Not fooling people as well as I thought???

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One of my husband's friends is a child psychiatrist. For whatever reason, my husband decided to tell this friend of his about my AS diagnosis. I almost reamed him good after he told me, but all is forgiven at this point. I called her to make sure she didn't disclose it to anyone else in my husband's family, as she is in contact with my sister-in-law from time to time. I specifically told my husband NOT to tell anyone else.

Anyway, on the phone, this lady tells me that I really shouldn't worry about telling anyone because it wouldn't come as a big surprise to anyone (in my husband's family). I was like, Huh? She wouldn't elaborate much on the point, so I had my husband call her up and find out (since she called him up after she and I spoke). Apparently, there was nothing in particular she could pinpoint but given that she has been practicing psychiatry for many years, she was able to pick up on "things" in the way I handled social situations that led her to come to her own conclusions about me. I asked my husband if she said she specifically suspected AS before she had been told of the dx, or if her hunches that something was "off" was *confirmed* by the AS dx he told her. My husband didn't think it was an important technicality to ask her about, but of course I disagreed with him. He said it was the "gestalt" of my behavior that she as a seasoned professional was able to pick up on. This is immensely frustrating for me because I really would like to get specifics, because she might be misinterpreting other things going on that might have nothing to do with AS at all.

Ugh, I hate when sh!t like this happens.

A "child psychiatrist" is not a "people" so don't be paranoid that everyone is noticing how weird you are.

My NT wife watched me take the AQ test and corrected my answers several times, raising my score. "I don't really do that, do I?" I would ask. "Oh yes," she would reply, "that's you."
But she is my wife, not "people" either--she knows me through and through.

I've had near strangers pick up on my quriks, inquireing to those close to me. I used to ask my family who knew about my aspergers to not tell anyone, the responce was always people can tell your a little different, your not fooling anyone. My act was not very good it appears. Its not a big deal to me anymore, knowing may help my relations with others including making friends and thats good, its also easier to let someone else tell the story.

NTs never want to give specifics, or to hear them. Don't they know it's ALL in the details??

I have a friend who said her first impression of me was that I was autistic. Her mom works with autistic kids. Also, when I was a teenager someone who worked with autistic kids told me that I reminded her of the kids she works with at the school. Yesterday I was talking with a friend about school. I mentioned I should have been skipped a few grades academically but placed with younger kids in PE, and that I thought I was never skipped because schools don't like to do that. She said that it was probably because of my social skills. Others have also indicated that they have noticed my social skills are not very good. I do try to act as "normal" as possible but fail. I think the reason I can't pull off "normal" is because I really don't have a good understanding of what normal social skills are. I can't appear to be NT because my concept of NT behavior is limited.

I'd be highly surprised and maybe even insulted over a psychiatrist I spent time around not picking up on me having autism or at least recognize something along those lines.

I think a statement that everyone must know is way too broad. But I'm sure people detect something different. That's a very NT thing to spot differences. There are hundreds of beloved personalities in this world who are different, unique, unusual etc. Being different isn't always a stigma. A lot of times it's an attribute. There are a couple of people at my church whom I'm pretty sure have AS. They are both very well liked by everyone. I know they are both viewed as a little different or unique. But that difference/uniqueness seems to make them more endearing, not less likeable.

As for me these days I almost flaunt it. I think people appreciate honesty and candor in others. I think some women actually admire my being different and I think some guys who are slaves to being as conventional as possible might be a little envious. Then again, I'm sure there's a few people who don't like me and maybe find me weird or creepy. But then again, there's a few NT's I don't like and consider weird or creepy.

I think it was Judy Garland who said, it is far better to be a first rate version of yourself, than to try being a second rate version of someone else.
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A few weeks ago while chatting with my MMO guild/group/etc., one compared me to Rain Man.

Aside from that, people pointed out to my mother that I was autistic when I was fairly young, and for diagnosis, the paperwork said it was fairly obvious. When my therapist talks about dealing with other autistic people she tends to clarify "not as severe as you" although I am not sure if she refers to visible appearance or actual impairment, but still.

I don't try to hide it, it's not a mystery to anyone, and no one in my life was surprised to hear it when I brought it up.

I think the problem is that most NTs are too polite to say anything in case you have not realised it yourself.

But if you bring it up ... it's I thought that as well (but didn't want to say anything).

Its much harder to get the truth out of NTs.