How to handle meltdowns

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I'm new and just learning that I am not the only one whose world collapses when things don't go the way I need them to. How do you handle it? I was hospitalized one time because thew mowed on a wednesday, they normally mowed on tuesday's (ret*d, I know, I just absolutely did not know what to do).

The only thing I've been able to do that helps at all (though it doesn't prevent it, just ensures the consequences aren't so dire) is get the hell away from other people.

I agree with mds 02.

Last night, my boyfriend and I had plans to go pick up takeout thai food and come back to my place and watch a movie. Well, he was running late and texted to ask me to call in the order for us so he could just pick it up on his way over.

It was only a small change of plans and I lost it. I started sobbing uncontrollably and had a horrific panic attack. Fortunately, he was running late enough that I had time to meltdown for an hour before calling in our food order (I don't like talking on the phone and the phone lady at my favorite thai place has a thick accent which makes it worse. If I am face to face I have no issues with accents...just on the phone.) and everything worked out fine in the end.

The point is, being by myself was important. I just had to go through my breakdown-rebuild myself process alone. Other people get freaked out by watching this happen. I usually stim by rocking back and forth and making lots of tiny braids in my hair to break the meltdown cycle and this makes other humans...even other Apsies nervous.

I just saw this... sorry!! ! ***they

Yes, just being alone and in complete silence helps me the most. The less stimulation around, the better.

I think that the only realistic thing is to try and remove yourself from the situation. I usually have problems only if someone prusues me when I am trying to withdraw from an emotianal situation. And then I REALLY do melt-down or shutdown.

Sincerely,
Matthew

Interesting Matt62. In NT culture, if a friend (especially a romantic partner) bolts, the "correct" thing to do is to go after them.

A good example of how good intentions and a lack of understanding could cause someone to do exactly the wrong thing.

^this.

A shot of Ativan and 4-8 hours in restraints is the only thing that does it for me. Mine are usually in conjunction with a Bipolar episode, so it's usually been building for days and I've already tried all my aversion techniques, and I know ahead of time I'm going to lose it (self-injurious behavior, etc.), and I can get to a hospital. I've been hospitalized about 10-15 times now.

^ lol!

I used to only meltdown once a year when younger. As I'm getting older I've been melting down quite often but can hide the symptoms ... my worse one was at a job that I was stuck at quite far from home. I could hide my face with gear and clench my hands onto objects to avoid people see me shaking. It also helped that my partner was having issues with panic attacks, and had mentioned it to me prior. Everyone jumped on me that morning for having ear plugs in my ears during a meeting. But I was already overloaded and put the earplugs in to lower my sensory intake.

That caused yelling and scolding... so I melted down quickly.

I've asked for and was givn a dozen or so 5mg Valium incase this happens in the future. It would be better to be drugged because after melting down I'm usually feeling horrible for a week. Although I haven't tried one yet.

I am learning to nurture my 'overmind' that looks at all the stuff my emotional mind is doing from some distance and analyzes them logically.. from a rational perspective, my emotional states always seem silly. The tricky part is getting the overmind in there in the first place.. but, as I engage this technique more and more, it becomes more natural.

Things that used to annoy me simply don't anymore. Things that used to make me really angry/scared (negative emotions are always based on fear) only make me sort of angry. Even if I don't consciously invoke the overmind it's still there making things less intense.

And yeah, getting away from stimulation in general is the best choice, but in today's society, and maybe ever since consciousness first existed, it's not always practical to just run away.

mglosenger:

Please explain what an 'overmind' is. I have an idea but would like clarity.

I reallly like that word, hope you don't mind if I use it. I like to 'watch myself think' and 'overmind' is a brilliant word to encapsulate that.

Like others here, I need to meltdown away from people; I have too much ego to allow it to blow around others, but if anyone ever saw it, I have no doubt I'd end up in the psych ward.

So these are the tactics I try to employ to mitigate their awefullness:

*Becoming mindful of the buildup - difficult, and I'm still working on it.

*I've noticed that my meltdowns work like a shallow sine wave - when it's at a peak, there's nothing that can be done, but my overmind needs to be aware of when I'm in a trough, so that it can implement strategies.

*The best 'trough' strategy I've found so far is to visualise a very large dog sitting beside me, completely calm. In this way I can 'feed' off the calmness. It doesn't make the meltdown go away, but it becomes easier to deal with.

*Get under a weighted blanket. They're amazing, they really are...

And that's all I have at the moment.

And I completely agree with Matt; if someone's trying to calm me down pre-meltdown, or wants to come after me to make sure I'm okay while I'm attempting to make an escape, it's likely to make things a lot worse.

Last edited by Nikkt on 05 Mar 2012, 5:55 am, edited 1 time in total.

Having a few drinks listening to trance music and layin down somewhere in complete solitude.

This. I leave so I don't explode at others. I try to break down where nobody can see it.

Get away from people and find inanimate objects to kick because actually kicking, throwing, releasing all that anger helps. Bottling it up like I usually do when around people just doesn't feel healthy. I will always eventually explode. It's getting harder and harder to hold back lately.

I lay down and listen to music too but it's usually by my favourite late folk singer.