SammichEater wrote:
So, yesterday my dad bought me a car. Overall, it's in good condition, but it needed a bit of maintenance. Earlier today my dad and I were outside changing the spark plugs, and one of the neighbors pulls up into their driveway. We've lived next to each other for a good two years now, but yet I've never actually met them until today. Yeah, sure, I was nice and all, but how the heck does this guy know who I am? That kinda freaked me out a little bit.
About an hour after that, some car goes by and I hear a young girls voice say "nice car, [SammichEater]." So, yeah. I don't even know who this is, but not only did she recognize me, but she knows my name and she actually noticed that there's a third car in our driveway. To me, this goes well beyond any previous levels of comprehending social knowledge. Shortly after that, I was told that this girl is actually another neighbor of mine. Not only does she go to the same school as me, but she has tried to talk to me several times before. And I never noticed until today, because I just don't care.
After all this, I ate lunch and went back outside to continue working. My dad talked to the neighbors for a little bit, and although I was watching and listening to the interaction, it wasn't until after that I realized just how little I actually understood. The neighbor apparently made several attempts to start a conversation, but failed. I did not realize that he was purposely spending time outside in an attempt to socialize. It, like everything else today, never even crossed my mind. The only reason why is because it was specifically pointed out to me.
Apparently, as I have learned today, while I hardly know anyone, everyone seems to know me. I can't help but to realize just how oblivious I am to the whole social group going on around here. I've gone throughout my live not ever thinking about my neighbors, and it amazes me how much they think of me. If my neighbors got a new car, I wouldn't notice. If they attempted to befriend me, I wouldn't notice. If they needed me, I wouldn't ever know. Everyone's always talking about me, yet I'm hardly even aware of their existence.
It's just kinda funny to me, because I don't have severe sensory issues, executive dysfunction, anxiety, or depression like many people on WP, but yet when it comes to social awareness I'm such an aspie I can hardly believe it. It's like I've been in my own world, completely isolated from everyone else. I just never knew it until I took a small step outside of my world. I think I often overestimate my normality, until I remember that normal people actually are aware of and care about these sorts of things.
Now, since widening my awareness seems like a daunting and impossible task, I almost think it could be better to continue to be oblivious. I think that's why a lot of aspies seem to have more issues than me. It kinda goes along with the idea that "what I don't know won't hurt me." I'm so clueless when it comes to this stuff that it has almost no effect. Whereas many aspies mention being "trapped" behind a glass window, unable to interact properly, I'm the kind of aspie who doesn't even realize that there is a piece of glass there. That's just how immersed in my own world I really am.
Well, I "missed" a bunch of stuff in these social areas and just like you "oblivious." I remember reading a post about ADHD folk in that they are/can be "self absorbed." A neighbor once was a little annoyed because I don't notice anything in the neighborhood. He said, "pay attention, I mean there are other people around you."
I have gotten "self absorbed" feed back even in my late 30's.
I didn't have
real "executive function" issues, anxiety, etc. until completley out of school as when living alone and keeping up with a faster paced traffic, than I was designed for.
Something to think about: All these areas can be " non Aspie."
15 Aug 2011, 12:49 am
