I picked not being understood as this is a major trigger for me. I got really hurt in school by teachers who thought demand qavoidance could be fixed by just brutalizing the kid enough.
Sensory issues - I have very hypersensitive hearing, I'm a picky eater, and I can't wear certain clothes. But as long as I avoid stuff that bothers me, I'm fine, and I suspect hypersensitivity also make stimming more fun.
Social Isolation - I'm not as social as more people. I prefer having friends, but I can live without them.
Lack of independence - I still live at home and can't live alone. But I don't really want to, either. I have great parents and I like living with them.
No girlfriend/boyfriend - part of my particular flavour of autism seems to be asexuality. I have no desire for a girlfriend or boyfriend. Since my cousins sexually abused me when I was little, I suspect being asexual has spared me a bunch of misery. Most sexual abuse survivors really struggle with the push-pull of wanting something they're terrified of.
People treat me with disrespect - I haven't gotten that much disrespect, actually. Probably because I come across as really smart but eccentric, and because my parents and I tend to hang out with university types who really value smart weird people. On the occasions that people have treated me with disrespect for autism-related things, though, I've gotten really angry.
Can not get a good job - This is frustrating for me. I don't have the organizational skills to apply for work. But I'm sure I'll figure out a way, and in the meantime I can live off my parents' incomes and have fun
Feel uncomfortable in public - I don't get embarrassed easily. I do feel uncomfortable around people due to sensory issues, plus fear related to having been bullied. But most of the time I enjoy social interaction anyway.
Not being understood - Yeah, I really hate this. Even my parents don't understand me as well as I'd like, and there's no way I can explain autism well enough in a brief conversation for anyone I meet to understand me properly.
Not understanding social rules - This only bugs me when people get mad at me for unintentional rudeness. And generally what bugs me isn't that I didn't know the rule, but that the rule existed in the first place.
Meltdowns - I have a big problem with meltdowns. This would probably be second, except that I think my meltdowns are more due to being sexual abuse survivor than being autistic (even though my way of expressing it is pretty typically autistic, the causes are usually more trauma-related).
NT's being so picky about my hygiene issues - Yeah, this bugs me. I don't want to be dirty, because it's bad for my health and because I don't like interacting with stinky people and hate the thought of someone feeling that way about me. But my organizational problems make it hard for me to stay clean, and if someone tells me I'm dirty it triggers an attack of self-hate. Mostly we've dealt with that by having my parents suggest baths for other reasons, such as that my hair needs shampooing (for some reason my hair being dirty doesn't carry the same emotional baggage).
Answering dumb questions like yours - Nah, I love when people ask questions about autism, no matter how dumb they are, just as long as the person is willing to listen to the ensuing excited monologue!
08 Jul 2011, 10:44 pm
