Argument with the olds

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I'm flustered about this. 41 yo and arguing with my parents about me, my older brother and everything in-between. Why does it have to be this way? Can't I just tell the truth about my life and have them support me? I guess not. But my diagnosis begins in a few days and I need their support,

Is your family totally against the idea that you might have AS? I don't know why it has to be way, but this seems to be the way it almost universally is. It doesn't make any sense to me.

If you live alone, then tell them to leave you alone.

Well I lost the plot for the last few days after that argument, but somehow I've held on enough to get to my WAIS test today. The psych was puzzled with some of my performance - blitzed several parts of it, as she put it and she said I got further in some of the "symbol" tests than anyone else she'd tested.

So come home from the 200km trip feeling both tired, and elated at my performance. But after tossing up with the notion of telling my parents (I never told them I was going after the last argument), I decided to and another argument began. I told my mother about it and expecting that would be the end of it (or maybe she'd congratulate me for taking initiative and doing something on my own?), she commented that I'd been through all this before and it never went anywhere. I explained that the last WAIS was done informally by a psych doing his thesis on AS and I was just a guinea pig. She continued saying this over and over with me explaining she had it wrong every time, even after I'd grabbed the Victorinox and it was a coin toss whether I did something with it around my navel region or not. The argument revolved around the fact that nothing had come out of these psych appointments before, and that if I have such high intelligence why I don't have a job.

Anyway I need my parents to support me in this. There is no maybe. My employment agency is paying for these $800 of tests. I will be ringing them on Monday and saying until someone can talk to my parents about what I'm going through with all this, I'm not doing any more of the Dx process (speech therapist etc).

If anyone has any ideas on what I can do for this situation it would be greatly appreciated. After 41 years of hating life I'm out of answers, and out of patience.

HalibutSandwich, could you say a little more a out why is it so important to you that your parents support you in your diagnosis? Is it that you rely on them for financial support (that's a tough one) or are you looking for emotional support / understanding / a true connection with them?

I ask this because you may not get the understanding that you are looking for from them. It may develop in time but equally it may not. My parents and I were simply not a very good fit, that isn't necessarily anyone's fault, it just happens sometimes.

Arguing about your condition won't help but it will completely exhaust you if it continues indefinitely. You are looking for a diagnosis so I think you should carry on with it, with or without your parents' approval. It is obviously something that is important to you, and it sounds like you've waited for a long time.

If you depend on them financially that is a tough situation. I'm guessing your parents expect you to earn or somehow contribute to the household income. If they have financially supported you so far then I'm sure they will let you stay on until you find your feet whenever that is. Just don't expect too much on the emotional side, they simply may not have the capacity to truly 'get' you. You will find other people who will 'get' you.