How do you get along with other Aspies?

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Who do you get along with better?
I get along with Neurotypical people better. 14%  14%  [ 7 ]
I get along with Aspies better. 58%  58%  [ 29 ]
I get along with both equally. 28%  28%  [ 14 ]
Total votes : 50

PersephoneX
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12 Jan 2012, 12:18 pm

Truthfully, I generally fancy them more than NT people. I connect with the eccentric mind in a deep way. I love to discuss philosophy and science with a "specialist". My interests seem more broad than many, thus I can usually enjoy their trip for awhile, unless it's mechanics or writing computer programs. Machinery bores me and I don't have a foundational knowledge of computer programs. .

Even before I knew I was an Aspie, I always managed to make friends with other Aspies, even lifelong best friends.

I have had NT friends as well and in fact have at times enjoyed extreme popularity, but the truth is, I would get exhausted after awhile and become a bit reclusive for a period which they found perplexing. I would make plans and then not feel like it when the time came, generally due to erratic sleep etc. I'm not really flakely but I get how it might seem that way to someone who doesn't understand.



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12 Jan 2012, 12:29 pm

I get along with aspies better-its like we speak the same language and do not have to translate things to talk to each other like when hanging out with NT's


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nemorosa
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12 Jan 2012, 12:41 pm

You missed out the option - "I don't know any aspies"



PersephoneX
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12 Jan 2012, 12:42 pm

nemorosa wrote:
You missed out the option - "I don't know any aspies"



Awww. Sorry about that. Point taken.



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12 Jan 2012, 1:01 pm

It entirely depends on the person (and that's not at all the same as equally).

Of the two people who've hurt me most, one of them is an aspie, the other isn't.
Of the two people who I've been closed to in my life, one of them is probably a spectrumite, the other isn't.



Joe90
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12 Jan 2012, 1:02 pm

I get along with NTs better generally, especially older NTs. But I think I get along with Aspies who are my age. There should have been an option saying non-NTs who aren't Aspies either, because I have a few friends of my age with other mental disabilities but aren't on the Autism spectrum.


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Dunnyveg
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12 Jan 2012, 1:05 pm

PersephoneX wrote:
Truthfully, I generally fancy them more than NT people. I connect with the eccentric mind in a deep way. I love to discuss philosophy and science with a "specialist". My interests seem more broad than many, thus I can usually enjoy their trip for awhile, unless it's mechanics or writing computer programs. Machinery bores me and I don't have a foundational knowledge of computer programs. .

Even before I knew I was an Aspie, I always managed to make friends with other Aspies, even lifelong best friends.

I have had NT friends as well and in fact have at times enjoyed extreme popularity, but the truth is, I would get exhausted after awhile and become a bit reclusive for a period which they found perplexing. I would make plans and then not feel like it when the time came, generally due to erratic sleep etc. I'm not really flakely but I get how it might seem that way to someone who doesn't understand.


Persephone, I've never actually sat down face-to-face with another apie either. With this in mind, I do connect in some ways better with aspies than I do with normal people; there is that implicit understanding you allude to.

OTOH, I wouldn't want to be in a romantic relationship with an aspie. Having a normal woman in my life helps compensate for my weaknesses, and vice versa for her.



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12 Jan 2012, 2:13 pm

I can get along with both, however it is MUCH more difficult with NT's than with other aspie's.


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PersephoneX
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12 Jan 2012, 5:54 pm

Dunnyveg wrote:
PersephoneX wrote:
Truthfully, I generally fancy them more than NT people. I connect with the eccentric mind in a deep way. I love to discuss philosophy and science with a "specialist". My interests seem more broad than many, thus I can usually enjoy their trip for awhile, unless it's mechanics or writing computer programs. Machinery bores me and I don't have a foundational knowledge of computer programs. .

Even before I knew I was an Aspie, I always managed to make friends with other Aspies, even lifelong best friends.

I have had NT friends as well and in fact have at times enjoyed extreme popularity, but the truth is, I would get exhausted after awhile and become a bit reclusive for a period which they found perplexing. I would make plans and then not feel like it when the time came, generally due to erratic sleep etc. I'm not really flakely but I get how it might seem that way to someone who doesn't understand.


Persephone, I've never actually sat down face-to-face with another apie either. With this in mind, I do connect in some ways better with aspies than I do with normal people; there is that implicit understanding you allude to.

OTOH, I wouldn't want to be in a romantic relationship with an aspie. Having a normal woman in my life helps compensate for my weaknesses, and vice versa for her.



I am married to an Aspie, in fact :D We get on just fine. I force him to make the phone calls. lol :P That's an LOL. I can make phone calls if they don't involve making small talk with strangers.



jmnixon95
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12 Jan 2012, 6:10 pm

Depends on the person, really.
Just like NTs with other NTs.



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12 Jan 2012, 6:46 pm

I went to a monthly autistics meeting for a while. It was okay. But I found autistics (or at least those who visited the meeting) weren't necessarily easier to approach than people who aren't autistic. I thought it would take away a lot of barriers, but I sometimes experienced some fundamental problems in communication anyway. I'd sometimes listen to someone rant, and out of politeness I didn't want to interrupt, but it was difficult to get a word in edgewise. I didn't slack my attention toward their story, however.

Irony demands that in the past two years, the two people I've had the most comfortable interaction with (both at work), were extraverts, the opposite to little old introverted me. Quite the opposite of autistic in every way. My best friend is on the spectrum, however, although he's very mildly affected and chooses not to self-identify as autistic. He just has the diagnosis, but he mainly chooses to not label himself as autistic, and it works out for him.


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PersephoneX
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12 Jan 2012, 8:11 pm

CyclopsSummers wrote:
I went to a monthly autistics meeting for a while. It was okay. But I found autistics (or at least those who visited the meeting) weren't necessarily easier to approach than people who aren't autistic. I thought it would take away a lot of barriers, but I sometimes experienced some fundamental problems in communication anyway. I'd sometimes listen to someone rant, and out of politeness I didn't want to interrupt, but it was difficult to get a word in edgewise. I didn't slack my attention toward their story, however.

Irony demands that in the past two years, the two people I've had the most comfortable interaction with (both at work), were extraverts, the opposite to little old introverted me. Quite the opposite of autistic in every way. My best friend is on the spectrum, however, although he's very mildly affected and chooses not to self-identify as autistic. He just has the diagnosis, but he mainly chooses to not label himself as autistic, and it works out for him.


Wow, I'm proud of you. Ranting is not easy to listen to if it's not a subject of interest. It's imperative for Aspies to learn that every story and subject has a beginning, middle and an end and look for cues of boredom in the listener.

A bore is someone who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.



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12 Jan 2012, 8:16 pm

PersephoneX wrote:
A bore is someone who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.


I like that a lot :)

I don't know many Aspies, but I do like them better. I do get on well with NTs, and the vast majority have no idea that I'm not NT- they just think I'm "unique" or "interesting" or "dorky" or "awkward".



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12 Jan 2012, 11:30 pm

It varies from person to person, regardless of labels.

However, I prefer to spend my social time with specific types of NTs (mature, creative, openminded ones), as I feel like they are on the same emotional wavelength as I am. It's a feeling you can't explain in words...our conversations flow and things just feel right.

People with AS, in contrast, are harder for me to relax around as they are not as emotionally expressive or in touch with their emotions...and it's harder for me to know if they are feeling a certain way or not. The way I am trying to buffer this is to find commonalities between me and the person with AS and focus on the mutual things that draw us together.


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My diagnoses - social anxiety disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder.

I’m no longer involved with the ASD world.


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13 Jan 2012, 2:05 am

Although I've never (that I know of) met another Aspie face-to-face, from my online interactions with people here, I'll say that I'd probably get along better with other Aspies.


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13 Jan 2012, 12:25 pm

To the best of my knowledge, I have never met IRL another diagnosed Aspie. I have met some people who have enough Aspie characteristics that I asked them, but if they were they didn't know it either, not even self-diagnosed, and to a couple I had to explain what it was that I was asking!

However, WP feels more like "home" to me than any other place I've been on the web, including e-mail communities that I've been with for about 15 years. Just the whole _concept_ "wrong planet" (or "Alien in the Playground", one book about it) strike very strong chords for me.


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