When did you start wanting a normal social life...if ever?

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When did you start wanting a normal social life?
I've always wanted a normal social life. 15%  15%  [ 10 ]
When I realized I didn't have one (state age) 9%  9%  [ 6 ]
Never. 24%  24%  [ 16 ]
I used to but I don't anymore. 21%  21%  [ 14 ]
Elementary School 3%  3%  [ 2 ]
Teenage years. 9%  9%  [ 6 ]
Adulthood 12%  12%  [ 8 ]
Other (explain) 6%  6%  [ 4 ]
Total votes : 66

Chronos
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14 Jun 2011, 11:11 pm

Some people with AS/ASD desperately want a normal social life and others are content without one. Where do you place?



jojobean
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14 Jun 2011, 11:38 pm

Ever since I was in the 3rd grade, I realized that I was different, but could not put my finger on it. I spent most of my life feeling like I was dropped out of space onto my head....I didn't know why until I saw Temple grandin on 60 minutes when I was 28...then I said...THATS ME!!
After much research and a confession from my mom, I found out that I was already diagnosed when I was a 8 years old but she never told me cause she did not want to "label" me.

Now I just try to be me, but sometimes still feel like I been droped on my head from some alien ship. Neverless I am a card carrying member of WP!! !


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johnsmcjohn
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14 Jun 2011, 11:38 pm

When I was younger, I knew I was different but I had no idea why. I never wanted to socialize and when my mom forced me to I was miserable. Today, I can be in crowds well enough(I just pretend no one exists) but I'm most comfortable either at home, or in a corner of a bookstore reading. I have no desire to socialize or make friends. It's not a "people suck" thing or a "screw the world" thing, I just don't want to do it.



AbleBaker
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15 Jun 2011, 12:53 am

Same with me. I was always a loner. As a kid I somehow expected I would "grow up" and do what everyone else was doing but it just never happened.



JWS
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15 Jun 2011, 1:48 am

I think I started wanting a more normal social life in my early- mid teens, but never could figure out how to!
Now I'm in a marriage to a woman who doesn't like it because of the limitations of my AS. :tongue: I cannot easily make "small talk", and this, in part, really bothers her...I also have other disorders that "stifle her".


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cyberdad
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15 Jun 2011, 1:54 am

I'm happy being a lone wolf stalking the suburbs (only when my wife gives me permission).

No on a serious note having a social life is irritating for me. I like my quiet time.



BassMan_720
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15 Jun 2011, 3:42 am

I haven't had a social life and have not met any potential friends since I arrived in Hong Kong last September. I finally plucked up courage and answered an ad to join a band. I met up with the guys last night and went for a few pints at the nearest music venue. The manager booked the band for its 1st gig on 1 July. Oh well!

I can now follow my interests, socialize and enjoy myself all at the same time.

The downside is that I have 2 weeks to learn a three hour set with nowhere to rehearse except for 2 one and a half hour sessions in a studio with the band. It's a good job playing bass is like riding a bike.



OJani
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15 Jun 2011, 5:06 am

I don't know what exactly "social life" means. I have friends, but I'm not socialize with people like others, and probably never will. I voted "I've always wanted a normal social life." because I never thought I wouldn't have one, I just couldn't imagine it for a long time.

AbleBaker wrote:
Same with me. I was always a loner. As a kid I somehow expected I would "grow up" and do what everyone else was doing but it just never happened.

Well, I expected too. It took a long time to happen, though (if ever). I hope I can say I'm ready to start out on the road having an own family, at last. To be honest, although I was ok being alone most of the time, not motivated enough to change it, I occasionally felt something was missing from my life.



Claradoon
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15 Jun 2011, 5:06 am

Other. Really only for the last month or two, since I sorted out a lot of crap from my early life. I developed a liking for some of my neighbours. I'm curious to see where this might lead.

But - "normal social life"? Uh, I guess it depends what you mean. If it involves noise and crowds, then my response would be Never.

Maybe I'm thinking of peace on earth.



Simonono
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15 Jun 2011, 5:28 am

I've wanted one but don't know how so I have given up and am relatively content with not having a social life, somewhat. Anyways, I've seen a lot of social activity at college, and it seems extremely boring to me.



jmnixon95
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15 Jun 2011, 5:36 am

I don't desperately want one, but it would be nice, so I just "want" one. Not all the time, either. Sometimes I find myself wanting one more than I do at other times.
Anyways, the first time I really sensed that I wanted one was in April of 2011, so I was (and I still am) fifteen.



Verdandi
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15 Jun 2011, 5:42 am

When I've wanted to socialize it is primarily for engaging in my interests, so I don't recall ever wanting a "normal social life." I've found attempts by others to include me in such to be intrusive (although I realize not intentionally so).



wavefreak58
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15 Jun 2011, 6:01 am

Never. For one, I have no real concept of what a normal social life is. I just know that I don't participate in social things in the same way that others do. Now that I am older and have a better idea of what "a social life" means, I just don't care that much.


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Jellybean
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15 Jun 2011, 10:04 am

I've never wanted a social life. I wish I didn't have any kind of social life now. I'd be happier without one.


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tomboy4good
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15 Jun 2011, 10:25 am

I'd say I must have been around 9 or 10 years old when I realized there was nothing normal about my home life. I would overhear other kids talking about their families activities (they never involved me directly): shopping together, camping together, or just hanging out at home playing boardgames together. The only thing we did as a family had to do with my dad's SI antiques. It was decidedly not the same as doing fun stuff as a family. I tried to get mom & dad to play board games, but they always blew me off. I also felt like an intruder at home. The vibes my parents put out was that they really didn't want me there.


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