15 Jan 2011, 9:52 pm
~~~ COME TO CAMP BURNOUT! ~~~
Come to Camp Burnout! Come for the relaxation; stay because you can't stand up (or stand up without passing out)!
Watch great movies in our iMax theatre. We actually only have one movie, but you won't be able to remember that, so enjoy!
Too tired or can't remember how to speak? That's ok, most here are too tired to make sense of what others are saying. All of our staff are fluent in ASL, pantomine, cerades, writing, and are certified psychic mind-readers. You need something? -- I already knew that. Our staff are all also diagnosed with "pathological demand fufillment" syndrome. Your wish is their command, literally. (You may order them to rest, take time off, or otherwise free themselves if guilt or discomfort ensues.)
Autopilot speech a problem? Just wear the label included with your reservation confirmation, with the yellow & green "ignore my speech" side showing. Then, turn on your complimentary BlueTooth v9.0 transmitter to transmit your thoughts directly to our BlueTooth-enabled staff.
Bored, but can't move a muscle? Our "stim attendants" will bring the finest in visual, tactile, and otherwise stim toys in the world, and spin them in front of your eyeball of choice. You may also ask to be gently wafted with a palm frond. Bringing pets is welcomed and encouraged. Pets may also request being wafted with a palm frond.
Always forget why you walked into a room? At Camp Burnout this is not a problem, as every room has all the functions of every other room. Want to go to the kitchen? You're already there! Want to watch a movie, or go to the bathroom? Again, you're already there!
Camp Burnout! Come for the relaxation, stay because you can't get up!
Verdandi
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15 Jan 2011, 9:57 pm
Tollorin
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15 Jan 2011, 10:17 pm
I can't decide if it's heaven or hell. 
Titangeek
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Joined: 22 Aug 2010
Age: 31
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Location: somewhere in the vicinity of betelgeuse
15 Jan 2011, 11:12 pm
this intrigues me... 
15 Jan 2011, 11:19 pm
I'd like to talk to some of those mind readers
16 Jan 2011, 1:01 am
I like. Sign me up. Pretty please?
16 Jan 2011, 1:25 am
