Any NTs here to give me social pointers?

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I need help badly to socialize, I'm struggling badly with understanding people, it doesnt help that I really have issues with eye contact, lately it's like my personality is blank...

Have you read any books on body language? If you want to socialize, you'll have to empathize to some degree, or at least have an understanding of how others might feel about what you say and how you act. It might or might not take a bit of effort to do, but think about if you were them, and how you would feel if they said what you were going to say to them.

Also, observe and learn what other people do when they engage in small talk, do your best to NOT talk about any obsessions you might have and not dominate the conversation - try and keep it 50/50 with you and the person you're talking to. In order to achieve this balance, try and pay attention to when they seem to want to talk about something about themselves, e.g. if they say 'oh yeah, that reminds me, yesterday I went to the mall and met up with some friends', then ask them a few relevant questions (don't fake interest, just be casual unless you're really interested) and give a few comments. Or if you start talking about one of your interests and it's going alright, ask them about what they're interested in.

If they seem bored, change the topic to something they might've brought up earlier or say something like 'Anyway, I gotta go, nice talking to you'. The key is being spontaneous and treating it casually just like anything else. Hope this helps, but if I haven't done anything then please tell me what specific problems you're having

Socially capable Autie here.

You have:
1. Issues with eye contact
2. You think your personality is blank

Step into my office

Tell me more please.

A saying for guys is "Always leave them wanting more" as far as picking up girls. This is just a fratified way of saying "End the conversation on a good note" which applies to anyone in a conversation, especially to the person who started the conversation. The more you worry about being socially perfect, the less you will be. Kinda like the nervous guy on the tightrope. The most convincing sale is one with an alluring hook and a strong finish. Writing an essay, winning a boxing round, doing a 5 minute open mic at a comedy club, holding a conversation, it's all the same formula: Start strong, finish stronger. All that other stuff you say doesn't matter as much as people think it does.

maybe look into any social skills classes that might be available in your area or group meeting type things where you can practice socializing in a more controlled setting. i send my daughter who is 11 to social skills classes through a local counselling agency. she has done classes on body language, the dynamics of holding a conversation where she learned the 'rules' of conversation, things like not interupting(or knowing when you won't be interuputing0 and asking questions related to the topic, waiting your turn to speak, how to change the subject gracefully, ect. there was one class on manners, one on meeting new people. i forget what they all were but i find she is using the skills because she is much easier to talk to now. she actually listens to what i'm telling her, and doesn't interupt(as much). i can't tell if it's helping her out at school because she has pretty much segregated herself from the other kids, eats in the office, spends recess in the library, sits away from everyone... wish i had found these classes earlier.