i found a rant i guess you could call it that that someone had on a site and it brought up some terms i was unfamilier with but desribed me perfectly.
Up to 60% of children with Autism have Salicylate intolerance causing them sometimes painful and socially limiting inflammatory bowel problems
might be my constipation problem right there, but i have no clue what Salicylate even is, is it in food? if so what kind? if not what is it i search on wikipedia and that didn't help in the least, i don't need a scientific term.
Up to 30% of children with Autism will have Rapid Cycling Childhood Bipolar, freaking uncontrollable mood swings and compulsive violent thoughts when holding weapons, yeah that's me.
Many Aspies have Avoidant Personality or Schizoid personality making social involvement rather different, if not sometimes avoided, well there is where the Schizoid thing comes in surprise, surprise, and someone else told me the two are never combined. i was not surprised to see this pop up. this i have big time every symptom on the list.
60% of Auties would fit these personality traits, another 30% do not but have a severely disabling anxiety disorder I call Exposure Anxiety. Exposure Anxiety, like OCD and Tourette's is not felt as part of one's selfhood but it does involve a chronic fight-flight state in which one may be imprisoned in involuntary and compulsive avoidance, diversion and retaliation responses and unable to do for oneself, as oneself or by oneself. It is a state comparable to an emotional 'palsy' so when the person may be compelled to vomit up food they wanted to eat, compelled to hold on for a day because they desperately need the toilet, compelled to starve themselves because they are aware they are hungry, compelled to reject or go without a jacket when they know they are cold, diverted into any direction but the one they actually want and compelled to reject any attention or help that triggers 'exposure'. You can just imagine how difficult this imprisonment is and the impact of despair and a severely impaired relationship with one's body and communication.
i think i just saw my life flash before my eyes, i have something like this. like how i hate something if i see it more then 5 times in one day on the net. how i will start to hate something even if i liked it before if i see it being overglorfied, [this is why i hate 2d sonic games they keep saying they are better then every other 3d sonic game] the legend of zelda falls in this category [except twilight princess], xenogears [they keep putting down xenosaga because of this game] i also will never like crack parings for this reason as well the more i see the more i hate.
if someone wants something for me even if i benifit from it i reject it involentarly, even if i myself wanted it beforehand. this is the most diificult thing to try to explain to an nt even my mom, i don't know why i hate [insert idea\thing\subject\whetever here] i just do. and she asks me why when i have no answer an nt will accept, i don't know why i just do and i don't ask questions about it, i just accept it.
26 Jun 2011, 1:53 am
