Feeling out of place

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I even feel out of place on this very forum.

It's probably because you're new. The longer you stay here, the more you'll get used to it. I'm fairly new still myself. Welcome and don't feel too shy to post, I find that everybody is very nice here!

What makes you feel out of place here?

I am just afraid of putting my foot in my mouth like I always do.

Some of the things of have I have said and the situations I have been in over the years make me cringe.

I was bullied in school and I never got any help from the teachers.

I see racial minorities come into my country and anybody who says the slightest thing is worse then Hitler

I suppose I felt they got protection and special treatment and I did not that made me racist.

I suppose now I am finally accepting it is me who is not right in the head.

Right now I am depressed and I am rambling.

Aspergers test coming at the end of this month.

You and almost everyone else here. If you say the wrong thing by mistake and apologise then I am sure everyone will understand.



Me too. I'm sure everyone here has said or done things that they cringe about even years later. I've lost count of all the disastrous things I've said and done.



Me too. I didn't have any help either. Occasionally I feel a little resentful about not getting any help, because I wonder what my life would be like if I had managed to finish my education. It frustrates me that most people in prison in this country have a higher level of qualifications than I have. But I try not to think that way, because I can't change what happened now and I want to use my energy for other things than feeling bitter.



I can see how this would be misconstrued. Obviously you are not worse than Hitler. If it is legal for people to move to your country then they are entitled to do that. There is nothing wrong with worrying that there won't be enough jobs or houses to go around as long as you would feel the same if those people were the same race as you.



They probably don't get any more protection and special treatment than lots of other people. But when you are not getting the protection or help that you should be getting, it is frustrating to see other people seemingly being helped. It's important to remember that even if we feel unloved and unwanted by society, it is still unfair to project those feelings onto other people.



This can make you feel bad about yourself. I always knew the problem was with me, but now it has sunk in that I will always be like this, that I won't wake up one day and be like everyone else sometimes I feel a bit sad. Life is never going to feel easy and the rest of my life looks like an uphill struggle.



Well, you're in the right place.



You might feel better once this is over and done with and you know where you stand.

So you see boys and girls, as SilkySifaka so eloquently just pointed out, this is a place for all us misfits. (Her staring monkey avatar gives me nightmares, but hey...)

Ramble away, get it all out of your system, I enjoy reading these sorts of things because I can totally relate. I'm feeling rather down at the moment, and I sometimes think I'm the one who hates having AS the most out of all the members here (I think I am exaggerating but it seems this way). I just hate having AS so much and I don't know how to learn not to. I can't think of anything positive about my AS. Even my obsessions don't make it great to have, because my obsessions seem to invite more stress into my life, although at the same time I feel I need to have obsessions although I don't want to.

And that's another thing about me, I don't know what I want. If people look at me in a group, I get overparanoid and self-conscious and think the worst possible answer as to why they're looking at me (although the real answer to that is they're looking at me to include me), but my paranoid thoughts erase the truth. Then if people DON'T look at me, I still get paranoid thoughts (''what if they're not looking at me because they don't like the look of me and don't want to include me?'') Aggghhhh! Sometimes I wonder if this is another disorder that hasn't been studied yet, because it is SO weird, even for an Aspie.

Oh no, does it really? I can look for a less scary lemur picture if that would help. I can't really have a non-lemur avatar because of my lemur name, I didn't really think it through when I signed up

Edited to add: Voila! This will do until I can find a more suitable lemur. Usually I don't manage to give people nightmares unless they have actually met me, so best to try and keep it that way

A few very good replies there and I am very thankful.

I guess we all know how we all feel.

@SilkySifaka - a sifaka is a lemur? I didn't know. You can go back with your staring lemur picture. Don't listen to me! I just say some people's avatar's give me nightmares because they look scary. I don't actually get nightmares from them. The one avatar that WOULD probably give me nightmares is the one by mds_20, the one of the black skull with the white devil symbols all over it. Yikes!

Oh that? It makes me think of a Jane's Addiction album cover, I can handle skulls but I get creeped out by a lot of insects.
@OP I wouldn't sweat it all that much, maybe hit more of the Random threads or the noob section until you grok the fullness, BTW I myself have to take issue with a lot of 'newcomers' in the country; in some places it is against the rules for them to even be there, yet their enablers arbitrarily turn it into an issue of race. My own family is pretty diverse and includes one of these 'races' and be assured that these enablers do NOT speak for everyone in that 'race' but unfortunately they do have their agenda and the biggest microphones, truth be told these 'spokespeople' care little if at all about the 'poor workers' they claim to represent, hmm, sort of like certain 'other' activist organizations. But go listen to some Devo and that might help

What if you are "right in the head"?

What if you get to make that choice?

Yes they are a rare type of lemur, with white silky fur hence their name. I like them because they are quite vocal but they have a limited range of calls - which is a bit like me, I am chatty but with a limited range of subjects

I will maybe change it back in a bit, if you are sure that is OK. I like it's wee face.