Do female aspies have an easier life in society?

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I could care less about being pretty.

I've seen you say this many times. Have you considered talking to a professional about transitioning?

I don't expect, need, or deserve an answer to this, because it's about you and only anyone else's business as much as you want to make it anyone else's business. But if this is something that is causing you actual distress, it's definitely worth consideration.

I know what you mean.

If they do, I must of missed out on the memo. :/

I believe women in general have an easier time in American society and probably human society in general. A woman can simply 'play dumb' and she will still find someone who will take her in romantically and pay for all or most of her wants. Men don't have quite that luxury.

As far as whether women find life easier or not, I don't know.. I suppose it could be emotionally taxing to feel you have to always pretend to be dumb in order to have a relationship. And if you don't want a relationship, the pressure might be greater on women to find one than on men.

As far as having all your basic physical wants and needs taken care of, though, women in general definitely have it easier.

Why is that a "luxury"? If a woman has to be in a relationship in order to be taken care of, it's just a polite form of prostitution. What's so great about that?

I would say it is not easier. Being born a woman and being born autistic has been both places of extreme positive passion and extreme pain. I was not diagnosed until the summer I turned 21 and by then, I had already been sexually assaulted three times (at the ages of 16, 17, and 18) and had been in a sexually and physically abusive two and a half year relationship with a man who saw my meltdowns as reasons for cruel treatment. I have since learned from kinder men that I did not deserve it; however, my re-education was disturbed by another man who believed that I did...

I was bullied constantly in high school and when I was sixteen, after I was successfully preyed upon by my teacher, I went from being known as the weird Unicorn Girl to the Psycho Whore and I gained stalkers, harassers, and a rapist. I had been hospitalized twice and arrested once (meltdowns have the appearance of "tweeking on drugs") all before I was diagnosed...

Even still, even after my diagnosis, though, I have learned how to manage my meltdowns a bit better, I still deal with the feeling of noises being hurtful, of certain textures making me want to claw my skin off my body-- I occassionally wake up to bleeding patches due to an itchy blankety-- and the constant distress, as well as the social confusion that autistic men go through. On top of this, I have been sexually assaulted three more times since my diagnosis. All three of them were in 2018... Two of them, my first semester at University... I still have so much trouble believing people will have bad intentions... I want to believe that they are good, that when they want to show me a Fine Arts Garden in the middle of the night, it means I will see statues. That when they agree we will only kiss, they mean only kissing. I want to believe that people will not touch me while I am sleeping... I want to believe they people will see my body that is frozen without reaction, that has become stiff and confused and robotic, that they will see a body that only wants to be a ball, a body weeping and heaving, a body that is silent and not see a body they can take... I want to believe this... I want to believe that I am not prey... I want to believe that me being who I am, believing the world is magical, is not part of the formula for the "perfect victim"... I want to, but it is so so hard...

So no... It is not easier... As autistic children, we all experience the same risks, boys and girls... As we grow older, autistic boys risks change-- in fact, they become more likely to become perpetrators than victims due to sexual fixations mixed with an inability to understand boundaries (however, most autistic men, I like to think, are not sexual predators and better than their neurotypical counterparts)--- yet, ours, ours stays the same... I am just as confused by the world as you are... Yes, I can speak. I am verbal. I am a lover of language... but I have trouble talking to people, understanding when they plan to hurt me...

I am among them and I will tell you it is not easier... Also, we are more likely to experience comorbid mental illness alongside our autism... There is a price in appearing "normal" when you are so far from it, so far from the world...

I think what you are saying is very harmful to autistic women everywhere and I have no idea why you are a forum modifier...
This is hurtful and harmful to autistic women who find themselves moving from man to man, unable to take care of themselves and unable to make healthy social bonds, and are frequently abused and hurt by men...

I am not sure if you are being sarcastic as this seems to be something out of a woman hating book or if this is how you really feel about yourself... I always feel like I have to prove my worth to people and have let people sleep with me because they were kind to me... If you need to talk, I am here... Just know that what you are saying is damaging to women like me and every woman on this forum...

You have made me feel like trash, like nothing, with your generalizations about autistic women based on your experiences... I am sorry if someone hurt you, but someone hurt me too... Many people hurt me... but I am not belittling all autistic women... I am encouraging them and loving them and wanting them to be heard and seen as human and not some socially confused and socially manipulative Eve... Also, where did you learn how to manipulate? Autistic people rarely ever attain this ability to such extremes you are discussing... I can only try to manipulate people once I tell them I am manipulating them... Sometimes my meltdowns can be manipulative, but it is mostly trying to get rid of the thing that upset me whether it was the changing of plans or the prospect of moving or transitioning from one place to another or being confused by what someone was saying or the place where I sit everyday in the cafeteria is taken... but not that, not using people, hurting people... That is not autistic behavior...

I was being quite heavily sarcastic. I'm sorry you felt like trash, you don't deserve to feel that way.

I liked your post and got you as being sarcastic. But I'm NT once it comes to language and for this I understood this. (Even that English is a foreign language to me.) But I have learned that many autists who are a bit more on the spectrum have problems to unterstand sarcasm, irony and other forms of verbal indirectness. It's because they have problems to understand that language is also used to cause emotions within other people and to express emotions beside the words. Let's use your post as a sample.

You felt bitter and annoyed about the question. For this you ironically told how easy your life always is once it comes to things that anyone knows that you have to struggle with because you are a aspie women. You assumed that anybody knows that life isn't this way and that anybody would know that you were just kidding because the question made you bitter.

SweetOnSylvia didn't understand that you were joking about clichés because the question made you bitter. She has problems to understand nonverbal emotions and indirectness in language. Her way of thinking and feeling is a lot different and for this she couldn't understand you because any kind of indirectness requires that the opposite is mentally the same way as you are. But I'm sure that she is able to learn to understand. But the only way to learn this is learning by doing. She needs to talk a lot with nice people who don't judge her because of her problems in understanding nonverbal stuff in language and provide her the chance to learn this by explaining all the minor things that she does't gets right. I think here are many nice people who could help. How about this Silvia?

I've told people that with the stuff kids do nowadays I'd probably be in prison for murdering my child if I were to have one. I even told mom that my sister should cut off my niece and that she should cut my brother off and she said she's not nearly as heartless as me to do such things.

Ditto on all 3; in fact Who_Am_I's post made me laugh

I just have trouble understanding sarcasm and idioms. Sarcasm, originating from a phrase meaning "cut throat", is a deliberate verbal falseness used rhetorically or for humor or for cruelty, yet, it is spoken as if it were actual... Idioms are generic phrases such as "give me a hand" or a "down to earth girl"; yet, though they are highly visual, they are not meant to be image-based, but supposed to be immediately understand outside of their visual aspect. There meaning is understood socially not by any analytical or associative methods. I can read poetry all day dissecting the various divergent metaphors, the weight of connotations behind each word and word pairings, of what is meant when a line breaks, what phrase remains after the breakage. Poetry contains a higher emotive trace behind language than everyday verbal indirectness such as sarcasm, idioms, and hyperbole-- however, I do prefer hyperbole over all spoke indirectness... My social deficits have little to do with deficits in language--- I see language as something that can be eternally constructed and eternally deconstructed... Truth runs in both directions...

Also, it is Sylvia-- I love Sylvia Plath...

No. They just tend to have different struggles than male aspies. I really don't like comparing which group has it "easier" or "harder". Can't we just admit we both have difficulties and hardships?

Imho this question will hardly receive a conclusive answer. What I heard about ND females is that they are more difficult to diagnose because they tend to blend in more easily.

However, whenever I come to this forum I see female aspies struggling with the same kind of situations that any male aspies are facing.

So it's hard to tell what's right, what's wrong and who is absolutely faking a serious condition so that they can belong in a niche group where they will receive free attention.

No.