Quiet & Loud

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I am definitely a 'loud' aspie. I say the wrong thing at the wrong time often, just to fill the silence as I have nothing else to say. This makes me look really stupid to people around me and I really dislike it, but it is an instinct to me as soon as I don't have anything to say.

I don't like looking stupid and written examples show I'm not, but is there a way to fix this? To override my instinct to shout out and look like a fool? I'd much rather say nothing and live in my thoughts like I do at home but at school I just can't manage it.

My mom's husband is like that. It's as if silence makes him uneasy.

I understand. And I don't know what to say. I was like this for a brief period in grade school. Very hyper and talkative. But I grew out of it and now live inside my own head.

I am quiet. I still say totally inappropriate things though, all the time. It's just I say them more quietly

I have in the last few years taken it for granted I will say stupid things all the time. The way I see it is if someone can't take or takes offence then I probably don't want to be "friends" with them anyway.

I occasionally have this problem where I will laugh or put non-word sounds (just noises) into silent parts of conversations. I had much less control over it when I was younger.

I would say I tend to be both quiet and loud - I either tend to stay silent, or I can't shut up.

I agree with this, in two ways. I am like that myself when I'm with people I'm comfortable with but that are not my close friends, and I don't mind if they don't like it. Also, I like people who are like that and I find it easier to interact with them than with other people, at first, so I'm living proof that there is someone who will accept this behaviour.

Yeah, im a little clumsy loud. Quiet until you get to know me though.

I'm weird. I've been told I'm too loud if the environment around me is really quiet, but I'm quiet if the environment is really loud. I talk in a quiet voice around family and certain friends. I say inappropriate things and do random stuff from time to time, but I'm very reserved around people I don't know that well. I don't know how one goes about getting like this, or even if it's a preferable way to be. I can't really help it - it's just how I am, I guess.

I'm quiet when I'm out, and although I feel awkward when it's all silent with other people in the room, I still stay quiet and hope someone else will break the silence by starting up another conversation, because I don't want to look or feel stupid.

But when I'm at home, I hate sitting in the living-room with both my mum and my dad, because they don't talk to eachother much. They're not in a relationship any more, they just live in the same house (financial reasons) but there's often awkward silences when they're both in the living-room, and I have to get out otherwise I will go mad. I sometimes say little things just to break the silence and get them to talk to eachother, but in the end my dad just yells, ''can you be quiet for a few minutes?!'' which makes me feel like I'm some sort of hyperactive freak who never shuts up, so that is why I just leave the room before I do anything else to make me feel stupid.

Funnily enough, you can have better conversations with my dad when he's been drinking, so that's the only time my mum and dad do sit down and have a chat. When my dad is sobar, my dad has normal conversations when he's with other males, but he doesn't seem to speak properly to women.

My dad is neurotypical, by the way. That shows that not all neurotypicals are social perfectionists.

I am like this ("quiet") because of language/speech difficulties and a lot of people think that I'm cognitively challenged or rude and ill-mannered.

People treating me as if I had a low intelligence and therefore treating me as if that meant I was below them or otherwise in need or a teacher and a good lecture is the worst aspect about my autism in social situations. Even when I am able to interact just fine, too many people will try to hinder me.

So, I suggest striving for middle-ground between "loud" and "quiet" as that would likely yield the best results.

I'm Quiet when I'm out or around people I don't know but I can be loud at times.