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madmick
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22 Mar 2012, 9:18 pm

I have moved into my own house and a neighbour is making my life really difficult. When he was getting to know me he could see something was different and invited me over for lunch. He played church music while I was there. That was uncomfortable. Afterwards he was asking for large sums of money for helping me. I gave him small amounts to help him buy cigarettes. Then I got fed up with him asking for so much so I told him no. The other day I was coming home and the lane was blocked by a car. I pulled up behind on my motorbike and the car suddenly reversed into me. I ended up knocked out with the bike on top. The guys from the car helped me up and I thought it was an accident. Then someone set off their car alarm thru the night and next night someone tied their dog to my wall and it barked for about an hour at 3 in the morning. I feel quite nervous as to how far this guy will go. I think he wants my wife and I to move out. He lies outrageously and doesn't think that I have any rights. I told my boss at work and he said that I was just over reacting.



Pandora_Box
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22 Mar 2012, 9:57 pm

Why did you give him money?

I would have told him no and to leave me alone. In now way did you owe him any money and if he didn't have enough money to support his own habit you shouldn't give him money to support his habit.

And I wouldn't have even went to lunch with him either.

Sometimes stranger danger is always still a little helpful.



questor
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22 Mar 2012, 10:34 pm

Right now you don't seem to have much proof that he is behind the harassment, but I am sure he is. If anything happens that can be pinned on him report it to the police, and have a lawyer send him a letter to the effect that you will sue him for harassment. But you need to be able to pin some stuff on him before you can do that.

This guy is definitely trouble, so you really should consider moving out, and do tell the landlord why. Maybe he will have more luck with a lawyer and the police, since his livelyhood is being threatened.


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Callista
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22 Mar 2012, 11:28 pm

Hmm... well, yeah, I can see how it could be harassment, but I also can't see how you could prove it.

I suggest you keep a notebook of all the things he's doing. Don't spy on him or anything, of course; just write down things. Facts only.

Some of the things he did sound perfectly normal. Playing church music, having a car alarm going off, and having a barking dog in the apartment may be things that are annoying to you but that he doesn't think of as annoying.

Still--the incident with the car, and the asking you for money--that sounds very odd to me. Something has to be going on here, and it's really pretty mystifying to me.

Did anybody report the accident to the police or insurance company? Since there was an injury (you got knocked silly, apparently), someone should have.

Is your wife NT? Can she read anything off the guy that could be helpful?

Between the two of you, I hope you can figure out what's going on. He could just be a mooch who thinks he can take advantage of a naive neighbor, or there could be more to it. I hope there isn't; I hope you're not in any danger. But his behavior is pretty odd and it seems like something you should be wary of. It doesn't sound like any sort of normal NT behavior to me, anyway.


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pianorak
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23 Mar 2012, 5:13 am

This, and worse, happened to me and my children when they were quite young. The police took the offender's side, and even lawyers and a court case didn't help, so we moved house. It all starts again wherever we move to, so we've given up moving! Sometimes, standing up to them is important.



madmick
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23 Mar 2012, 5:43 am

I live in a 3rd world country. There is a strange law that works here. I am considered a gringo and someone who can be tapped for money. There is no insurance on the vehicles. The police like to get involved if there is money present. A friend nearly had her arm macheted off and her husband lost an ear to the thug who wanted to rob them. They had to fight to get the guy in jail as he had a relative in the police force. The country works quite well in some ways. I just feel a bit vulnerable just now and stressed.



Mummy_of_Peanut
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23 Mar 2012, 6:50 am

You definitely sound like you've been taken advantage of. But, from what you've said about the area, it doesn't sound like the police would be too helpful. If it was here in Scotland, I'd suggest setting up a covert video camera, to record any incidents. The police would take that sort of evidence seriously here, not so sure about the court (I have heard of a recent case where video evidence was presented and the judge dismissed it). Do you have to stay there? Sorry, but if it was me, my only answer would be to get out of the place.


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madmick
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23 Mar 2012, 8:00 am

We just bought the house and have lived in it for 6 months. The guy in question wants to take it from us. Most of the people around here know that we are good people but I have the haters. I don't know why but some people hate me and make it quite obvious and you also get the people who do nasty things because they can get away with it. I feel that we made a mistake buying the house but it cost about 15000USD and with the world economy looking bad we thought it would be an investment. Went back to England for a couple of weeks recently and people were warning me not to look at the hoodies and chavs and seemed nervous being out in town.



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23 Mar 2012, 8:17 am

madmick wrote:
We just bought the house and have lived in it for 6 months. The guy in question wants to take it from us. Most of the people around here know that we are good people but I have the haters. I don't know why but some people hate me and make it quite obvious and you also get the people who do nasty things because they can get away with it. I feel that we made a mistake buying the house but it cost about 15000USD and with the world economy looking bad we thought it would be an investment. Went back to England for a couple of weeks recently and people were warning me not to look at the hoodies and chavs and seemed nervous being out in town.


Sounds like a isolated village type community behaviour & viewing you as a outsider & you just took a large dump in his area kind of thing. They normally do loads of things to try & get you to move, as you don't fit the criteria of they area.

I hate the hoodies & chavs & young people & old people & adults, attacking. All the attitudes of attacking each group is just getting silly. It's all the bad press that has caused it & the minority, police normally tell you to disperse these days even if your not doing anything. Everything is just getting out of control, some places the police already stay out of.

So your from England I heard tones of stories of people, thinking they invested in a good place. Some of them are shocking as they try & claim land or say your house is illegally built because you did not get the papers translated into your language.


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madmick
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23 Mar 2012, 8:39 am

You are very astute. I just did everything the locals way. Another friend did the same and he has lost thousands of pounds going thru the courts.
I just feel depressed that I had a pretty depressing upbringing; my mum dumped me as a baby cos I was odd and I was abused in foster homes. Then I was put in the air force and people tried to bully me. One night I was so scared I was sweating with fear. I have just bummed around since then and I got a sailboat and I tried hanging around the south Bahamas with my wife where nobody goes.
The fairy tale ended and we had to get back to planet earth. I feel like buying a gun and taking a few of the bastards out with me as I see no future.
I think the guy has turned my water off as I haven't had any for a week and the river is full. I am catching rain water off the roof.



Sickpuppies124
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23 Mar 2012, 8:43 am

Sounds like the bastard's on drugs.

Call the cops, get a restraining order and avoid him like the plague. That money was probably used for crack or something.



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23 Mar 2012, 8:52 am

Sickpuppies124 wrote:
Sounds like the bastard's on drugs.

Call the cops, get a restraining order and avoid him like the plague. That money was probably used for crack or something.


Guessing you never lived in a 3rd world country or know what it's like. The police are probably corrupt to the teeth. Scams are big business, it's where most of the scams online come from. Even I have not, but I know it is very different, laws.

Restraining orders probably don't exist?. Maybe studying the law might be able to help you or talking to the people who you have got a liking, to see if they can help at all.


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Sickpuppies124
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23 Mar 2012, 8:57 am

Didn't read everything but if you're in a third world country OP, maybe you should try to learn hand to hand self defense, or keep a weapon close by whenever you go somewhere?



madmick
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23 Mar 2012, 9:10 am

I thought about a pistol. I was a marksman in the air force. I went to the store and I have the right paperwork.
Another friend sold his boat to a couple of locals who sold tickets to get to the US. They pretended that a large power boat would pick them up outside the harbour. They left with a Haitian captain into a storm. 12 ft seas. The boat capsized in the sea and about 12 people died. The two locals did a couple of nights in jail and the Gringo was in jail for months as they milked him. He eventually found a female lawyer who he married and then he got released.
I have been told not to harm a local as the friends will machete me to death. I don't fancy that.
Over here the lawyers change sides, people are bribed to be witnesses. I have been asked to lie for a fellow Gringo but I couldn't. I am the last guy to ask.



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23 Mar 2012, 10:25 am

Have you thought about abandoning the place? Living with that kind of harassment can't be good for anyone.



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23 Mar 2012, 10:34 am

Your neighbor's a jerk. If it were me, I'd try to enlist the help of another neighbor or two. If this guy is doing this to you, chances are he's done it before and maybe it worked. Your other neighbors probably know about it. Invite them over for cookies and milk and learn all you can. Find out what he'll do next and let him know it's not going to be tolerated or you strike first.

You should have come to Southern California. Our real estate is at an all time low. It's warm here and we have lots and lots of laws to keep neighbors to themselves.


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