Going to gathering/party

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I don't know what to do I have so many options. Not talk unless spoken too. Play my Ipod/DS) I've been at cookouts at my sister Erica's house before with just regular family but this will be a little more than that. Thanfully I know Rusty (her husband Bday guy) his friends will socialize in the backyard away from me. Other than being asked something what should I do? Say nothing unless asked? Sadly I used to play with the dog Molly she was very happy/energetic to see you but she passed away this week. NO DOG TO FOCUS ON!

The last cookout IMO went kind of bad Erica brought up my behavior of "Oh wow yum cooking etc." (Me excited to eat.) she commented "Does she do this at home?" (So I then fealt embarrased.) THEN Erica is all negative bringing up the no driving/apartment thing. I kept as I'd call it embracing AS/Autism saying to myself others don't drive it's no big deal don't let it get to you. Keeping up this facade/mask IS HARD! What to do?????

Thanks.

I'm never much fun to be around during family gatherings. But I suspect that there is little expectation that I will be conversational. I just try to not be obnoxious. That keeps things from getting out of control.

I try to find somewhere to hide. I have a huge family my mom has 14 brothers and sisters with 78 first, second, and third cousins. You can tell my mother and father are from West Virginia . Family reunions are a nightmare for me I only know 20% of my cousins the rest are total strangers to me.

I used to just sit quietly in the corner nursing my non-alcoholic drink or cup of tea and hoping nobody spoke to me. But of course this would lead to me "thinking too much" and getting in a state because I couldn't enjoy it like everybody else did. So my latest tactic, apart from NOT GOING, is to take on a job to keep me occupied and out of trouble ... food prep, clearing up, washing up, errand runner, whatever ... I often get a little over-zealous with this though and people think it's a bit weird, but I'm much more comfortable DOING something than sitting uncomfortably in a corner. When I do have to sit, I try not to put earphones in because that obviously comes across as "being rude", but I do play almost constantly with my iphone (I have a few games for this purpose that keep me calm - people generally just think I'm a text-a-holic, but that is not true).

I don't see anything wrong with talking about what someone is cooking.

I would just bring my things I like doing and sit by myself and entertain myself. Every time I go to social gatherings, I sit by myself and do my own thing or walk around.

No one seems to have a problem with me.

Your sister kind of sounds like a b*itch. Does the no hitting women rule apply to siblings?

I'd try to socialize with and meet people at any gathering. I was always the kid sitting in the corner with the GBA at family gatherings, and people look down on you for that sort of thing. You can try not to care, or just say "Screw these people" but I try to use every perplexing social situation as an opportunity to improve my synthetic Aspie social skills.

BYOD? Bring your own dog.

I tend to look down even more on people that look down on me.

My sister came down and I did spend time around her, saying a few comments here and there. Then I started on the beer and by the end of the night I was saying very not nice at all things about Nostradamus and 2012 theories. My sister also thinks I come up with ridiculous answers likes when I said that double jeopardy shouldn't apply to time travelers or people who clone their victims or kill the same person in a parallel universe.

I always do the "Not talk unless spoken too" thing too. It's a shame that Molly passed away - she sounds like fun. All parties should have a range of animals to play with.

I discovered photography as a hobby a few years ago. My family accuse me of using it as an excuse to wander around taking photo's instead of interacting. I think they're right. People hassle me a lot less now that I always look busy. Is there something you could do to look busy?

Thanks everyone I found out 20-25 people are going to be there. I am drained sadly. I didn't fall asleep until past 2AM hopefully I have a good day. Most days I get woke up where I don't get my aloted time of sleep I'm meltdown central. Hopefully it goes well.