Did/do people ever lose patience with you?

Post Reply New Topic

After you were diagnosed, did they understand you better but did there still come a time when they get mad at you for your traits acting like they don't understand?


This has happened to me throughout my teens. My mother has gotten mad at me for my anxiety or when I react to change in their plan and be cranky about it and have a bad day. Also get mad at me for my OCD tenancies or when I get overloaded from too much noise and then taking off. I can also remember Dad barking at me saying things like "it's part of life, you have to learn to get used to it" "or "Beth, relax." I know there is truth to having to learn to get used to it because it is part of life and if I do learn to get used to it, I won't have anxiety about it anymore when it happens and be so stressed out about it and have meltdowns. But sometimes I just didn't want to hear it.


Now it doesn't happen to me anymore because I don't live with them nor with my brothers and they live on their own now too. But my husband never loses patience with me.

Yes.

I was turning 20 and my best friend wanted to go to an amusement park on the 4th of July weekend.

Holiday weekend= excessive crowds and it was going to be very hot those few days. I didn't want to go and she pitched a hissy fit. It wasn't like it was MY birthday or anything.

Yes, my boss just criticized me for an e-mail I sent to her that she did not like. She thought it was disrespectful, but that was not my intention. And, part of what is so interesting is that this happened last year, so I thought it would be good to give her the diagnosis because I thought it would make her more understanding. Since it has not, I am going to ask for work accommodations through the Office of Disability Services, even if it just means going to training. Because, unfortunately, I received a diagnosis from a psychiatrist who quit and my appointment with a specialist is not until late August. So, I am experiencing some frustration right now. I will just have to see how it plays out and hope it works out for the best.

Only my sister knows about my Asperger's, but they all know I've always had problems. I am in my 50s, and would still have issues with my other relatives if they knew about my Asperger's. NTs are usually not capable of understanding that you can't change into normal, that you are not choosing to be different--you simply ARE different. It's part of their herd mentality. They are uncomfortable around those who don't follow the herd patterns. They will keep trying to make anyone who doesn't follow the herd patterns change their behavior to the approved patterns. When they are unable to make someone conform to the herd pattern they tend to get upset, especially if the non conformer is a family member or close friend. That's because they naturally expect all their family and friends to be part of the herd.

I had a hard time dealing with relatives until several years ago, when I was finally able to live alone. Life is far less stressful for me and much more peaceful now. I get along better with my relatives now that I only have to deal with them once in a while, and then only for short periods of time.

I don't know of any way to get through to NTs to make them stop trying to force us into a mold that we don't fit.

Before diagnosis? Everyone in my family lost their temper with me at one point or another. They thought I was just being rebellious.

After diagnosis, everyone tries their best to be patient with me and I almost never get into arguments anymore. They understand that I'm not being rebellious, just that my mind works differently than theirs (and everyone else's).

Yes they do. All the time. And they do not believe me enough to help me find a way to get a diagnosis. I just fake it all the time. Run scripts in my head and pretend to do and like things, and respond by "M Hmm" and "OH" and "WOW" and "Okay" a lot when i can catch myself before I rattle.