'normal' people in mode of all-sending, no-receiving.

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AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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07 Nov 2010, 9:34 pm

This morning on C-Span "Book TV," an author answered a question and then beamed. Or smiled embarrassedly, depending on how you look at it.

And also this morning, at my job at the department store, during the morning 'huddle' and rah-rah meeting, the loss prevention lady, at the invitation of the manager leading the meeting, made some brief remarks, and she also beamed.

This is an Aspie communication pattern! Except it's not only an Aspie pattern, apparently it's a very human communication pattern. Perhaps any strong emotion. Little surprised about the author giving the talk. Well, maybe she's primarily an author and not that experienced a public speaker.



Chronos
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07 Nov 2010, 11:47 pm

What if you don't want to do the morning huddle/company cheer thing?



bee33
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08 Nov 2010, 10:11 am

I'm not sure if I understand what you mean by "beamed?"



Bluefins
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08 Nov 2010, 11:19 am

bee33 wrote:
I'm not sure if I understand what you mean by "beamed?"

Image

:D Nah, it's a kind of smile. I'm not sure what the OP means with Aspie communication pattern, though.



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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08 Nov 2010, 12:08 pm

Chronos wrote:
What if you don't want to do the morning huddle/company cheer thing?

It's mainly preaching at you. I guess you are expected to politely applaud when they announce the awards for highest sales volume and the most credit card applications.

Now, most of the people present were visibly tired. I was kind of amazed at that part, but that does provide a social cover if one simply does not wish to participate. (And yes, I think participation such as applauding should be voluntary. And to further add to the social layers, the manager on duty that morning did much of it kind of tongue-in-cheek. He kind of knew people weren't crazy to be there.)



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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08 Nov 2010, 12:15 pm

Here's a picture of Gordon Brown beaming. In this case, the glass is almost a metaphor. If a colleague was sitting next to him in the car and said something, Gordo may not hear it, or it may not register.

Now, as a seasoned politician, Gordon is probably an excellent listener and an excellent reader of people, but in the basking frame of mind, he's not.

http://alyahya.blogspot.com/2010/05/lab ... clegg.html
(6th picture down)



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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08 Nov 2010, 12:23 pm

Here's a picture of Kate Hudson beaming
http://moviemania77.blogspot.com/2010/0 ... on-in.html
(first picture down--the picture of her in the awards gown next to the 'Almost Famous' poster)

If a friend was standing next to her and said something, it might not register. And that's okay. One thing, we should cut others some slack when they're in the all-sending, no-receiving frame of mind, and we should cut ourselves some slack, too.



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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08 Nov 2010, 12:31 pm

Bluefins wrote:
. . . I'm not sure what the OP means with Aspie communication pattern, though.
For me, it often means talking in paragraphs and focusing so much on what I'm sending that I'm missing what the other person is saying/experiencing/communicating even if later in retrospect it's patently obvious.

(So, I guess the solution is, paradoxically, don't try so hard!)



Michael_Stuart
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08 Nov 2010, 2:14 pm

Well, I think you have a point. However, what people (even medical professionals) often forget is that for it to count as a symptom of a disorder, it has to be problematic in nature. The idea is that while this is a normal faux pas, it is supposedly unusually common in aspies. When people lose sight of that, you get incorrect diagnoses and a lot of wasted time 'n' money.



Philologos
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08 Nov 2010, 4:01 pm

One very large component of society has what is to me an annoying habit of smiling a particular smile after making a point [I normally look serious].

In large doses, it makes graduate students feel they are first day kindergarteners.

I find it insulting, but it is just the way Enneagram 1s are wired.

Check the smile - tentative, triumphant, or "aren;t you glad I enlightened you, kiddies?"



alexptrans
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08 Nov 2010, 4:06 pm

I still don't know what this thread is about. :(



Marcia
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08 Nov 2010, 4:25 pm

I don't understand what this thread is about either. Some people speak then smile? :?