unable to modulate my emotions

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Does anyone struggle with emotions that are completely overwhelming and impossible to bear, VS, feeling almost nothing? This happens to me particularly in the context of my obsessions, my emotions will reach "tidal wave" strength and I feel like a computer freezing up and crashing. Then, somehow, if I manage to take a few steps back, I go to "flat" emotions. It seems like I very rarely feel moderate, steady, tolerable emotions. And when I do feel "tidal wave" emotions I'm sometimes not even sure WHAT I'm feeling (happy? grief? jealousy? joy? I have no clue) beyond sometimes being to tell if it's a good emotion or a bad emotions. Even sometimes when I think it's a good emotion it will suddenly feel bad and vice versa. I also struggle with very small things having way too strong an effect on me, making me way too emotional and overwhelmed. It's like my whole "moderation capacity" is totally non-functional.

This has led some some extremely embarrassing and immature-looking behavior on my part that leaves me really ashamed and wanting to give up on social interaction.

I used to be like that when i was younger. now that i'm older, i get into some bad moods everyonce in awile but they seem to go away alot quicker, or take care of themselves.

you're enviroment also plays a big role in your emotions, if i was back living with my mom i'd be so much more stressed out, and angry all the time

I have a really hard time modulating emotions as well. I usually get really upset/ect. for some reason, and act irrationally, then feel absolutely horrible, and apologize for my actions.

I also have a really hard time modulating emotions.

What I don't have a hard time modulating is 'paragraphs'.

I can go for days and days and just keep making paragraphs.

er...

The system crash, that happens to me if I am emotionly overloaded with the situation and don't take it back a notch.
Taking back a notch results in decreased empathy and less social flexibility (becoming more autistic).

It happens to me if I am tired, in possible danger or emotional overload.

That describes it well-- it's like I have a total shutdown to the outside world.

My emotions nearly destroyed me. I've also done some pretty crazy and embarrassing things on account of my fits. Its hard to describe the feeling, but "tidal wave" sounds close. My threshold for stress of any kind was exceedingly low. It isolated me from everyone, my family included, and I just kept getting stuck in the same rut...over and over and over. I finally went to see a doctor...and what a difference! Not saying things are perfect, but its made me functional. I'm able to do things now that I never could have done before (like college). So...what I'm saying is...if you have the resources, go and see a psychiatrist. It sounds like it could really benefit you.

Better living through chemistry!

We are many, it isn't strange now .

If you experience it just like I do, just before it happens I feel pretty tired (heavy eyelids, throbbing forehead, less patience -wanting to wrap it up, quickly agitated).

In short: I-don't-give-a-shit mode
Looking annoyed, tired, angry, glassy eyes, slouching walk aren't exceptions.

I hope this helped.

Cheerfully,
Wallourdes

Yes, and it is so embarrassing! Today, I went for a walk on a nature trail with my boyfriend. I was dismayed to see that there were lots of people out walking. Couples on cell phones, loud gossiping groups of women, shrieking kids plummeting through the undergrowth and talking loudly. I could feel the tension filling my body. When we stopped to view a deer, other people stopped too, clicking cameras and standing too close. We had to walk until we'd left the crowd behind, and I ended up in tears. I know people were staring...

^ this