Hikkikomori

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I just came across the Hikkikomori problem in Japan, I never knew that was a problem until recently. My mother is from Japan and I can totally understand why people in Japanese society just snap and can develop severe agoraphobia or social anxiety....the societal pressures there are easily double or triple what is expected in America, mainly because being 'different' is more acceptable in Western countries than a stratified society like Japan. My mom had a Japanese saying that my dad made her stop saying because its "not American". it went, 'でる　くぎ　は　うたれる”　or "the nail that sticks out will be beaten down"- meaning people who are not like the rest of you shall be ostracized or looked down upon. Also, you have to be proper at all times in Japanese culture, even though you really really really hate somebody or something you have to grin and bear it like everyone else. speaking out is like a social suicide in a lot of cases, especially if its against the popular view.

I look at my own life and realize im like a hybrid normal college guy and a hikkikomori. There are periods of time when I literally don't do anything social for anywhere from one week to like 2 months other than go to class and go home (to go online, read or play xbox). My girlfriend is 'normal' and just hates it when I do that, she doesnt get it . Then when I feel like it, I rejoin the social world and see my friends and go party, go down the river or go work out at the gym....but when I face some sort of rejection or bad incident I often find myself retreating into my apartment and isolating myself for a while....like a hikkikomori. My friends recently dubbed me "Bro-sama-Bin-Laden" because im one of the crew but sometimes I hide out for long periods of time without anyone knowing where I am or what im doing.

silly question but i kind of want to know how many of you do something similar to this, I feel like it would be more common with people with AS

I must admit, I clicked this because I saw the Japanese word "hikkikomori" and thought "Hey! I know what that is because I'm learning Japanese!" 小さな世界だね？ Anyway, yeah. I too am hikkikomori-ish; staying away from people for extended periods of time and what not, all while fulfilling my special interests.

my mother tried to teach me japanese but i was too dense to learn any but the japanese cursewords she used at me in frustration at my density. anyways, i suppose staying home from school for 3 months as a child, hiding in my room, was a form of hikkikomori, as is my hermithood for the past several years out in the woods in a tin can, alone. if i never hear UDASAI NAH! again, it will be too soon. at least in my solitude, nobody is upset with me.

Total hikkikomori here.
The sad thing is that it's no exaggeration.

Ever read Welcome to the N.H.K?

I read "Welcome to the N.H.K." but I am not an hikikomori myself.

ところで、私は日本語を勉強してます！！誰か練習したいかしら？

i watched a couple of eps of welcome to the nhk. it is why i know what a hikikomori is. i'm a little bit this way. i can spend hours by myself doing research, reading, zoning out, watching anime, whatever where no one can see me and i never tell them what it is i do when i'm alone or where i go or when. i vanish. i can not talk to people who dont live in the same house as me for days. lately i have been making more effort to go out and talk to people but even that is not much.

I like my solitude, but if someone wants to hang out, I'll probably oblige and enjoy it. I have always had a tendency to spend some time alone, but I'll only shut people out if I haven't had any alone time in a few months, and then I just need to isolate myself for a day or two. I usually just pick up a book; no one thinks it's weird to read alone.

During burnout that's very close to what I'm like.

The phenomenon itself is probably a combo of a lot of stuff, from AS to depression to introverted kids who just plain burn out when they push themselves too hard. Also in Japan it's quite crowded--very high population density--and getting time alone can be hard; so leaving once you're in your room can be more difficult than it is in the US, where everything's big and spacious and people aren't so crowded.

I'm hiding out right now. :)

Absolutely... im just not agoraphobic.

I watched the anime Welcome to the NHK and some of the themes definately struck a chord with my own life, though im not as bad as the main character.

おもしろいね、　イタリア人が日本語を勉強するなんて。　おれに　メッセジして　れんしゅできるよ。
ぎゃくに　今私は　友達から　イタリア語を　ならっていますので　そっちも　教えて下さい。

I find myself becoming more and more of the American equivalent to a Hikkikomori every day. So sick of humans in general and the inevitable drama that comes with any social situation.

Yep, I'm definitely a Hikkikomori too, but I've known that for years now, and I've known the name for a few years now also from extensive internet research.
I have mostly (99.9%) lost interest in other people, mostly due to my difficulty with social interaction, and find myself enjoying a reclusive lifestyle, as I have for most of my life already, but I haven't always liked it.
I actually skipped most (actually, ALL) of high school when I was younger just to get away from the people there and stay in my room and play video games everyday.

I've never had that much of a desire to meet new people and make friends, too much trouble.
I've always been interested in girls though, to my dismay, for my entire life, even when I was a toddler I liked girls, which is odd.
Luckily I've lost interest in relationships a few months ago, due to the realization of many deficits in the quality of ones life trying and failing to meet women, and trying to keep a relationship going and failing.
Too stressful, and not worth the frustration and depression.

I've not left my Home on my own for about 6 years now, and have no desire to leave whatsoever (except I would like to get my OWN place, rather than living at Grandma's house).
I was mostly the same way throughout my childhood and adolescence as well, but I did have a few friends back then (not great ones) and I had a girlfriend once (not a very good one).
Sometimes I used to go out to a friend's house just to play video games, and also my girlfriend back then used to drag me out of the house (having a girl with you really decreases social anxiety somehow).

I have immense social anxiety, and obviously agoraphobia.
I really have no idea how I was 'lucky' enough to make a couple friends (that were not so good) and a girlfriend (who turned out to be a traitor, and was pretty lame to begin with).
I don't care to make friends anymore after the trouble I've gone through, and no longer have friends, and getting a girlfriend is seemingly close to impossible (lacking 'power', what women are attracted to, it seems) and even if I did get a girlfriend, then comes even more trouble trying to keep her happy with 'power' or whatever it is that women what.

I can't get, or hold down a job, and am on SSI.
I tried many times when I was younger to get a job, and was rejected many times.
I was accepted for a job at Game Stop once when I was 17 though, due to me enthusiasm for video games, I'm sure, and I was there for 4 hours, and it was absolutely horrible, maybe a bit worse than school.
And, I tell ya... my people skills really SHINED that day! <sarcasm>
I quit immediately.

Anyway, my Hypergraphia is starting to act up. Sorry about that, I don't mean to be the only person in this topic who talks too much using text (many people have complained about this in my past).
This is my first post here on this account.
I felt I would post here first since I know I am a big time Hikkikomori/recluse.
I've been here before once, I was named 'Increase Blue' a year ago, but I only posted a few times and disappeared due to social anxiety and paranoia.

I'm not really sure what I'm doing here... I guess I'm just bored.
But, I have been a victim to cyber bullying many times for unknown reasons, so even online I avoid people, and I'm actually pretty paranoid that someone will threaten my well being, even here, where I should be able to fit in at least marginally since I have Asperger's... but to me, people are still people, and I am scared of people.
*puts up flame shield... out of paranoia?*

I lived in Japan for a year and studied Japanese for a long time. When I first learned about the hikkikomori, I found the topic very fascinating and did a lot of research on it. This was before I even learned about autism.

I had originally thought that some of my social difficulties were cultural. Living in Japan, however, taught my differently. I was still an outcast. Overall, though, I thought it was a good learning experience. While I don't ever want to live in Japan, I'd like to go back and visit for awhile.

Well, I don't have any friends, or a job, so I don't get out much. I used to go outside, get fresh air, but the neighbors stare. I'd suppose, having never left the family home is the grain that keeps me sane(-ish).