Years later you figure out what it means.........

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Hey guys,
I'm trying to start an interesting theard and myabe doing that would entail, telling childhood stories where you as and aspie, or autistic. took something literally and out of context, and then later years later, you discover what it actually means. I'll give you and example.
Mine begins back in 6th grade, I knew I was slightly different, but this was years before I was diagnosed with AS.I was always farther behind in the culture of my peers, specially when it came to sexual or subliminal things.

I remeber at recess one day, some girl, I wouldn't call her a bully off hand but she liked to make others feel awkward, came up to me and asked "are you straight?" I looked at her as if she was insane. What? I asked. She repeated the question again.
Now I am not homophobic in the slightest, I fully support LGBTQ rights, but at that time and place I knew nothing about homosexuality much less what being straight meant. I though straight as in a straight line, so I answered "NO" thinking it was impossible for me to be a straight line? what kind of dumb question was that? She laughed hysterically and ran off. The next time someone asked that I answered "yes" because I though that was the right answer. But they ran off laughing again.

Now 2011, I understand what it means, but I was confused for a while......

Haha, yes. Whenever I heard someone say "This game sucks!" I literally thought they meant the game sucked on something.

That's a very interesting story, layla87. Luckily I was never asked anything like that, but until a few years ago I would have been as stumped as you. It's very annoying that she would have asked you the question in the first place.

Anyhow, I remember a few times when I misunderstood expressions and my response would produce some funny effects. I think it was my birthday and my mum wanted to "toast me", as in, toasting to my celebration. I thought this was related to toasting, as in, toasting bread, so I said, "Don't toast me!"

Ah, part of me wishes I was like that and that young again.

The first time I heard the phrase "gay bar" I thought that it was some kind of candy bar I had never heard of. I was in high school, so it was only a few years before I found out what gay bars actually were.

20 years ago, my ex (not ex at the time) called me "independent as hog on ice." I asked her what it meant and she just said it meant "really independent." I only recently found out that it actually means something more like "you're trying to be independent, but it's not doing any good."

This one's not about being literal. Instead, it's about something that happened when I thought I was reasoning out correctly what an unclear saying meant and then discovered I was wrong. I often try to figure out stuff myself, by intellect, so that I don't have to ask people all the time when I don't get something. I just pretend I get it until I can reason it out or go look it up. So much for that! Here's what happened:

I originally thought that, if something "ran on God's time", it meant it was happening at arbitrary times when nobody could guess it would occur, because people always talked about how mysterious God was. So, when the bus wasn't on schedule day after day, always being either early or late by some amount of time I couldn't predict, I commented to someone that it ran on God's time. That's when I found out I was mistaken, because she seemed to think I meant it ran exactly on time, every time. So, I learned that's what the saying really means. But it was a very awkward moment.

One time, a couple of guys in my middle school science class asked me if I had a Quarter Pounder. I thought they were asking about the McDonalds burger, so I told them, "no, I don't have a quarter pounder". The majority of the students in class started laughing at me. I didn't know why, so I shrugged and went about my business. Later that week, I told my twin brother (who's NT) about what happened. He was laughing as he said, "dude, you just told everyone you don't have a dick!". I was humiliated.

You know those car jacks, the ones that hold tires up? When I was 11 I had a friend a few years older than me. I was helping him replace his dad's tires, and he was suppossed to go get the car jack out of the nearby shed. When he showed up twenty minutes later without the car jack, I asked him what took him so long and why he forgot the car jack. He said, "oh, I was jacking off" as he burst out in laughter. I didn't know what that meant back then, so I said, "can I join you?" [help him find the car jack]. After I said that my friend was laughing so hard his face was a bit purple.

Just as an interesting bit:

Lambda Delta Lambda is a real, queer and trans-friendly sorority, although I think they accept all sexes and genders:

http://daviswiki.org/lambda_Delta_Lambda

I first came across them in the late 80s, I think they were mentioned in a lesbian magazine I was reading at the time.