Do aspie adults have a difficulty in "growing up"?

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I can't seem to grow up at all. I change majors every semester at college, which led me to flunk it. Went to a tech school where they promised you a job upon graduation. I knew this would be a bigger benefit, because once you choose a major, you are locked into it until you graduate. There's no english classes, no psychology, just every class that relates to your career choice.

Thing is, at age 21, I can't seem to learn how to grow up and be the adult. The majority of people my age, already have a bachelor's degree by now, and I can't seem to get an associate's. I know the only way of getting a good job is getting to college, getting a good education, and flaunting your degree at employers, but I can't seem to grasp it.

My mom is pressuring me to drive, but I'm terrified at being behind the wheel. I can't focus to save my ass, and she knows it. If I ever get a car, who's paying for the insurance? How am I going to handle the liability of possibly killing someone in a car accident? I can't get a job, because I don't know how to keep one. I wanted to wait to get out of school anyway to find a job.

I want to live on my own, but don't know how. My parents think I just don't care, but in truth, I'm helpless right now. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to act and live like an adult. A part of me is terrified. I really want to prepare for adult life, but I just don't know how.

I had an undecided major too. I feared committing myself to one subject. What I wanted was to major in literature but I realized there was no future in that. I also liked art but that was another example of a major that might not mean gainful employment after graduation. I felt torn between following my desires or working on practical matters.
I would have gotten finished a lot sooner by sticking to one course of action and not taking any extra classes, which are expensive, too.

I've put so much time and energy into this "growing up" thing that I think I ended up crashing and burning, and ended up behind where I was when I was 21. I don't feel particularly "grown up," despite being in my early 40s, and I still feel like I'm lacking skills I need to live independently. I know I changed my college major three times (once for each additional attempt at college), but my college attempts were years apart.

I'm not sure precisely how I missed these things, but they're not really there. I definitely don't feel my age.

I know how you feel, and I don't really know what to tell you.

I'm 24, but most days I feel like I'm about 4-5... I've never really grown up, I've tried, it just hasn't worked out. I'm unemployed and about to have to move back in with my parents, again. This was my second time trying to move out on my own, both times it's gone disastrously. Most people that I have known that are my age are engaged/married, done or almost done with school, and, for the most part, doing well for themselves. I can't even seem to get my laundry done unless my sister comes over and goes with my to the laundromat.... forget thriving on my own, I'm barely surviving.

Would you say that you have, oh, I don't know, a developmental problem?

A pervasive one, even?

Well, to a point, I have grown up. I hold a job atm and live in a foreign country. However, I still feel like a child at heart: I still have loads of plushies, have a bad impulse control and even speak in a rather childish way...

People are constantly surprised when I tell them how old I am. Although I feel more settled in myself as I have gotten (physically) older, I feel like I am and will always feel the same young age. I don't believe that I will ever change and to be honest after years of feeling like I had to try to live up to what others my age were doing, I just don't care anymore. I will always be different.

I live alone but every day there is a moment in the day when I have this feeling inside that my parents went off and didn't realize I was here alone.

nervous reaction

I shake it off and keep up the facade I'm tall and drive and work. But whenever I have lived with someone at some point they get frustrated with me and call me a 6 year old. It is embarrassing and it also feels flipped.
When I was 6 years old I felt as old as my parents. I understood everything they talked about. I couldn't understand why I couldn't share my opinion on politics or whatever when they were gathered with other adults. I felt old when I was young and then at 21 I felt 18...and keep feeling younger.

I feel alot like this too ... I am 21 but don't/ too scared to drive, I often act like a teen still around the age of 15 to 16 and there is no way I would be able to live on my own (still at home).

Do you think it's a possibility for some Aspie adults to fall behind when it comes to growing up?

I do have difficulty in growing up. I couldn't pick a major either. I always saw what other people were doing and got jealous. I wanted all the possibilities without having to make one choice and stick to it. Doing one thing forever is just boring to me.

Also to be honest I don't think I ever got over the fact that kids stopped "playing" at a certain point and became teenagers and started "hanging out" and now in the mid-twenties it's even more formal sometimes.

I always wondered how people my age knew how to progress to the next stage. They didn't think twice about it it seemed, it just came naturally. I honestly am still stuck at the point where girls and boys called each other gross and wouldn't play together and don't understand when that became (for the most part, since most of the world is heterosexual) girls and boys not being able to keep away from each other and being loving and all that.

I mean of course I understand, I just don't see the transitions I guess, ever. It shocked and bewildered me when people started getting jobs, drinking, getting girlfriends/boyfriends, progressing through college and graduating, getting their own apartments, getting into serious relationships, getting engaged, having kids now. The gaps between each stage seem infinite.

I'll always feel 10 I think.

I'm exactly where I was, when I was 21. I'm 36. I've never taken any masters in college, I still don't drive and I don't have a family, nor am I interested in sex. Most adults have a stiff upper lip and they can hold themselves together. I cry when I'm really upset about something. I still don't wish to be cured of my autism.

An adult is a degenerated child, IMHO.

I still feel around 14. I react to people in shops etc as though they're grown-ups and I have to keep reminding myself that I'm probably at least thirty years older then they are and that's how I look to them.