Socially awkward NTs

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Do you know any NTs who are very socially awkward and have been isolated all their life? Who spent all day every day on their own as a child, spent hours and hours in their room just on their own?

Ted Bundy

People in that position who find this site tend to self-diagnose and assume they have Asperger's. And maybe they do.

Those that don't come across this site or research it assume that all of their ills come from childhood trauma.

It's possible some people here who think they have AS are really socially maladjusted NTs. It's also possible a lot of aspies are walking around assuming their out-of-step nature is due to something else, unable or unwilling or unaware of Asperger's.

Hmm, I once knew an NT guy who is as socially awkward as me, but years later, another NT told me that he joined a club, made new friends there and "grew out of his social awkwardness".

It can only take one committed friend to "grow out of it". At least, as long as the friend's good intentions last. You'd expect a decade or two from a good one and that's enough for some of us.

Know of a few personally (I don't actually know them, but I know of them); extended family and neighbors.

You then have stuff like the personality disorders; a good portion of them usually equate to social isolation and odd behavior. Anxiety and mood disorders can cause social isolation too (some of these aren't probably seen as "NT" though).

double post...please delete.

Last edited by outofplace on 30 Aug 2012, 3:41 am, edited 1 time in total.

Well, it depends on what you mean by neurotypical. If you see all people who do not have a form of autism as neurotypical then yes, they do exist. However, I think you will find that it is far more rare to find someone who does not have some sort of psychological or neurological difference who lives that way. I think it could happen though as a result of an abusive childhood or one in which the person grew up in an isolated place with little outside human contact.

I've never known any NTs that were very socially awkward. I've known a couple loners. I did have a friend that was a bit socially awkward but he didnt measure up to my socially awkwardness.

My first ex was socially ret*d and he may have had aspie traits. He did score in between on the RDOS test. He had friends but he also had troubles fitting in growing up. His whole family rejected him and didn't want him. All he had were his parents that let him in their lives because he is their son/step son. He had a step father. His real father was dead. He even said he spent lot of time in his room growing up because his parents didn't spend any time with him nor played with him so he kept himself busy.

If autism is a spectrum, there will be people who are near being so but not diagnosable, and those whose problems don't have such an impact on their lives won't seek a diagnosis, so there's plenty of NT's who are socially awkward. There's also plenty of causes of being socially awkward; self consciousness or low self esteem, being the victim of bullying, neglect as a child, bad experiences with social interaction etc. It's not exclusively an AS trait.

Yes, my brother. He works full time, and goes out and socialises on Friday nights, but otherwise when he's not at work or at the pub, he just sits about in his room and don't see anybody at all, and if somebody does knock for him, he'd make any excuse he could not to go out. I do know that there are NTs out there who also like time to themselves sometimes, and to be fair my brother does work full time all week, so maybe that might be the reason linked to why he doesn't always feel like going out over the week-end (except for Friday nights). But not every single NT enjoys socialising 24/7. That is just a stereotype, just because an NT likes to have week-ends to himself, doesn't mean you've got to throw an AS diagnosis at him.