Having to prove obsession to other people?

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Meerkats were my special intrests YEARS and YEARS before Meerkat Manor. I can proudly say I was obsessed with meerkats before it became popular. I know it sounds weird, but it felt as if my obsession with meerkats was being stolen from me. My mom says it's because I am selfish and don't want to share. Well, I feel as if people are stealing it from me behind my back without my permission. I felt as if I had been raped when I found out how popular meerkats were after Meerkat Manor. Whenever anyone asks if I like Meerkat Manor or is all like, "OMG! You must really like that Meerkat Manor show!" I want to strangle them.
Suddenly it was considered cool to like meerkats. I was no longer teased or harassed for it. Everyone it seemed as obsessed with meerkats. It made me sick and repulsed. I knew they were posers and only thought they loved meerkats so much and sure enough when Meerkat Manor was over, they were done with them. I would tell people I was obsessed with meerkats and they would say sheer stupid things such as "Oh, I am too! They're so cute!"

I would scoff back, "No you're not."
"Yes I am."
I would scream bloody murder, "NO! YOU ARE NOT!" By then my mother would have to intervene and pull me away and appolgize to the other person. I would just give the other person the evil eye until they left or my mum or dad hauled my ass away to the car. I know for a fact, that only another autistic person can be truly, truly obsessed with meerkats.

Anyway, after Meerkat Manor, I started to feel as if I had to prove my obsession. I used too because everyone liked them. I started doing things that REALLY made my meerkat obsession stand out such as buying every meerkat related thing I could find...planing elebrate meerkat themed tatoos and coming up with some EXTREME meerkat themed body modification. My mom wouldn't let me get a tatoo. I can't drive and she would have to drive me. My brother has offered to take to get a tatoo but I know he really wouldn't live up to it and when they found out how extreme I wanted to take it, they wouldn't let me either. I was even considering taking a razor and carving detailed meerkats into my skin. I never did because the delicate detail I wanted wouldn't be possible to achieve with a regualr razor. I think carved meerkats would be better than tatoos of them because anyone can get a tatoo, but it takes a special dedication to be willing to carve something into one's skin. I was always facinated by this tribe somewhere in Asia that likes tigers so much, they make tiger stripes on their skin...with a hammer. I'd LOVE to do something like that to show my dedication for meerkats. The pain would only show everyone how truely I was obsessed with meerkats and expose those Meerkat Manor posers for the phonies they are. Anyway, do you feel as if you have to prove your obsessions to others?

Firstly, why do you need to prove this to others? Enjoy your meerkats however you see fit.

Also, I have no idea what Meerkat Manor is and, outside of some cute photos I see sometimes, don't really hear about meerkats that much.

I'm sure that this perceived public obsession with meerkats will fall out of fashion as fast a meerkat chases after tasty things.

Also, with special interests you're inevitably going to run into a time where that interest spikes in popularity. I say "who cares?"

I don't know why. Ever since Meerkat Manor came out, I've just felt the need to prove that I am more obsessed with them than others. I'm even considering changing my last name to Meerkat. I hate my real last name anyway because of the negetive memories associated with it.

I've been a Kinks Fan my whole life. The Kinks have become popular again, in some parts of world. I'm actually in my glory because of it. I feel like a part of something, because there isn't only a Beatles revival going on anymore.

I don't really know about what you describe, but I did have a discussion with my therapist over what constitutes a special interest. She was trying to tell me my interests were not indicative of AS, and I was saying "Obsessive interests are in the bloody criteria!"

For some reason, she seems to think that ADHD leads to the same kind of intense focus.

And it was completely normal for me to spend ten years primarily obsessed with one single game that hardly anyone else I knew cared about.

No.

How can I prove to to others what my obsession is, when they already know what it is?

What I mean is, do you feel as if you have to prove you are more obsessed with said obession more than anyone else who claims to also be obsessed with it? To the point of modifying your body in ways some people might consider "mutilation"?

What, do you mean like tattoos?

I never felt the need to prove an obsession to people, but I can attest to feeling possessive of whatever interest I have. For me, it's a matter of wanting to covet my interest and keep it from the prying eyes of the world, as if my interest is something special that needs to be protected. I'm possibly a bit anti-Aspie in that I actually don't like to talk about my interests unless I know and trust the person really well. I'm too private for my own good, sometimes.

It's harder to keep them hidden. The bird stuff usually leaks out eventually and people think I'm really strange for it, but at the same time some people will pick my brain like crazy fascinated by what I know.

But Sonic the Hedgehog, that one usually comes out eventually, but I try to hide it as long as possible, seen as weirder IMO and nobody seems to care about Sonic knowledge.

Mental Health... I seem to fill my day with something mental health related, I'm usually at the social center talking about birds with other mental health patients.

I havent even heard if Meercat Manor is still a show. I believe it was cancelled. Also no I cant ever say I have felt the need to prove to anyone how obsessed I am. I know of only one other person on here and that was or is the I Love Lucy Fan.

That's me, and yes, it is true that I get super competitive about my biggest special interests.

My latest example of this is that, two months ago, I found an I Love Lucy site online. I was excited, especially since the site didn't have much on it. I happily went to work on making the pages much more complete than they were, but the owner of the site didn't like all of my knowledge and DELETED my hard work that took many hours without even asking my permission to do so. I was so angry and wanted to make a Lucy site so badly that I started my own that very night. Exactly two months later, I am almost completely finished with the website, and it is chock full of trivia and facts that you wouldn't learn anywhere else. Nobody knows more about the show than I do.

What makes ME get competitive is when others think that they're more passionate about one of my biggest SIs than I am. First of all, if the person isn't an Aspie, that isn't even possible. Secondly, most people who "challenge" me, thinking they know more than I do, have such an elementary knowledge that it's laughable. Like, once at my college, some girl I didn't even know challenged me about Lucy, and she couldn't even tell me the title of episode #66. And others challenge my status as official #1 fan of the YouTube series "Is It a Good Idea to Microwave This?", and the questions I get that are supposed to "stump" me are beyond basic. I love talking to fellow fans of my SIs, but it just REALLY bugs me when somebody thinks they are at my level of passion/obsession.

Also, good to see you back on here, PunkyKat. I missed reading your special interest posts. We're a lot alike in the realm of special interests.

Sonic the hedgehog is my newest special intrest. I'm not really famaliar with the comics though. For some reason, I feel the need to hide it from everyone in real life. Whenever it comes up, I quickly change the subject. Maybe I'll start a thread on the need to hide special intrests from others. I don't want to share. *kidnaps Tails and runs off off to a selucded place to snuggle him in peace while he's thinking, "Hurry up, Sonic and save me from this deranged fangirl!"



^^^^^^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Last edited by MagicMeerkat on 13 Jun 2011, 1:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I seem to get into things that already have way too many obsessives in the first place to compete. It's either dead writers or musicians who've been recording longer than I've been alive. Plus, I'm usually a bit embarrassed by my obsessions because they're like evidence of the fact that I'm on the spectrum. I'd rather not everyone knew that I'm an aspie.

When it comes to poetry, I can't be too competitive about something so subjective and personal.

Yes, I know all about that possessiveness about an obsession. When I was younger I could be quite overbearing about it. And yes, it does feel like someone is stealing something from you when the mainstream steps in and suddenly, the thing you were possibly harassessed and teased about is suddenly popular. People jumping on that pop culture bandwagon as it rolls by do NOT share your level of interest. In fact, most people are incapable of imagining the depths of the levels of an obsessive interest. Hence why it is considered a psychiatric disorder.

That said - you do need to learn to share with the world. It is NOT an easy thing to do. For me, I ended up getting so disgusted when other people embraced my interest that I would abandon it. That was probably a bad thing because I beleive it was emotionally damaging, just like a bad breakup or a divorce maybe. I felt scarred by losing my passion for something I loved so deeply. Now, I steer my interests into the realm of other people. I seek out other people - usually on line- that share my interest in order to keep myself grounded and in a 'sharing' frame of mind. The more you preseverate on your interest alone, the harder it will be to break out of that habit.

Find others online that like Meerkats - maybe just start out by reading the Meerkat Manor forum boards, (if they have one). Resist the urge to jump in and post in others conversations. Just get used to the idea of sharing... and being open to other peoples intrusion into 'your' world. Start small, go slow and be patient with yourself. It can get better!