Talking to a pediatrician about AS

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I just had a conversation with my sister about AS. She is a pediatrician, and, by all reports, is a good one. I just wanted a reference to a psychologist who specialized in ASD. What I got was a frustrating conversation which makes me doubtful that I will ever find someone qualified.

She said that I did not have AS because I was able to hold a conversation. She said that her patients with AS could not hold a conversation. Also, she noted that I was a happy child, when I was very young; I was advanced for my age; and I had a good relationship with my grandmother. I pointed out that AS is a spectrum and that it sounded to me like her patients were low functioning, but that things were quite different for high functioning individuals. She wouldn't hear about it, and just told me to keep on trying harder to fit in. She wouldn't accept the notion that some people just have a more difficult time fitting in.

Anyway, this whole conversation makes me think that the milder forms of AS are rarely diagnosed in this area. This is extremely frustrating for me.

Is she a developmental pediatrician? Only certain types of doctors are actually qualified to give a diagnosis. Many doctors i've found (even in the psychological field) are hesitant to give an autism diagnosis. Also it can present a little differently in adults, and different sexes. After all she is a pediatrician which is a childrens doctor.

One problem may be that she knows you well and sees you at your most comfortable. She's not aware of your behavior the other 99% of the time and may not remember the details of your youth clearly.

One thing I found when discussing it with a family member was how little they knew about me. They were surprised by many of the details I shared.

No, she is not a developmental pediatrician, but I wasn't looking for a diagnosis from her, just advice on finding a qualified psychologist. She is five years older than me, so she is able to judge my childhood behavior. The frustrating thing was that she wouldn't give me a reference, because she was so certain that I did not have AS.

That would make sense. Sounds a little bit about how my family(except for my mother) was.

5 years is not really old enough to judge your childhood. Especially considering she didn't get her training until she was an adult AND she likely only knew you as a sister and not an outside observer.

Good point. I think that the problem is first, all of her AS patients (that she knows about) have severe cases of AS, so she thinks that everyone with AS is like that; second, as you pointed out, she sees me at my best; and third, she is in denial about how bad things are for me.

True enough. Also, when she went through med school, AS was not an actual diagnosis, so she probably has limited training in that area. All she knows is that I was quite different from her patients who have AS, but the patients that she described were quite severe cases: unable to hold a conversation at all, unable to bond to relatives at all.

I would suggest you print out AS information from a credible source and circle all the things you did as a child in red and all the things you have trouble with now as an adult in another color.

She needs to understand that an AS adult is very different from an AS child... and that Autism is not the same for everyone.

One thing you need to understand is that there aren't many resources in the US to diagnose adults. The US is very behind when it comes to understanding Autism, so if you pursue a diagnosis it could be a long hard road even after your sister is on board with you.

I think that approach would be fruitless. My sister has never changed her mind in the 49 years that I have known her. This is not hyperbole. I literally cannot recall her ever changing her mind about even the most trivial thing. People who say that Aspies are stubborn have never met my sister.



Yes, the more I try, the more aware I become of this. I think that I will abandon my sister as a lost cause. I'll work on my psychiatrist instead. At least he admitted the possibility that I was right.

If your psychiatrist is already on board, then you don't need a recommendation from your sister. I have my doubts a recommendation from a pediatrician would have done much good anyway.

i.m.o., doctors are idiots!
The problem with pcp, pediatricians, etc. is that they are trained in a very broad range of topics, therefore have very limited knowledge in the precise areas of the subjects such as autism. They only know key features. But they think they know everything!

You, if you suspect, need to see a specialist. A person can fit the 'social' norm and still fall on the spectrum.

The curse of being high-functioning is that it's harder for even a qualified professional to recognize the disorder.

Her patients are young. Conversational skills often increase with age. There are some autistics that are completely non verbal that start conversing.



Your sister may be too close to the situation. She knows you too well. She compares you to children she sees for 15 minutes once or twice each year. Not a valid comparison, IMHO.



Where is "this area"? Are there any autistic organizations around? I got a referral through one of those.

I was just hoping that she knew someone that I could talk to, or even just someone who could tell me who to talk to. My psychiatrist isn't really on board. He mostly wants to explore my reasons for wanting a diagnosis, but he isn't completely opposed to the idea.



My problem is in finding an appropriate specialist. Many so-called specialists only treat children or the severely disabled.



Sad, but true.

[quote"wavefreak58"]Her patients are young. Conversational skills often increase with age. There are some autistics that are completely non verbal that start conversing. [/quote]

That is one of the problems. When I was young, I had no difficulties with conversation skills. In fact, I was very advanced for my age in verbal skills. That is a bit unusual, but not unknown. ASD is such a strange beast.



This area is Honolulu, Hawaii. My sister actually practices on Maui, but this is a small state, and everybody knows everybody. We are not at the forefront of psychiatric care. I am trying to find some sort of organization that would be helpful. I have yet to find an organization that deals with high-functioning adults.