In trouble......?

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Seriously, I was just now playing alone on my 3rd floor apartment deck balcony and now I am shaking/nervous. I performed the mentos + diet coke experiment and it EXPLODED - violently. I used 2 L of Coke Zero plus an entire package of mentos. OK, it's spectacular BUT.....I am concerned since the fizzy reacted Coke Zero ejected, then leaked all over my neighbor's balcony deck on the 2nd and even 1st floor. The 1s floor neighbors are starting their mini-flower deck garden. Lots of them are on their decks having a bbq, etc.

I hope 2nd and 1st floor neighbors aren't upset? Their deck is soaked. I imagine they can figure out it came from above. This just now happened and I directly came inside and am typing now. Feeling ashamed. Should I apologize? Hide out here, with the blinds closed? Leave my Apt for a while? I don't even know these people.

Anyway, if you're wondering - here's how-to:


[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKoB0MHVBvM&feature=related[/youtube]

THE ultimate Memorial Day fun event, yes? For an Aspie.
Post bail?

Hmm...

I think that doing an experiment where other people had the potential to be impacted wasn't the wisest idea. The reason you don't want to do it where your own belongings will be damaged is the same reason others don't appreciate it when it damages their stuff or their plans. Before something like that I would mentally flow out all the possible results that could happen if it would go wrong, and how that would impact you if someone else did it in your vicinity.

Now, I tend towards excessive empathy/pre-emptive apologies myself, and I'm never quite sure when I'm getting myself in trouble by doing that. (I think I feel others' emotions too easily.) So, I'm not quite sure whether you should go to them and apologize before they come looking to express their displeasure. But if they do express their displeasure, I think the best thing would probably be to say that while it was an accident, you're sorry that it disrupted their plans or messed up their clothes/plants/whatever. I think that whatever you say should give them the impression that you're able to put yourself in their shoes and understand how you'd feel if something like that happened and messed up your property or routine.

I dunno, though...it IS a tough situation, and I think more opinions would be a good idea, because like I said, I think I err too much in the direction of gushing and pre-emptive apologies!

One more question. Could you hear any of your neighbor's immediate reactions when it happened?

Currently, I am still somewhat nervous due to uncertainty. It all happened so fast. Since I immediately came inside I do not know if the neighbors are <insert emotion here> The chemical reaction is certainly not dangerous or toxic, albeit messy.

I ought to go out now and check. I am sorry if it spilled on their plants or worse, them. Coke Zero can stain clothing. Plus, although I do not know them, they are my neighbors. I've never performed the Mentos + Diet Coke experiment so I did not know it would react so robustly (not an excuse, I just did not know).

Maybe the neighbors below are so festive in their bbq festivities they did not notice? Sigh, I'll venture out
Mea culpa.

I hope that things resolve themselves in the end.

Hmm...not having actually heard your neighbors' reactions, then, I can't be truly certain. However, I can say that if there was any disruption to what they were doing, or any property damage, they won't be happy.

At least if you go out to check, that might get you points for caring about their situation. If I were in your shoes, I think that after the immediate shock I would want to know if everyone was OK. Make no mistake, I'd be scared, but I personally think that if people know you're genuinely sorry (and I think avoiding excuses helps), that can help. There have actually been studies that when doctors commit mistakes, they're more likely to be sued if they refuse to show any kind of sympathy towards the patient. (I THINK I read that in the book Blink, by Malcolm Gladwell, but don't hold me to that.)

Am nervous. However, as I've heard nothing transpire otherwise, I'll just stay put. I am hyper-conscientious and sometimes worry unnecessarily. Hopefully that's the case? I imagine if they were upset/injured (?) they'd be letting me know! Our decking is wooden and Coke Zero won't show.

Resolution: In the future, perform the Mentos + Diet Coke experiment in the field.

Thanks, CockneyRebel. I must say, nifty experiment though!

If you are really and truly sorry, and if anyone comes looking for you for ruining something of theirs, immediately offer to pay for the damages. This is the social rule in that situation. Often, people will say thank you and then never present you with a bill and never ask for the money. Sometimes they will present the bill, although that's less often or only if the damage was very expensive. But whether they take the money or not, everyone who understands the social rules feels grateful that you offered to pay for the damages because it means more than just saying "I'm sorry."

That was my first gut reaction too, if something was damaged, to offer to pay. I didn't want to say it because I was a bit worried that was "overboard"...but that IS my gut feeling.

Your gut feeling was in line with what is taught socially. People with "good manners" offer to pay for things they've damaged, even accidentally.

Something that has taught me a lot about what the optimal social rules are (people break them all the time because there are a lot of rude people out there -- asperger's does NOT have the market cornered on rude! -- and because there are people out there who haven't been taught properly by their parents) is reading modern etiquette books. I most enjoy Judith martin (Miss Manners) because she has an entertaining writing style, but any mainstream etiquette book published in the last 20 years is usually helpful.

From reading Miss Manners, I have learned such things as how to politely say no to someone who keeps insisting or applying peer pressure, how to react when someone else breaks an etiquette rule, how to respond when the annoying uncle keeps making racist jokes, and what to do if you've accidentally damaged someone's stuff. Some of what Miss Manners says is intentionally old-fashioned, like telling you to get good writing paper with black edges for writing condolence notes when people die (Miss Manners says Hallmark cards are tacky but that's old-fashioned now and people expect and appreciate cards -- although Miss Manners is right that people appreciate a hand-written note (assuming you have legible handwriting, which I don't) even more.)

Speaking of which, if you have a hard time writing notes or figuring out what to write in cards, Miss Manners has an excellent book about communication in which she teaches things like that it's not only acceptable to use cliches but preferable because they exist for a reason: they are a form of expressing a thought that is safe, comforting, and not too unusual. from Miss Manners, I've learned that if you find out that someone has died, it's okay to say "I'm sorry about your loss" and just leave it at that and people will feel comforted because it is the expected ritual thing to say. I found it very useful because no one really knows what to say when someone has died and Miss Manners makes it easy by giving you a list of phrases and even telling you which are considered more formal, more casual, etc.

I LOVE etiquette books because I love knowing the rules of situations and that's what etiquette is: the rules for relating to other people. But etiquette changes over time so it's better to read newer etiquette books. But okay to read some that are a little older because I've learned that about 80% of the time, it's better to have old-fashioned manners than to try to figure things out as I go along. LIke it's better for me to bring flowers or wine if someone invites me to dinner than to sit around wondering what will be expected of me and should I or shouldn't I. If a mainstream etiquette book from 1970-today says it's what people do, I try to do it. And it usually works out fine.

Feel better - Coke Zero evaporates and even on my deck there's no sign. Outside there's no evidence. If they felt anything it was wet Coke Zero and there's no one outside even.

I am very polite. Polite to a fault, even. But since nothing is wet, OK. But best to err on the side of caution. That and I tend to panic when given event is unexpected. I am an exceedingly quiet tenet. During this holiday weekend quite a few neighbors are outside and playing.

Miss Manner's etiquette columns are well presented and I like her approach too. Aside from that, the Coke Zero + Mentos experiment is so worth it. Do not try it at home though.

I'm glad to hear things are better now.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKoB0MHVBvM&feature=related[/youtube]



That is so cool....it was better than a fireworks display!.....you only used one bottle though right???

I bet you in a month's time, you'll find this whole incident hilarious.

surely the deck is all sticky? I'd like to think i would offer to scrub their deck. If they did not notice previously try to make a joke about myself being a fool for doing such if they are the type of people who might find it funny. Difficult to say as i have never met you or your neighbours

That's a relief! It sounds like you shouldn't have to do anything at all and no one will even notice. Plus people are (within limits) understanding that things will sometimes get spilled or fall off balconies.

It's for those sorts of reasons that I try to always choose a top floor apartment. Yes, there are more stairs and I don't like that part but there's no one walking around on my ceiling or dropping heavy things on my ceiling or overflowing toilets or tubs that spill down through my ceiling and it's less likely that people will be looking in my windows, either accidentally or on purpose.