How many actual friends can you say you've ever had / have?
No. I see and hear from my best friend much less than other friends but she is still my best friend. We're both socially awkward enough that we don't have to get on the phone every single day and still know that the other is there. When we're together, it's like no time or space had ever passed between us. We keep in touch with email, facebook and livejournal... and that's not every day either. She's my children's godmother so my daughter and her text-message a lot. I couldn't imagine her not being in the world or in my life. I wish I lived close enough to see her every day because I could help her out with things that she has no one there to help her with (practical reasons) but in terms of our friendship, it does not matter that we live in different US states or that we don't talk every day.
No. I see and hear from my best friend much less than other friends but she is still my best friend. We're both socially awkward enough that we don't have to get on the phone every single day and still know that the other is there. When we're together, it's like no time or space had ever passed between us. We keep in touch with email, facebook and livejournal... and that's not every day either. She's my children's godmother so my daughter and her text-message a lot. I couldn't imagine her not being in the world or in my life. I wish I lived close enough to see her every day because I could help her out with things that she has no one there to help her with (practical reasons) but in terms of our friendship, it does not matter that we live in different US states or that we don't talk every day.
Thank you. Your post is very helpful for me.
I can relate to what you say about when you and your best friend are together, it's like no time or space has passed between you. That's how I feel about my friend too. I'd also like to live closer to my friend so I can see her more often.
For me I have my best friend from elementary school, who I am still good friends with. I am also quite close with my cousin, who is the same age than me.
My final year of high school was probably my best year socially.
For the most part, the number of friends I've had at one time were in the single digits.
Overall, I've had a good number of friends over the years...although I did not have any reciprocal relationships until I was around 17, so I am fairly new to the concept of 'friends' altogether.
The problem is, however, that some of them found better friends and moved on. Plus, a lot of them were superficial to begin with. When I moved away from the city and deleted facebook, I lost touch with many people who I hoped would still be there for me.
Another problem is that some of them live very far from me...what happened was we used to hang out they've moved away to different places. My best friend lives in Florida, another teaches in South Korea, and a few go to univeristies and colleges in other parts of the province.
What I miss the most is walking down the street or taking the bus to hang out with a couple of friends, like I did when I lived in the city.
When I see any of my friends, its a minimum two hour long bus ride...worth it because its the only social contact I get. I hate being isolated!
_________________
Given a “tentative” diagnosis as a child as I needed services at school for what was later correctly discovered to be a major anxiety disorder.
This misdiagnosis caused me significant stress, which lessened upon finding out the truth about myself from my current and past long-term psychiatrists - that I am a highly sensitive person but do not have an autism spectrum disorder
My diagnoses - anxiety disorder, depression and traits of obsessive-compulsive disorder (all in remission).
I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.
ChekaMan
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 17 Aug 2010
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 184
Location: Whitstable,UK
4 that have been somewhat friends.
Middle school - SM - female, NT, good social skills. Our friendship didn't worked well despite our good will. She went tired of me, because i talked always of my special interests and she once said 'now you're not a kid anymore, please, talk about normal topics!'
High School
EC - Female, NT, eccentric, with good social skills. She seemed to enjoy what i am. And she liked both to be around people and to stay with me, talking about special interests. She was a very funny person
SC - Female, NT, bad social skills. At the start we have been friends because she had my same interests: Draw comics. We talked for the whole year only about comics. She was a very calm person. But the year later she wanted to be around large group of people, and for doing this she abandoned her special interests and she started to do very silly things (like getting drunk). When I daid i didn't liked her new behaviour, she answered 'I don't want to be an outsider!'
GP - Male, NT, eccentric, some autistic traits (stimming, always focused in his special interests), good social skills. I enjoyed his company, because some of his special interests were the same as mine.
I currently have only one friend. She's NT, slighty eccentric. But i can't say if she has good or bad social skills. I have never seen her in a social situaton.
_________________
Vaccines can cause cancer in cats. Think about that, before vaccine yours (I'm owner of a VAS survivor cat)
- Sorry for bad english (and bad norwegian), I'm italian -
2012 - år av nordlys... og sørlys.
- La diversità è l'elemento principe del mondo -
I have been thinking about the whole friendship thing lately.
Primary school - I had 1 so called "best friend" who I was supposedly friends with until I was 18 when we left school and maybe 4 or 5 others who sort of came and went.
Secondary school (10-17) - other than that 1 same friend no others; due to problems I had to have home schooling (although I went into school sometimes) so I think everyone thought of me as a bit strange and the friends that I had had in the previous school deserted.
Throughout my degree and up until now - 0 friends.
Recently reading and learning about AS made me realise that I don't think I know how to make an aquantance into a friend, (not that I really have many aquantances either.) I read an article about disclosure (actually I think it was on WP) which was something I had never thought about but I can see that this seems to be a crucial factor; I guess it comes naturally to NT's how much disclosure is appropriate but because I am unsure I tend not to give much away so I guess I may come off as aloof without meaning to. The 1 best friend I mentioned I have come to realise that we were not really "true" friends anyway. She was very domineering so with hindsight I am now seriously questioning her motives. I certainly remember feeling that I didn't have the some sort of relationships with friends as my sister had with hers.
In the last couple of weeks I have realised that when I was at college a couple of people may actually have tried to "befriend" me and I just didn't see it, until now! Only 6 years too late And there was a guy who I am now wondering.........oh well missed it!
jonnysound
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 8 Jan 2011
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 54
Location: Doncaster, England
I had a so called friend at primary school, at the end of primary school he said he could no longer be my friend, he never explained why. People can be evil.
_________________
(bluepill)- the blissful ignorance of illusion
(redpill)- embracing the sometimes painful truth of reality
(officially diagnosed with Asperger's 2nd June 2011 @ 12:56pm)
I have certain people I see and talk to in different situations.
for example:in school,online,outside school,family occasions...
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note:You may refer to me as :she,her...etc
Gender: Female.
The tale of the bus that didnt want me to get on...BUSSSSSSSSS..
COCONUT-MOON TURTLE!
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