may feel rejected if you don't go.

They think you are shutting yourself away from everybody and they think they are helping you. When you are not around they will tell their other friends what they are doing so they will look like some kind of saint. I had a friend like this in highschool he took me everywhere and tried to explain things to me I already knew and understood. He also got me a job in a resteraunt when he heard me bitching no one would hire me. It turned out the to be worst job I ever had I was stuck there for nine years because no one else would hire me and I needed the cash. I spent 91-2000 in a living hell because of his help.

I have known some people who fear to be alone and behaved the way you describe. I think they need a constant stimulation by being with someone. I think when they are alone they start to be scared and sad. They feel disappointed if you don't go, but they realize they are asking too much sometimes (like the shop trip).

They had two other strong traits:
- Their image was very important to them
- They had lost someone (close parent death, parent divorce)
- They were lying easily (for details, they were not traitors though)
- In the very long term they can be disappointed and slowly reject you and only if they find someone that suits them better

liveandletdie, can you confirm some of these points?

wow you just explained a whole part of my life to me. i just thought i had really needy friends........

I noticed when I told co-workers I live in walking distance to a movie theater and go there alone a lot. When I told them this some of them said give me a call I'll go with you. No one should have to go to the theater alone, you know you look like a looser when you go by yourself. They were more upset with this then they were when I told them I slipped on the ice almost making me fall into traffic.

LOL at "noone should have to go to the theater by themselves".....do they understand the plot better if someone is there to explain it to them? not a lot of talking going on in a theater anyway.......

One of my NT friends has to stay in relationships because he hates being alone. And then people give me weirs looks and pity me because I go to the cinema and gigs on my own. Surely his behavior is more... unhealthy (kinda struggling for the right adjective here). But yeah, I find a lot if NTs need you to go somewhere with me. I much prefer going on my own. Anyone here prefer to go for meals on their own too?

A trip to the store is just ret*d unless you like live next door. Now if you were talking about going to the movies I'd say what's wrong with YOU. The obvious answer is aspergers.

I myself love to experience new things or old things with new people if only to study their reactions.

From what my mom has told me, some people are afraid to be alone, some are afraid to go alone. So they want someone to come with them.


I still don't understand either. I don't mind being alone and I am sure not afraid to go alone. There had been a few times in my life where I wish I had someone with me so I can share the fun with them. This was back when I was single. Perhaps that's why people want someone to go with them? But to go to the store?

Now I have my husband but I still do stuff alone because he also doesn't like people and crowds so it's ironic. I don't mind. He will come if I want him to but I don't like forcing him in situations he doesn't like because I wouldn't like it being done to me. But if he chooses to come, I don't have to be obligated to do it back to him. But I don't go out much anyway.

I used to get these comments at work about me going alone or doing stuff alone and I couldn't understand why the big deal and that's when mom told me.

My sister in law has also asked if anyone wants to go to the store with her and she wanted someone to go with her. She tried to get me to come but I didn't want to go, I was in a bad mood anyway. I forget when this was and why I was in a bad mood. This was a couple years ago.

Because NTs can't just go somewhere quickly without socialising the whole time, that's madness!

also fyi...this is my brother

i think another element to this could be...atleast in the case of my family

they have not left the house all day and want to take as much advantage of the possibility of leaving the house as they can.

so, to them with the opportunity to bring someone with them this could make the small window of opportunity more enjoyable.

Though my brother is one of the few people I love to spend time with, I would still prefer he not go when I go on my adventures or outings (though I prefer adventures)

Can anyone relate?

My dad would often ask me if I would like to go to the hardware store, though I do enjoy the hardware store because of the smells and different textures I would pretty much never go unless he made me, because the times I would enjoy being there would be when my brother would go then I could feel comfortable in the hardware store.

Hmm..well..this reminded me of some things in child hood, which is good as I have been trying to remember childhood.

If they're wanting to tag along when YOU go somewhere, one should be suspicious. They might not think you're capable of going out alone.

It's because they really do like us and they enjoy our company.

good answer =)

just trying to currently become more able to figure out how other people think..

When I was in high school, there was this girl who might have been an aspie now that I look back. When we took a field trip, the teacher asked some of the girls in the class to watch her and make sure she didn't wander off. (And no, he had no cause to believe she would, other than the fact that she was "weird")
The girls approached her under the guise of being friendly, but they were really just doing what the teacher asked them. However, if asked, they could have easily used that excuse about how people shouldn't be alone.
BTW, the field trip was to a local supermarket. Not a labyrinth, but a supermarket!
When there's a condition, disorder, disease, or injury involved; one always has to make sure others aren't trying to treat them like a child.

I very much enjoy going all sorts of places alone. Most of the time, it's a hassle to have another person along. Often, if a roommate insists on tagging along, I will listen to my iPod anyway.

That said . . . sometimes I go to unusual situations that confuse me, and it is actually beneficial for me to have somebody with me to help decipher what is going on.