"It's not possible to survive and think that way!"

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... Then how am I still alive and talking to you?

A friend of mine told me today that it's not possible to think in absolutes the way I do and continue to survive and essentially told me that I was faking it as an excuse for messing up. I often think in absolutes and don't think to ask questions about specifics of a task. If specifics aren't given, I don't imply them and I either mess up what I'm doing or get very confused and anxious and sometimes am unable to ask because I feel stupid for not knowing. Recently I totally screwed over a social task and this friend is convinced that it's the end of the world because I bungled it and have potentially hurt his social standing (nothing has happened yet, he's just convinced it is going to happen).

I don't understand where NTs get off saying things like this. I'm alive and this is the way I think. The friend has been warned over and over and over and over again to give me specifics on a task, but he doesn't. I don't care if he doesn't "believe" I think the way I do. The fact is that I do think this way and it's not going to change based on your belief or lack therefore of. It makes me half tempted to become more rigid in the way I think just to punish him for saying that.

Anyone else get bull like this from NTs?

"It's not possible to survive and think that way" sounds like a fairly absolute statement. Perhaps your friend would do better with a moderate perspective, that different people have different ways of thinking.

I got crap from my old boss because I don't think he also believed it too that I was unable to pick up on things he didn't say by reading between the lines and he expected me to use common sense and thought I wasn't using it. He also pulled the "You're very smart" card so he didn't think I could be that stupid. I guess I should take that as a compliment.

But I did ask questions because I couldn't understand or remember how to do it or where an item was. They kept moving stuff around and I was still expected to find it without being told where it is. I would ever try and look for it if it wasn't in that spot so I try and look around that area too if it wasn't there. I felt even though I tried harder, I still screwed up except it was even more.

But I have noticed people seem to expect you to ask questions but how can you ask questions if you don't know what you were supposed to ask? If you think you understand something, why would it occur to even ask? Like if I am shown what to do, if I understand it, how would I even know what to ask? How would I even know I misunderstood something? By the time I know, it's already happened because the person tells me making himself more clear and then I realize I messed up.


But working for a local company that is for people with disabilities, it's not like this. They just assume there was a miss communication and they weren't clear enough so they correct it by making it more clear. I once had to do a job that was someone else's because she was away and I thought I understood but the next day the boss was telling me there was a miss communication and he maybe wasn't clear enough. He told me I needed to get all the trash and I thought he told me I didn't need to do it because someone else got it. At my old job, the office clerk be telling me I didn't listen if I screwed up like that. People just assume I don't listen when I don't understand something.

Wow I would have done the same too. Look for vanilla honey flavor and then buy them both thinking they can both be used at once because they didn't have vanilla honey flavor. Then explain when I got home they didn't have that so I had to get both.

I might have bought three each making that I bought six total or just take out my cell phone and call asking what does he mean by three single containers. Like buy three of them?


Luckily I don't get this issue simply because people around me understand, my family and husband.

lol i get bull like this but i have learned to deal with it.

I love how some people think that if you don't do things (thinking) their way, it's all wrong. I've lived around this kind of narrow train of thought all my life. It's stupid. People just need to learn to allow for differences in thought process. Who cares if we're a little different? It's like realizing we all come in a rainbow hue of beiges & browns in color. We also speak different dialects & accents. So why can people see & hear the obvious, but not be able to translate it to the thought process?