CockneyRebel wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
I'm pleased when somebody says "please." It implies the person respects you.
Same here. "Pass me the butter, please?" sounds a lot better to me than "Pass me the butter."
I do think there can be a 'dark' side to the word please though. It can enforce respect in situations, a phoney formality, and subservience to the person please it is being said to. I'm not saying i don't think please should ever be said, and cultural customs dictate a certain amount artifice for the purpose of civility.
I forget the culture (maybe someone can tell me?) who pretend that they don't want to be paid after they serve you a meal in a restaurant, because their food is not worthy of you, then you insist, then they say no, and so on till you finally pay, even though you were going go pay all along, and you both new this.
As with perhaps any polite custom, you can find yourself in a situation where being polite, is irksome, because the balance of power can be exploited by the person receiving the politeness, and they exploit this to make themselves feel important.
_________________
Nothing lasts but nothing is lost