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08 Jun 2012, 11:33 pm

I might be borderline AS, but if so, I've learned enough skills to adapt pretty well. I took the test but the results were equivocal. I suppose if I had taken the test at a younger age the results might have been a little less ambiguous.

I'm 59 yo and wonder if anybody here as seen the lessening of symptoms with age.



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08 Jun 2012, 11:46 pm

I wondered that too. When I was a kid I was TERRIBLE in social situations and got in a lot of crap in school because of how odd I was. Now I can say I'm pretty "normal", as I have my own car and am going to college and later university. I'm only 19, but I feel as though I mostly "grew" out of Aspergers.



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08 Jun 2012, 11:58 pm

Often the years I built up habits to undertake during social situations. So for instance: eye contact, I'd focus on peoples' mouths or us my awkwardness or gesticulations to my advantage such that I might avoid being outside of the social "sweet spot." I often excelled at securing for myself the social bench or the social sideline.

Over time my outbursts waned. I managed to turn my excitement about funny words or ideas or analogies, which I might blurt out randomly because they brought intense joy to my body, into a game that some of my close friends play called "nonsense." However, it makes me self-conscious at those rare times where I fail to manage my body and laugh violently at something others only find mildly funny. So often I might laugh _violently_ at a pun. Or jump with energetic excitement at a "bad joke" while others mildly chuckle, etc.

I don't count as much now, and I no longer play the "license plate game."

I've used "accessories" to tone down my finger flipping and popping and peculiar aimless hand "feeling." I wear a rubber ring to tone down the popping of my middle finger-right-hand.

I've learned through negative feedback not to let my rants go on for too long. It takes me a while to realize when someone is bored, but at the same time I converse with philosophers who are happy to listen to someone ramble. I usually notice that others might not be interested when they start yawning or moving somewhat uncomfortably. Years ago I'd talk for hours about some argument. So, for instance, I was fascinated with the Gettier Problem, and I'd tell everyone about it. I've learned to make less of an effort to sabotage conversation with philosophical puzzles I find interesting.

I believe Aspies, regardless of age, can learn social rules, but primarily indirectly, though time is a factor of learning. So, for instance, through roleplay.



Aspinator
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09 Jun 2012, 12:04 am

I am a 56yo and I was diagnosed later in life. Back when I was coming of age there was no such thing as Aspergers. If you are born with any type of autism you have it for life. You don't grow out of it, you just learn coping skills on how to get along. There are varying levels of Aspergers; I too have a college degree and I have a very good job for the last 12+ years. I also know some people with Aspergers that struggle with employment their whole lives and there are also some that can't drive. The one commonality we all have is that we "suck" in social situations. For whatever reason, we are discriminated against and that will never change no matter how mild or severe you have Aspergers.



vanhalenkurtz
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09 Jun 2012, 3:29 am

52 years old. My experience is not lessening w/ age. I now have less pressure to do the social thing and consequently do less. Never could drive.


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PTSmorrow
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09 Jun 2012, 3:50 am

I'm 53 and no, there was no lessening in symptoms, just the opposite -- well, kind of. I'm simply no longer wasting time with things i don't really want. When i was in my twenties it was more difficult for me to cut off people who were bothering me or say NO to an invitation without further discussion.

Another important point seems to be that there is much more awareness of AS in public now. Stimming, for instance, could easily be misunderstood if one did it at the grocery store. Meanwhile quirky behavior seems more acceptable. All in all, i can live much better with my symptoms since there's no more trying to influence me in some way.



League_Girl
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09 Jun 2012, 4:02 am

I was worse when I was a kid and I have gotten better as I got older. I think I have gotten better since high school. There are times I do get worse as if I am regressing to my old self and then I am back to normal again, my new normal. Often times I feel normal. As a kid not so much until I got to high school.


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Joe90
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09 Jun 2012, 5:45 am

I've got better socially. I used to whine and complain about everything when I was younger, and everybody I knew used to call me ''the moaning mini''; the teachers, the others kids in my class, my parents, my cousins.....everybody. Then when I was 16, a boy in my class said, ''stop moaning'' and I screamed ''I'M NOT MOANING!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !! !!'' because I got so mad with everybody saying the same thing to me. I got into trouble for screaming like that in the classroom (because that wasn't usually usual behaviour of me at school) and so I got sent to the office. But while I was sitting in the ''time-out'' seat in the office, I promised myself to cut back on the moaning when with other people - and it's worked. Now I only moan about things other people are moaning about at the time.

This has also worked with my obsessions - I talked about them non-stop to my ''friends''* at school, and one day they pointed out how worried they were about how obsessed I was, and I realised how annoying I must've sounded and got upset with myself. So I taught myself to keep the talking about obsessions to a minimum, and that's worked too.


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09 Jun 2012, 8:39 am

I took a test and it put me borderline thus NT friends have changed me socially but the AS in me lives.


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Moondust
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09 Jun 2012, 4:07 pm

I find it hard to believe that someone can have an "almost" ("borderline") different-from-the-majority neurological structure, but who knows.

As to your brain's structure having changed over the years, I find it even harder to believe possible.

It reminds me of back when homosexuality was in the DSM as an illness, some homosexuals managed to adjust to a heterosexual life in some sort of way, and believed themselves cured.



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09 Jun 2012, 4:17 pm

I think I got worse with age. I gave up on acquiring better social skills and I got more set in my ways.



bnky
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09 Jun 2012, 4:52 pm

PTSmorrow wrote:
I'm 53 and no, there was no lessening in symptoms, just the opposite -- well, kind of. I'm simply no longer wasting time with things i don't really want. When i was in my twenties it was more difficult for me to cut off people who were bothering me or say NO to an invitation without further discussion.

Another important point seems to be that there is much more awareness of AS in public now. Stimming, for instance, could easily be misunderstood if one did it at the grocery store. Meanwhile quirky behavior seems more acceptable. All in all, i can live much better with my symptoms since there's no more trying to influence me in some way.

Identify myself with all of this, except that I'm 46.



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09 Jun 2012, 6:33 pm

I can see now that although I have some traits similar to AS (socially awkward, difficulty with faces, lack of physical grace, perseveration), I am nowhere nearly as affected as many other are. I've made it a point to learn social skills, and it's an effort to use them, but I'm pretty mainstream.

Thanks for sharing, everybody.



Kinme
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09 Jun 2012, 6:41 pm

Definitely. I couldn't figure out social cues as well; I've memorized how I should act in certain situations. I know more of how to behave and what is appropriate (not always). I can also pick-up on when people are annoyed with me continually talking (not ALWAYS, but I do try and am usually right).



Atomsk
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09 Jun 2012, 6:47 pm

My autism has gotten better with age, in some respects. For example, my compulsive movements/involuntary movements, tics, and OCD-like stuff has decreased with age, even though it is all still present. I've become more capable of handling myself in social situations - but it is very tiring - I get burnt out easily from social situations. Due to having language as a special interest, and having taken many linguistics classes and language classes and so on, I do pretty well with understanding idiomatic expressions and all that, compared to how I used to do. It's not natural to me though, still. Often I just recognize something as an idiom, but have no idea what it means still - which is an improvement from assuming it is a literal saying and being puzzled.

In other areas it has gotten worse or stayed the same - for example, I still hate eye contact, don't do it naturally (usually just don't do it), etc. I am horrible at reading body language still, and the same with facial expressions. I honestly have no idea what most of them mean - I took some facial expression recognition test and got only 4 right - for most of the multiple choice questions, I thought none of the options fit the face.

I also still do loads of repetitive things, like motions, certain routines that revolve around trigger events (like packing up my music gear). I also have EXTREME special interest involvement. What I mean is that my life literally revolves around my special interests. There isn't much in my life that doesn't involve them, and if something doesn't involve them I get bored very very fast.



Mdyar
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09 Jun 2012, 10:22 pm

Moondust wrote:
I find it hard to believe that someone can have an "almost" ("borderline") different-from-the-majority neurological structure, but who knows.

As to your brain's structure having changed over the years, I find it even harder to believe possible.

It reminds me of back when homosexuality was in the DSM as an illness, some homosexuals managed to adjust to a heterosexual life in some sort of way, and believed themselves cured.


The Broader Autism Phenotypes are sub clinical. E.g., Parents of autistic children can have it all, but are able to socially cope and work, but have trouble - it's there but undiagnosable.

That being the case, this would move further away toward neurotypicality, and conversely; to the direction of Autism.

I had trouble with this idea myself, but I found a few papers that highlighted this with good anecdotal evidence.

As far as "getting better" I'd surmise it centers around interest, exposure and lightness of symptoms. If you are in NT land 24/7, and you have an interest in it; maybe out of sheer curiosity, one can watch it and learn about it. For me, say at a group picnic; the mutual bonding that people do really is not needed on my end. I eat, maybe throw a base ball around, and find somone to talk to about something. It can be a theatrical spectacle, depending on how you look at it.

But, I couldn't do this at 21.