Reaction to <coming out> as Aspergers?

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(forgive certain spelling errors - my keyboard is broken and wont display certain letters)

I think I know somebody with Aspergers. I am fairly confident about it after having known them for a while (I could list the reasons why, but Id rater not do that in the first post). I was reading a topic here about how NOT to respond, but I didnt see anything about the most appropriate way to respond. I dont know if this person will ever confirm my suspicions, but I want to be prepared if I am right and one day they decide to tell me.

So heres a question for all you people: if you wanted to tell someone you had known for a while that you had Aspergers, how would you want them to respond? What are some responses you would NOT want to ear?

I was thinkin about sayin somethin like <oh, okay. I had suspected it before.> Would this be ok, or is the reference to havin suspected it before unacceptable?

Some specifics about my situation: the person I am speakin about is my boyfriend and I am is girlfriend. he as already told me something else about him which, in my opinion, would be much more of a problem and which is less obvious (pathological lying). I doubt hell ever tell me outriht, so I was thinkin about askin as to why he as extra time on the SAT. he brought it up on two occasions but seeing as we were in the middle of a different conversation, he neglected to explain it. I do not want to be like <Do you ave Aspergers?> because I feel thats WAY too forward and rude. Would my way of bringing it up be acceptable, or would you consider it rude/nosy/inappropriate, etc.?

Also, because I know somebody will bring tis up... the reason I want to know if he was diagnosed. Why do I want to know this? Its just a label, after all. Would it make a difference if he werent diagnosed? Does it matter? Well, I do think that knowing that he officially has Apergers would help because it would provide an explanation for some of is beaviors. I guess it would make it easier to understand. I wouldnt stop loving him either way; the only thin Im lookin for is confirmation or negation.

I would like to thank in advance everyone who responds. This matters a lot to me. I have problems offending or hurting people when I dont mean it (my parents know this firsthand), so I would really like to take precautions and avoid offendin my boyfriend were he to tell me that he as Aspergers. And if he doesnt have it/is not dianosed, hey, better to come overprepared tan underprepared, I always say.

maybe say you know somebody who has aspergers and ask if he knows anything about it....

also how do you know he isn't on this forum if he does indeed have it?

Once diagnosed, people can focus on curing or managing their illness. Even though it's just a label, the label serves an important purpose.

Pathalogical lying might be related to him trying to behave normally and or lack of confidence.

Each person is different but for me - asking if I know anything about asperges, then saying its ok if you do have it would be best.

There's no really easy way to ask something if they have a life long serious mental condition, but itsead of asking outright, you could ask "Do you know anything about aspergers? Maybe you can look it up"

So I should try to sort of be like <What do you know about Aspergers?> in a casual way, and be supportive and such. I figured so. Is there anything else that might be helpful in getting him to talk about it?

He definitely knows what it is; it came up in conversation a few days ago and he defined it to my friend as <high functioning autism>. He also once said, in response to speculation tat a certain girl had Aspergers, <she doesnt have Aspergers. Trust me.> This implied that he knew somebody with Aspergers or at least was familiar enough with the condition to be able to tell if someone else had it.

I think he might be a little... ashamed of it? I am not sure. He once told me he had extra time on te SAT, and that he thought it was stupid, as in he didnt need extra time. I doubt tat he would have an account here since hes not te forum type and since it doesnt seem like he would identify strongly with the label.

People tell me they always thought there was something wrong with me when I tell them I have Aspergers. People I don't know usually just nod their heads to pretend they know what Aspergers is.