ASD and disproportionate effects of bullying

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One of the most common issues raised by Aspies like myself is that of bullying and effectively dealing with it.
It is not just that Aspies have a disproportionate tendency for being on the receiving end of bullying, in terms of quantity and frequency, but my experience is that the "quality" or effect of bullying on them is disproportionate, i.e. on an NT such bully tactics would not be as pronounced. My separate thread on "Aspies and having a thin skin" speaks somewhat to this.

It does not mean however that Aspies are crybabies - far from it - the disproportionate reactions i.e. self-doubt, feeling of treading on eggshells, making more Aspie-like mistakes are only natural since the bullying is 99% of the time predicated on dislike of the Aspie mindset and manifestations. Likewise, if someone were being harassed because of what colour or sexuality they were, without repercussions to the tormentor, I'm sure they would also feel VERY upset. So this disproportionate reaction to bullying does not mean that Aspies are in any way different, given the motivation for the bullying.

Indeed, when I last encountered bullying from a former boss, it greatly exacerbated my Aspie manifestations, which did not come out anywhere near to the same degree as in previous, but similar, jobs. So it created a vicious spiral or whenever my symptoms would come out more, the bully would attack more, and on it went. The bully must have detected a weakness in me somewhere, and then exploited it to maximum effect. Sometimes they would raise false criticisms of me expecting me to believe it because they sensed my naivete and fear, but more often than not I could identify the BS because it was inconsistent or I'd present the situation to a trusted third party detached from the situation and they confirmed as much.

Luckily I've had the insight to discard this foul treatment as being purely the bully's problem (as I have done in the past for similar bullies, such as ex-roommates, fake friends, and another authority figure at work...) which allows me to focus on ongoing self-improvement instead of always second-guessing myself and making slip-ups.

if people wanna think i'm stupid, they are welcome to think that or whatever other stupid thoughts they wish to think. outside of WP, i don't give a good god damn about anything anybody thinks or says at my expense, as long as it doesn't cost me money somehow. other people are just the barking dogs that i have to put up with in this hellworld called earth.

I have PTSD and SEVERE social anxiety as a result of being bullied as a child. Mental scars do not heal.

I wish I could say things people say never effect me......I think a lot of what I have gone through in relation to bullying has caused some damage. I mean I moved a lot as a child and it seemed like at every school it was the same the majority disliked me, there where people who verbalized it a excessivly and it was not usually one person trying to be mean it was usually 2 or more people verbally attacking me and then just being more entertained when I tried you know defending myself.......hard for someone with no social skills to verbally defend themself. I think my fourth grade year was the worst....it was so bad the one time I got injured(sprained my ankle) I refused to go to the nurses office or put Ice on it because I was afraid people would make fun of me for being 'weak' or would accuse me of making a big deal out of nothing to get out of class. In highschool a lot of times people just ignored my existance for the most part, though there were some nasty things said on occasion.....but it was usually just a feeling of no one wanting to be associated with me specifically......it was clear I was not welcome in anyones social circle. There were a few people I talked to but that is about it.

I mean its pretty upsetting when there is a lockdown at your school and a student is shot.........and even then people cannot get over their cliques or their petty reasons for disliking people and come together. And they did but I was left out of this coming together and supporting people. I guess I was not in the in group so people figured I could not possibly be having a difficult time dealing with what happened well I was developing worsened PTSD symptoms....I don't want to sound selfish like my feelings were more important than the girl getting shot but it did bother me how everyone was talking about how we all have to support each other wile completely excluding me from it.

The exclusion tactics were the worst for me, because it felt like I'd been lulled into a false sense of security & had that ease grabbed away from me. It also made me realise that some I considered to be friends actually seemed to hate me, which was obviously a horrible thing to face. It's made me very wary of how sincere people are being when they say they're my friend or they like me & things like that.

I was bullied, teased and put down by my peers all through high school. I'm still suspicious of teenagers to this very day because of this.

I experienced a lot of bullying in elementary school and in junior high. I also experienced a lot of social exclusion as well. I am now 46 years old and am now experiencing social exclusion from my church.
The bullying was not only verbal but physical as well. I was attacked at school and on the way home from school. I've never forgotten it. I applaud the people who are stopping the bullying in schools today. Perhaps the kids who are simply different won't have to experience what I did.

If it's a expected situation, no worries. If the situation is unexpected I'm more likely to be caught off my guard which isn't good. Highschool has taught me not to trust anyone or not show any weakness in front of the bullies. To prevent being targeted at highschool I put myself in a large group of girls but the bullying didn't stop there. I learned that girls can be just as vicious as boys. They excluded me from their group, didn't invite me to parties and then would talk about these parties openly in front of me. Now I deal with a bitter old woman who lives with me (boyfriend's mother) who yells at me all the time. Her words don't affect me that much since I expect it. I can't wait to move out

It's strange, isn't it. I seem to almost attract bullies somehow, and I have no idea what I'm doing to exacerbate the situation!

I was bullied for 4 years at primary school and 3 years at secondary school... Year 7 was the worst and I'm fairly certain that I have some mental scars as a result of that.

I think my problem has been not really knowing that I am being bullied until its all over. And then I feel bad because it become obvious I have a lack of insight into other people and why they do the things they do. I hate people who make it a mission to manipulate others and whenever it happens to me my aspie traits become pervasive and I withdraw in a confused state. Then months or so later I will realize that this person was deliberately manipulating me....but even then I am not 100% sure.

Ah bullying, I know it well. <~~Bully magnet since I was but a young child. It didn't stop when I graduated from high school. Instead, it has plagued me since I also entered the work force. I'm nearly 50, & it was the reason I resigned from my last job.