Adult Diagnosis - Who did you tell?

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I've just been formally diagnosed with asperger's at the age of 45.
I was wondering whether to tell my mother or siblings. .. And,if I do, HOW?? :-S
I'm sure there must be people on here who've gone through this dilemma.
Any advice?

I went through it, at only a couple years younger than you. Tell only the people who need to know. Those you interact with daily who you love and who need to understand your behavior. You got by this long without explaining, and probably pulled off the eccentricity thing well so far, so no need to change it now.

I told my immediate family and over time a few close friends. That's all. I do not want to be treated like I'm five years old which is what I'm afraid will happen if I tell others.

I'm a very competent housewife and mother of four. I cook, clean, chauffer, am the house nurse for the sick, bake bread, plan meals, do the shopping, pay the bills, mediate the arguments, etc, almost exactly as an NT would. I'm just eccentric about certain things. Thats all.

I also live in the Deep South where by a certain age (ours) you should have some eccentricities anyway, so it's fine now.

I made this thread a while back, Web Page Name, you might want to check out some of the answers I got there, but I still have not come to any conclusion myself.

My parents were involved in the evaluation process (ADI-R), so they must have a clue by now.

Seriously, my immediate family knows and my closest friends (two ppl) also know it. I widened the circle with one further friend recently, extremely careful. That's all. I also find it difficult to disclose it to any other person, including my relatives, and especially my workplace. I don't need further trouble resulting from general ignorance and I don't need being treated as an incompetent (5 yo) person.

Edit: I don't have Asperger's. I think some of us on the spectrum don't have one either, so I haven't voted.

I was diagnosed when I was a few years older than you. I told members of my family but some of them still don't believe me. It appears they are confused by the fact that I have a type of High Functioning Autism. They tend to group the word "autism" as being somewhat of a basketcase and totally dependent on someone else. I have also told some of the people I work with. One of my main motivations for this was to explain to these people why I am a 50 some YO man and I'm not married. In general I feel I have a responsibility to inform others that autism is not a dirty word and all people who have autism are not incapacitated by it. (socially maybe but not intellectually)

If I had a diagnosis of anything, I'd totally tell the family, hoping that they would stop trying to force me to correct my personality. We've been fighting over my odd behaviors and different way of thinking since I could remember.

I would never be able to talk about it beforehand, though. My parents would blow me off as lazy or worse. The problem is, I am not financially independent and I don't know if I would be able to bring the discussion to my GP, whom I haven't seen since 2008.

When I received my diagnosis, I put it into the hands of my father, he read it, and declared from now on I have a right to slam doors (referring to a recent episode). Just make sure I don't do it when I'm with them...

I was diagnosed at 47. Since both of my parents are dead, it's really a moot issue for me. But to answer your question, it is no. After the way my parents treated me, I wouldn't talk to them for any reason. I haven't talked to any of my siblings in years. If you had better experiences with your family, it's probably a good idea to tell them.

I was diagnosed about a month ago at 27. I haven't told my parents because they don't believe in anything that can't be proven with a blood test. However, I did tell my mother-in-law. My in-laws have basically adopted me so I thought they should know. She is studying to be an occupational therapist so I actually gave her my full psych evaluation to read.
I told one of my friends but he works with autism spectrum kids and young adults. I want to tell that rest of my husband's family because I think it would make family gatherings a lot easier but I'm not sure how to do it.

I told one parent, and a couple long-term acquaintances who I felt might provide some important feedback. Interestingly, no one was particularly surprised.

Thanks psychegots. I did a search before posting but the search engine here is obviously not very good at ranking results:-}
I've since read the useful responses you received. I've also just found a book on amazon called: "Coming Out Asperger: Diagnosis, Disclosure and Self-confidence" which I'm thinking of buying

I'm worried my mother would do a wobbly into feeling guilty... And then go consult her 1950s medical encyclopaedias:-S -she's done that before with other people and told them the prognosis as if it was still 1950:-@
But... I'd like to know if she had been told something by our family doctor YEARS ago... or if I'd only imagined that piece of overheard conversation(about AUTISM - this was the 1970s):-}

I'm 43, diagnosed a couple of months ago, I told my parents and siblings. Nobody was surprised. The only difference now is that they have stopped nagging me to be all "huggy' and instead of thinking that I'm a loser for not getting anywhere career wise they're just happy that I support myself.
I would be fine telling everybody if the stigma wasn't so weird.

Lol that sounds great

I tried to tell my mum, but she is denying the diagnosis. Refuses to believe it and tries to put my symptoms/traits etc in other boxes. eg. anxiety, depression, shyness\social phobia.

The issue I have is that she was barely present in my life as a child (either working or sleeping), and has some ASD issues herself. I know this now because ASD has become an obsession of mine and I've done so much research. I hate to think what would happen if I pointed these things out to her......

I gave her the Tony Attwood book to read.......

Yes, I told my parents I had Asperger's right after being diagnosed as an adult. In fact, they knew beforehand I suspected I had Asperger's. As the OP suggested the telling of parents was a dilemma---it was not a dilemma for me. In fact, I have also told fellow workers and acquaintances when the proper moments come about. And I also tell people I have Asperger's that attend my dulcimer ministry concerts.