Feeling loved

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When you are in a partnership or with family can you sense their love for you or do you need them to tell you they love you?

Or rather can you read if someone loves you without them telling you directly?

love to me is kind of intellectual. So people who can intellectually stimulate me are the ones I feel close to. but my issue is trust. I've been bullied during childhood and cheated on by almost everyone I befriended I just feel paranoid about relationships. I guess I am not very good at reading what someone might be feeling about me. It takes me a very long time to trust someone but then again I've also been misled by long term friends. I guess to feel that I am loved I only do with family and the closest of friends (2 I've known since I was a kid).

I guess to me love is explicit words or action. If someone tells me, it doesn't mean a lot. It's a formality. It's what people do.

Mostly, the whole topic is kind of confusing.

I can sense love from my family & the two girlfriends I had but I liked when my girlfriends told me they loved me because I really liked being emotionally close & feeling intimate with em.

I think I can feel "love" only in its romantic sense, when I've fallen in love with someone. I love my parents mostly intellectually, and some of my relatives perhaps more emotionally. I know I have the strange feature to feel "hidden love" for someone (a bit cold at the surface but deeply felt inside), so I guess it is the way how I feel for my parents. It seems a bit difficult to feel love for my sister, with whom I'm not on good terms, unfortunately. I don't think I love my friends, rather I trust them and like them.

I am clueless when it comes to 'reading' a person's love or interest in me. Sometimes it is quite hilarious when I realize just how clueless in retrospection.

People have to tell me or explain how they feel for me to know what their emotional alignment is. When someone has told me that they love me I take them at their word and then change the status of their 'file' in my brain. From there out I assume the status to be the same until that person informs me of an emotional/affiliation disposition change or a huge amount of evidence/behavior builds a case for a reevaluation.

Willful and persistent naivete makes me interpret all actions of those that claim love or friendship with near complete trust. All the while, what a person says regarding their feelings towards me prevails, sometimes to my utter destruction, as has been the case in several abusive relationships. Fortunately, most people that have said they loved or cared about me have been telling me the truth (or, at least I have no reason to believe otherwise).

I cannot feel loved.... I have to take their words and then examine their deeds and weigh the evidence

I feel loved when I can say anything I want, and it's OK.

I don't need or want others to tell me that they love me. Hearing others tell me that they love me is extremely awkward for me. My extremely awkward reciprocation of others telling me that they love me is extremely awkward for others.

By my family, I know that I am loved. For me, it is not a matter of sensing or thinking or feeling. It just is.

You would know it. Saying it means nothing.

Oh, I missed the question...

To be honest, I have problems with sensing love of others towards me, too. Sometimes my parents make it hard, especially my father, who is very likely a semi-Aspie or Aspie. My mother is better at expressing her love for me, though I found out early in my life that I don't feel loved when they are angry with me for whatever reason, mostly if I've done something wrong.

I guess I totally sucked at my ex gf. She's never really loved me, although I thought she did. Probably she wanted me by herself only as an extension of herself, an object, a property, a precious bird, no more. She said she loved me "by her mind"...

In my experience most humans are so damaged they're incapable of love. If everyone is saying it, and your culture keeps pushing it, don't let that confuse your instincts if you can't feel it. You'll know it when it's real.

Same here.... I didn't even "take people's words for it" until I was in my late 20's. I decided "ok, if he says it, I'll believe him until I get proof of the contrary and stop analysing every freaking thing".
Turns out I shouldn't have. It's always better to be skeptical, in my opinion.

I feel and sense the love from my family.

As for anyone I've ever been with...not so much.

Why don't you all see? Why can't you see it? We're all one, and connected by unconditional love. The WHOLE UNIVERSE is made of unconditional love. It's all love, all of it. You'll never be alone, because we are all one.

I cannot sense it, I am always doubting about that and anyway I always think, that people are rather mad at me or find me weird.