Imitating Values

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I noticed a little something in my psychology studies on supposedly normal people. If you frequently voice your views on some basic common subject without comparing it with how they feel, they will sometimes make completely false value statements about things in their life to the same point.

I have a very convenient test situation in my home, as my dad is always stating his views about things on and on without caring what anyone else thinks. My grandma is usually his audience, and she is rather normal, but lacking in many mental capacities as is common in the elderly. I am very clever at watching her and seeing what her values and morals are when she speaks, as it is one of my obsessions. Whenever she tells someone what her values are, she is always repeating the value judgements of the person she is speaking with. I have tested this extensively as I only tell her that I value the truth above all things. She thus deftly only tells me that she hates when people lie to her.

My dad, who probably has AS, and I am pushing him to get diagnosed with me, is completely unsuspecting of her ruse. Being obsessed by certain social situations as I am, I tend to spy on people having conversations, and so I listen to my grandma's views on the world as it relates to her audience of the moment. I carefully note that she never states any value that her audience finds objectionable. As you know, different people have different values, and my grandma loves them all equally. When I overhear someone arguing about their values, I note the moral in question, and I wait for my grandma to speak on the subject. As I have stated before, her judgement is always in the favor of her audience.

Sadly, she doesn't have the facilities to comprehend my advanced moral reasoning, as it takes about an hour to explain each subject in a shallow way, most likely due to my AS obsession, and I never converse with her for more than two minutes at a time. In my minimally qualified opinion, this is how all supposed NT people keep their friends close, however in a far more complex way.

This is called being highly agreeable.

Arguably not to people with Asperger's. I keep having to explain to my dad, who I strongly believe may have it, that she is just trying to say something he will find to be morally agreeable. I've pointed out to him and had him witness with her on many occasions where she would make the opposite statement from what she said to him, but he refuses to believe it. Although it is immoral to the both of us to lie about our values, I try not to be offended by her blatant lies anymore, as it is just some supposedly "NT" behavior, and she is, as you said, trying to be agreeable.