Those we care for at times often hurt us the most!

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Anger often I feel is the frustrations of life, of not feeling heard, the frustration of some not understanding differences, we find hard to express, discuss... often because of lack of response of negative or no reply. Families often intentional or not can cause so much damage, children are given to us to help us grow, not to offload on.. the mental torture of words I had to suffer to believe, if only people took the time to listen and at least tried to understand individual difference, as not wanting to hear, listen harms.

I am sorry that you have been hurt by those you care for.
I agree with you on the statement that children should be cared for and not "unloaded" on.
May you find the love and peace that you need to heal.

WerewolfPoet" thank you, sadly far to many children are treated unnecessary wrongly, which impacts society long term...

"i_wanna_blue" when we grow up in a negative environment, long term those negative feelings have to impact us and then its so much harder to see the positives...

I often feel many label children before they have had time to grow, instead of embracing the indivdiual and encouraging them, wanting to fix them to fit a system that may never work for them. Every child is different and should be allowed to be so, I so hate it when it can seem like a child is to blame, the difficult one. I feel often the least understood and frustrated at not feeling heard!

My mother was always passed over by her parents in favor of her sister. My mother had no dowry, her sister got all the dowry available. So my mother married a "defective" man (AS). All this was kept a secret and never talked about in the extended family. My mother gave birth to 3 children, one of them "defective" like her husband (me). If she had acknowledged that I had a problem, wasn't normal, all the dirty secrets in the extended family would've come out to the light, it would've been a major catastrophe encompassing 3 generations. She feared immensely that her family of origin would abandon her for exposing the secrets. So she took the only alternative path - denial. She raised me to believe (and convinced everyone else in the extended family) that I was perfectly normal, just too selfish to care for others and therefore presented all the socially unfit behaviors and was awkward when helping with housechores (fine motor skills). I don't have any contact with any family because of this, and I'm all alone since my mother died a couple years ago.

However, if anyone in the family had truly listened, the result would've been exactly the same. Even if people understand you meant well, they don't enjoy you, have difficulty with you, and therefore don't want you near. Let alone people who are not family and are supposed to choose friends according to how pleasurable they are.