What do you wish your teachers had done?

Post Reply New Topic

I am a elementary general education teacher and I am trying to create a classroom that is respectful and supportive of students with ASD with no bullying. What did your teachers do that worked or what do you wish your teachers had done to help you?

take it seriously when the other kids were teasing me and treating me like crap and to do something about it instead of the "boys will be boys" attitude they had-it has scarred me to this day the way I was teased and the school did NOTHING about it.

I had a teacher call my mom in tears one time to let her know that there was bullying going on (and I was the target). Quite honestly, I don't even think I knew it was going on at the time, so I hadn't thought to tell anyone myself. My parents wouldn't have known about it otherwise. I'm glad the teacher had recognized it and cared enough to tell someone. It's hard for me to say how much it helped, but I think it might've gotten much worse had she not intervened.

As far as bullying "in the classroom" goes, my best advice would be to just take it seriously.

Use my special intrests to modivate me instead of trying to squash them or use them, don't encourage the other kids to make fun of me, realise my stims are there because I'm stressed or bored, don't isolate me. The worst thing my third grade teacher did to me was skip the chapter about animals when we had finnaly come to it. I had litteraly been counting down the days until we would get to it.

Take bullying seriously.

I wish that Miss Johnston had had a cougar crush on me, and then kept me after school for some special lessons.

Funny, I don't recall feeling all that 'different' in Elementary school, though looking back, I know that I was. It was the mid 60s and diagnosis was still more than four decades in the future. I have been told that I performed fake epileptic seizures in the aisles for laughs, and while I don't remember that (and had no idea what epilepsy was then), it fits in with my developing realization that using my oddness for humor was a way to compensate for my inability to socialize normally. I remember that starting school, I was tremendously excited at the opportunity to learn to read. I loved books.

Academically, problems did not begin to arise until 4th grade and beyond, which is about the same time that my social inabilities were also beginning to make me feel isolated (my parents of course had been aware of them for years). Math started to become a problem as things like fractions and decimals were introduced and the Executive Function required to decipher them became more demanding - my focus went right out the window - literally.

I guess it was on the playground my differences were most glaringly obvious, as everybody else would gather in groups and I went straight to the swings. Interacting with others was at best tedious and at worst demanding and confusing, and the rocking motion of the swings was soothing. It dissipated all that anxiety from having to sit in the middle of a bunch of people for hours. When I did play with other children, it was to play 'house' with the girls - but not as the 'daddy' - as the pet monkey. Even the idea of pretending to be a grownup felt uncomfortable.

Occasionally a teacher would organize a kickball game and insist that I participate, but I was too awkward to play well and only got bullied and humiliated as a result. Plenty of movies and television shows have depicted that iconic degradation of always being picked for a team last, but while may it seem amusing in retrospect, at that point in your life, it defines you. It tells you without doubt who you are in this world as others see you. LAST. The loser.

So in a nutshell, that was Elementary school for one kid with autism, who didn't know he had autism. What could my teachers have done? I really don't know. I can't think of a single thing that would have made life significantly easier, or changed in any way how things turned out. But maybe you can see some clue there, After all, I used to think I was normal and it turns out I was the only one who thought that.

Believe students and parents when they say that they know how to do something already even if its not something that people tend to be able to do at that age. Go ahead and test if they do know how, but don't ignore them and just call them liars.

Don't assume that because someone has difficult with something, they have difficulties with things related to that (i.e. because someone has difficulty speaking, they have difficulty reading). Again, if there is a way to test, that's good, but let people prove they can do things that they can do rather than not giving them this chance.

Both of these were big problems for me in elementary school. I had speech problems, could completely not pronounce certain sounds, so couldn't pronounce certain words. My teacher decided that because I couldn't read out loud I couldn't read at that high of a level, while I was actually reading at a much higher level than that. I also went through math much faster than the elementary school expected, as my special interest is math, and my parents were accused of lying about me knowing how to multiple and divide and such.

Encourage your students to correct/question you. Not only do we love doing it, it will engage others to pay more attention.
Don't make us read outloud or solve problems on the board unless we raise our hand or something, otherwise we're a nervous wreck.
In math don't make us "show our work" if we've proven we can do harder work in our head. Chances are there is no work for us to show cause it's automatic to us so we don't know what you're talking about and the time it takes us to fake it we could do 5 more problems.
Group activites are nightmares for us. Can't really tell you not to teach that way but... just keep it in mind and don't hold it against us.

depending on what grade your teaching it might be good to show a short documentery about ASD and if it's ok with the kid/kids with ASD, tell the whole class that they have it. that will hopefully help the kids understand them.

Also if you have computers in your classroom and there's ASDs with bad handwriting or they just love computers have them use them for assignments. I carry a laptop around school and it helps.

Although if you make it a requirement for students to show stuff to the class don't make it necessary for the ASD kids. If they seem discomfortable ask them what's wrong and see if they want to go somewhere quiet to work.

If you have the kids take notes then maybe have someone else give them notes or give them a copy[better to do this if they also have ADD/ADHD].

I have more but i don't want my post to be really long. i'll post more later or you could PM me.

They should never have TOUCHED me although they knew how much i hated it!

But they forced it on me as if it was their body, not MINE!

I need one arm's length distance at the very least and feel threatened if someone does not respect my aversion to physical contact.

However, things grew much better when i was removed from public school.

school is utter dog crap, sorry but you will still have to teach the bs curriculum and the mob will still rule.

Conformity is king at school, you all stand in line and wear uniform (one-form.) Only if you can think as a member of the herd, aim towards a pre-defined role within the great and unquestionable society that surrounds us, and parrot everything that the teacher says, will you be happy and successful at school.

Some aspies don't mind reciting vacuous "facts" at school, and they can get good grades, but will still suffer social damage on the other hand. Unfortunately many of us have this horrible burden called individual thought, and don't necessarily accept something on account that it is fashionable, or decreed by an authority figure.

School is the very anti-thesis of what would be good and healthy for an aspie. What was required that I conformed to, was something that felt totally unnatural, and something that I struggled to understand. A good thing that could be done for children with ASD's at school is either to send them home to be home-schooled, or give intensive one-to-one tuition and isolate them as much as possible from the boring dreadful activities that all the other children have to do.

I really wished that autistic specialist schools were more accessible. There's no way I will ever send any of my children to a mainstream school.

If you have a smart kid, who appears to do well at everything, then for no apparent reason is struggling with one particular task, don't assume they're not trying. This was me, top of the class or thereabouts with most things. But when it came to reading within a given timescale, I just couldn't do it. The teachers used to scowl at me, as if I just couldn't be bothered and one ridiculed me in front of the class. And I still remember the disbelief on one teacher's face when he saw my attempt at wiring a plug. Mind you, I left school 20 years ago. I would hope that teachers these days would be more aware of what might be going on (it's the case in my daughter's school anyway)

And, if you see any bullying or name calling going on, don't ever just ignore it. One of my teachers told my parents at parents evening that she felt sorry for me, because of the other pupils. But, at no time did she ever discipline any of them. In fact, she even asked me to inform her if I thought one of the boys had been taking drugs. I was totally petrified in that class and now I was expected to be a mole as well (I never told her anything). That was my worst year at school.

We had country dance lessons in the few weeks before Christmas each year. If you do anything like this, don't ask them to pick a partner. Give them a number instead. That way no-one is last to be picked. And swap them around every dance. So, if they feel they're unwanted by their partner, then at least they only have to put up with it for one dance.

I realize that the educational system is what it is & conformation is king, but this is the one time in life that all kids are supposed to excel in every subject equally across the board. This is a big pet peeve for me. Please recognize that even young children are better in some subjects & not others. I would like to see kids encouraged in the subjects they do well in, & for the ones they don't...while it's good to encourage kid (making a mockery of them is a horrible idea or singling them out in front of the class because of something they did/said was wrong).

Also do take bullying seriously. If a child appears withdrawn & doesn't interact with peers, don't just put on a report card that "so & so" doesn't get along with other children. Check into why this is happening. There's usually an explanation for a child's behavior. Also kids who are being bullied might do any of the following (besides being withdrawn): have anxiety, not want to be at school, act out due to anger &/or frustration, cry inconsolably, seem depressed, want to be left alone/do his/her own thing not what the class is doing, talk out of turn, lash out at other children, etc.

1) Don't make assumptions about the social needs of students with ASDs.

If a kid spends all their time alone and you're concerned about it, don't assume that they are unhappy and then try to force them into friendships before you talk to them to find out how they actually feel.

You could tell them you've noticed they do lots of things alone and say something along the lines of, "Some kids like to spend lots of time alone, doing things by themselves--other kids don't really like spending time alone and would rather do things with other kids. Are you the kind of kid who likes spending a lot of time alone, or would you like to spend more time doing things with your classmates?"

If they want to be more social, try to engage them in a conversation about why they aren't....different reasons for not socializing call for different solutions or advice: "Nobody likes what I like" means there is a need to identify or build common ground; "Everybody makes fun of me" probably means you need to put a stop to bullying and go from there; "I don't know how" calls for giving a child ideas and scripts for interaction with others.

Alternatively, you could teach the entire class about the different ways that people develop friendships and introduce them to the idea that some people like to be with their friends a lot, and some people like to be with their friends only a little bit of the time.

In any case, don't force a child with ASD to socialize with their peers during leisure time--if they want to socialize more than they do, offer your help and let them decide if they want it or not. Forcing a child to socialize will likely make things worse.

2) Teach kids that it's possible to say and do hurtful things without meaning to--that what one person finds hurtful is not always the same as what someone else finds hurtful. Try to facilitate understanding when there's conflict and hurt feelings between kids, instead of just handing down a verdict about the situation.

Bullying situations can start when one child reacts badly to the actions or words of another child who honestly meant no harm--the child who reacts badly is seen as "weird" and aggressive and becomes a target for bullying (from the perspective of the other children it may not be bullying, but a sort of self-defense or "counter-aggression")

The above is especially likely if the child who feels hurt asks a teacher to intervene and that teacher declares to all the students involved that there was nothing to be upset about--the teacher is probably going to be seen as "taking sides" (by supporting one child's perspective/feelings and dismissing the other's). The student who complained may conclude that teachers don't care if they're bullied, and see no point in asking for help if other kids intentionally hurt them.

You can't force kids to understand or accept perspectives other than their own, but you can model such acceptance yourself by explicitly showing empathetic understanding of perspectives you do not agree with when mediating disputes.....and in doing so you could prevent bullying and/or the escalation of conflicts between your students.

These were some of my experiences (I was, and still am, undiagnosed):

NEGATIVES:

-In 9th grade, I corrected my English teacher's spelling, and she became very angry. She had it out for me after that point. In 12th grade I was in her homeroom class again and attempted to apologize for my behavior as a freshman, but she thought I was being a smart-alec and had it out for me again. I had been elected student body president* and she tried to get me suspended, because she knew the rules, and being suspended got you kicked off the student council. Fortunately, the principal knew what she was trying to do and prevented it.

-My 5th grade teacher complained to my parents that I read too much (!?)

-I talked to the counselor about a bully and he really didn't do anything about it.

*- The odds of an aspie being elected student body president are dismal. This is how it happened: I ran for student council as a class representative and came in 7th place. However, during the year some of the winners were suspended and kicked off, and I was promoted instead of another election being held. Knowing I would never win an election for class president, I ran for student body president instead. For my speech, I showed everyone how to vote for me, using a giant pencil. My class overwhelmingly voted against me, but the outgoing seniors and incoming freshmen who didn't know me thought this was hilarious, and I won by a plurality of 8 votes (maybe 40 percent, 3-way race.)

POSITIVES:

- One of my science teachers got angry when I instantly turned a paper back in, but was surprised when I made a 100. After that, she basically let me work at my own pace and play games, etc.

- Although I conflicted with some of my teachers, others gave me a chance because I was smart. Their investment in me was the "networking" that I needed...I now work in the school system because of their recommendations. If not for this, I probably wouldn't have a job, because I really suck at interviews, especially phone interviews. I also have a house, because one of my former teachers thought of me when they got ready to sell it. My wife, who is not really NT, also has a job in the system for this reason. While the majority of my experiences in school were negative, I really have beaten a lot of odds because of the things my teachers did RIGHT.