So now what?

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Basically, I've done this evaluation and it said that I have the met the qualifications to have ASD... I have to contact the evaluator to get some more information on the specifics and help me understand it better, but as it stands now I kinda just have learned to accept this.

Now what?

I mean, I'm 19 years old. I'm looking at this and seeing that I have a LOT more problems than I was even aware of. I mean, some of the problems I thought were pretty small, some I didn't even know existed at all, and it's just kind of embarrassing. Especially when you're told you're whole life that you're capable of overcoming them, you're just being lazy or whatever.

It honestly feels kinda bad. I mean, I didn't lose any friends or anything and most people think I did the right thing but I just feel like crap because of it. It's kinda "taboo" in our household for some reason, I think because mom thinks its overlabeled or a conspiracy or something, I don't know...

I mean, I bet a lot of you don't feel like that but it's just troublesome to me.

Meanwhile, dad doesn't really get involved, but mom insists that it's wrong to label me as something, and that it's just because I'm gifted and that's why I never developed a lot of social skills. She's kind of hard-working with me trying to get me a bit better but it's really tough and veeery frustrating, especially considering she won't hear me out and kinda ignores some things to fit her theories. I think she's trying to help and is just against the idea though.

But where do I go now? I mean it's kind of a cold new world out there.

It was nice coming on here to see that a lot of people share a lot in common with me though. Reassuring.

Well, what do you seek? Find a target, and shoot.

Good advice. Your evaluation hasn't changed you – you still have your gifts. You just need to find a way to use them. It can take some time, so don't give up if you don't find it immediately. I had to work in a boring job for four years before I found something I really wanted to do, but I don't regret those four years. I learned how to function in the workplace with all the unfamiliar rules and made a couple of good friends, and it takes me longer than most to work out my own desires, so I needed that time. Whether you want to look for a job, go to university, or volunteer in an animal sanctuary or on an environmental project....just work out what that first step is if you can't find your target straight away.

One thing that could help with your parental situation could be to have your parents speak with whoever it was that gave you the evaluation/told you you have ASD, and have them tell your parents why you have ASD and to go through all the stuff they should know, etc.

I would suggest giving your parents time, because they're still just human beings and human beings can have a hard time integrating a pretty massive bit of information into their world view.

When I told my mum, she changed the subject immediately, and I knew that meant she couldn't cope with the idea, so I left it alone. A week later I printed out and showed her the cartoon that's stickied in the general discussion forum; she read it, said it was interesting, then changed the subject again. It was 6 months till she could say the word and we've yet to exchange 2 sentences on the subject. But hey, that's cool, the diagnosis of Aspergers didn't even exist till she was well into adulthood. Not only that, but Mums tend to take things personally when it comes to her children.

Give her time- it may take weeks, months, years or she may never come to accept it. Either way, don't let it impede your own exploration of your new identity or moving forward with what you want from life.

I relate to your shock. There is shock. I spent a lifetime thinking I was some sort of willful original, then, voice to skull, I discovered myself as a list of criteria. Where's the agency in all of this? Way harder for your parents who probably feel implicated in something unknowable. You are still you, whatever. Think of all the fun you're going to have getting to know yourself.