Probably what I have the hardest time with are the contradictions. The positives and negatives. One end of the way or the other. You have to be one thing or the other. What if you're in the middle? But what is the middle if everything supports one another such as 20-80 and 80-20? Mind-splosion, I know.
I've always felt I've been different. Hard time with friends, explaining myself, etc. My family has always been that way.
I've always been okay, it didn't matter too much, because I could survive. My parents could help me out. However, recently we've had a kick in the butt with the economic issues, and they can't help me any more. So, I turn to ask for help, which is hard for me in the first place.
Those programs, food stamps, disability, medicare, all take action and going out of comfort zone, and sensory overload. New things, more places to go to, etc. etc. Then they make it so difficult to get onto it and do it all with the paper work. It's like they are saying "I want to help, but not really; so I'm going to make this as difficult for you as I can". A smile but with gritted teeth. I can't work. Too much. Jobs I did have, I'm surprised they didn't fire me earlier than they did. Got lucky, I guess.
Been looking over website and forums, debating on posting, or what. Heart's racing. I think this makes sense, but then I know it doesn't. More contradictions. I don't know. Can anyone give suggestions?