Aspie or Just a Nerd

Post Reply New Topic

Hello, this is my first post here. You've probably seen it a million times: I think I have Asperger's and I have some questions. I have a pretty basic one to start. What do you believe distinguishes a smart, gifted, bullied aspie vs. a smart, gifted, bullied NT nerd?

Apologies in advance if there's already a thread for this, but I could not find one.

a smart Nt would have to be extremely ugly to be bullied are you ugly? if you are not offended by this question, problem solved, you're an aspie.
( i'm just kidding btw, maybe someone has more thoughts than i do , i'm tired. )

sensory overload, inability to read and understand social cues, motor control issues, clumsly, stiming, and a few other issues would be the differences.

I'm not offended by the ugly question. I consider myself average, though my wife disagrees and thinks that I'm hot.

Well of course people with AS learn social cues. You'd never survive outside your house if you didn't. It just takes us longer, because we don't pick them up unconsciously like most people do. We tend to gradually become aware by watching trends (statistical behaviors, not fads). When we try something repeatedly and it doesn't work, we start watching other people and see what they do that does work. That doesn't mean we're ever as good at these things as those who are born with the ability to just pick them up without even thinking about it, but we figure out how to muddle our way through most day to day situations (or how to avoid those situations we can't handle).

On the other hand, some things are lifelong problems. If you have serious issues with social anxiety, that's probably going to be a problem for you your whole life. I was talking to a Mental Health professional the other day about talking to strangers and she was focusing on the textbook concepts of not picking up nonverbal cues and I told her that I don't have such a problem with that as an adult, I pretty much know by now what to watch for.

My problem now is I don't know how to begin an interaction with a stranger because to me the possible opening remarks are so seemingly infinite, I don't know which one to choose. If they approach me and ask a question, or make a remark, problem solved, now I have a handle on what to talk about. Now maybe there are some nonverbal cues there I'm missing, but I have the same problem ordering in a restaurant, there are too many choices and I'm overwhelmed by my inability to know which one of several seemingly equal but different things to pick. That's a processing problem and it seems to be pretty common to autistic people.

I don't know what an NT nerd is like.

Can they small talk or do they talk more about their special interests?

To that have oversensitivity to light/sound/touch/smell?

Do they have any motor skill problems?

Do they spend all day on their special interest, forget to eat and lose sleep because of it?

Can they adjust well to change?

Do they have repetitive rituals? Wear the same clothes, eat the same food, do the same thing everyday, etc.

Do they need step by step instructions to learn a new skill? Usually it's something that is physical.

Can they regulate their emotions or are they quick to anger?

Are they immature emotionally to that of their peers?

Do they write lists and talk like an instruction manual?

Is their name Sheldon? I thought I'd add that last one in.


Interesting about the whole social cues vs. math thing. I always do math re-vision but I haven't got the memory for it. It just slips out of my mind and so I have to re-learn it again. It's the same with me and social cues. I did learn some things but when I'm actually around people I completely forget about what I learnt.

I will try to compare the list of pensieve with the nerd stereotype usually presented with TV, movies, etc.

Repeated post

Hope it can help.

http://www.davidsongifted.org/db/Articles_id_10167.aspx

Actually I do know an NT nerd. He has a knowledge about most things. He's a programmer, plays bass, rides bikes (big bike obsession) and a bit political.
He's very social but. And I think he can balance his work, interests and social life well. His jokes sometimes go over other peoples heads.

I also might just add: wouldn't some nerds stereotyped in the media be based on people with AS before it was a well known condition?

how about sensory overload, social disability, but not a motoric clumsiness, b'cause my motoric movement is just fine.

Actually a nerd is what you call really smart people. A geek is the one with a lot knowledge about a certain interest and a dork is the one who lacks social skills.
When you call someone a nerd you are just implying that they are very very smart. That's my understanding at least. I get called a nerd more about what I speak about and not when I show bad social skills.
My friend is definitely a nerd but he's a cool one because of his knowledge in music. The guy pretty much knows everything, it can get frustrating.