The reason I needed to find this out about myself

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I have felt in myself that I really wanted to be able to define myself as Aspergers or somewhere on the spectrum etc. Part of it is, it was nice to see a group of people who deal with some of the same benefits and drawbacks to a similar form of difference. It was nice to be able to see similarities in people off this website in my own behavior that I never saw before. It was good to group together about 75% of my personal struggles into a single bundle that might make me normal in a different branch of diversity. However, now I have seen my first real benefit.

I still have to do more experimentation, but I think I may have finally figured out how to shop!

Today for the first time that I can remember I spent an hour and a half in a crowded WalMart and the biggest thing that threw me off was getting a phone call on my cell phone. I actually came home feeling happy and proud of myself (rather than stressed and ready to collapse as I usually do).

For me, a crowded store is the ultimate sensory overload for me. There's too much to look at, there are people who cant seem to understand organized movement talking and mumbling chattering on cell phones and just making crowd-hum which I cant stand, and on top of all of that I have to be able to find the items I am looking for and get them into my cart while dealing with all of that. Eariler, I had watched the hour and 12 minute Temple Grandin video that AardvarkGoodSwimmer posted in the parents section and she had mentioned suggesting a child wear sunglasses and being able to go from not lasting 5 minutes in a store to being able to shop for an hour or more... I decided to give similar a try.

My biggest sensory issues are hearing first, and eye movements second (I am starting to discover that I dart my eyes so much that they get sore)...

So I brought my phone with headphones and plenty of Hardhouse (quick and rhythmic electronic music with predictable stimulating elements) downloaded... and wore sunglasses. I found myself needing to apologize less, I was able to focus on what I was there to buy and how to get it rather than the people and noises around me... I was sort of shopping like every one else was...

In fact it went so far, that I even noticed someone else super stressed out in the store having a hard time! I am never calm enough to be empathetic in a store! that part was great!

So I have found possible new treatment for myself... things I can do to make life more comfortable and as a result I am very excited.

(btw, the bad part was when I had a phone call and it stopped my music and all of the sudden I was in a aisle with people all around and needed to get out so I could answer the phone and I freaked for a moment lol)

Has anybody else has similar breakthroughs when finding out more about the autism spectrum?

Yes

I actually DO wear sunglasses in stores and I have never even seen that video LOL. Not always, been on days with a lot of overload.

I am not self DXed, but I first had the breakthrough in 2010, around June.

ASD has explained A LOT for me, and i have to say it was my obsession for a good 6 months, I even contemplated seeking a diagnosis.

But, I realized later that although I do have traits (more than most people) and that what I have does affect my functioning, it's just not the same level as AS. Possibly somewhere on the spectrum, but I think I'd have a hard time getting a DX.

So, I think myself as NVLD now and on the BAP, for sure, but YES, so much has been explained for me.


Now, I feel justified in kind of...using coping skills, I guess, like what you were saying, and now I know what they actually are and don't feel weird about using them because I know what I'm experiencing is real.

I thought I had something *nobody* else did for most of life.

Yeah, I've felt that way about all the other mental diagnoses that I looked into in the past, share a lot of traits but not quite me. ASD reminds me more of how I was growing up than how I am now but its still me.

I like the idea that I potentially can improve my life with little discoveries like today's

I'm ADHD by DX (medicated and everything ) - just about every one of my cousins have either ASD (DX'd early) or dyslexia. My doctor, when I lived in Florida, suggested I get evaluated for ASD but I've never had the right set of circumstances to pursue that (have no insurance and can barely afford what expenses I currently have).

I figured out basically the same routine with shopping you outlined, though - headphones and familiar music... something to focus on, to restrict sensory input at some level or my anxiety just goes through the roof. I also found that having a list and calculating totals as I shop (w/ out a calculator) helps immensely because it engages my mind around the sensory input (if that makes sense). I've recently started calculating taxes, as well, but I think that's more a natural product of my tangential mind. I can't help it.

Congratulations!

For me, since I've suspected AS, I've been more aware of how much time I was spending at work (art is my job and one of my interests), so I've been curbing it a little....no more staying at work until midnight, or working through the night.

The worst was when I've worked through the night and people started showing up the next morning, and I'd still be sitting at my desk from the day before.

My hours are supposed to be 9-5. I've been doing double-time days without overtime pay for the past 20 years. Now I'm down to between 10 and 12 hrs a day.


Music is very helpful for me too, especially when I'm working - it drowns out the office chatter.

I'm familiar with overworking... oh lordy, do I do that a lot.

Last job I had, somehow, I got promoted to supervisor (looking back on this with horror, btw...) and I'd come into work on the weekends, unpaid, and stay from open until close just working on projects I was worried might not be done on time otherwise. My boss absolutely loved me.

I hear ya on that. Yup - worked weekends too.

I was forced into a management position a few years ago because of my seniority; those few months were sheer insanity. I can not manage people, and I don't like it (hate is the right word). I begged for a demotion and was so happy to get back to my old job. Just me and computer working on a juicy project.

Kestrel,

Another thing that I found a long time ago that helps is to prepare a shopping list in order. So I am mostly a visual thinker so I can do a store runthrough with an empty store in my mind and figure out where everything is as long as I have visited the store before.

goodwitchy,

It's good to keep control on that. While it may be less risky to cause emotional burnout since it is an interest, it definitely puts you at a risk for physical burnout.

kestrel,

Supervisor x.x strangely enough I have pursued leadership positions in my company in the past. Luckily for me there haven't been any in departments where I am familiar with the work being done. I stopped seeking out that sort of position nearly a year ago when my job became even more math / logic intensive. (better fit)

I am currently a salary employee, but am pretty good at balancing my time. In fact, I tend to keep a tally in my brain and try to stick as close to 40 hours as possible.

infinitenull, that's good advice.
One of my problems is also that I don't pay attention to the time when I'm working. The saying, "time flies when you're having fun" - yes, it does. I always get lost in projects, especially after everyone else leaves the office.

Math is definitely a weak subject for me; I can't add in my head like you can. I also find lists very helpful.

I think I'm a visual thinker? When I have to go somewhere, I go online and get pictures of the area - like on googlemaps. That also helps calm a little of my anxiety because I tend to get lost very easily. (understatement of the year *lol*)

I am horrible with basic math like adding and subtracting. However I am actually good with algebra. Which I guess is rare for visual thinkers because its abstract. But I just see boxes that have undefined volume... I can arrange and understand those boxes on a very deep level

My visual concept of my username is actually almost cartoony... I picture poorly drawn black holes (null) lined up in a 3 dimensional endless grid (infinite)

I love the idea of an infinite volume of the lack of a container for "nothing" to even exist.

Null is a deep concept as well since null cannot be zero because null cannot = anything at all... null doesn't even equal null lol