Do you follow rules?

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I'm curious how many people read the forum rules before posting in here, since it explicitly states that you MUST read before posting.



I did, even though I've joined many forums and read many forum rules, and even created and modded forums, and wrote rules myself, so I know they're always the same.

But I read it anyway because of my irrepressible need to respect rules. Partly out of fear of doing something wrong and standing out because of it, and partly because I believe rules are of paramount importance to maintain peace and harmony in the world, and for any group or organisation to run most efficiency in order that everyone achieves their goals.

And a little bit because I can't rule out the possibility that there might be something new in there for me to learn.

Would like to hear other people's thoughts on this.

I've been on many forums and know the general gist of forum rules is "Don't be an ***hole", although funnily enough I had just skimmed through that post before seeing this one immediately after.

I've never read rules on any forum, ever.

There seems to largely be two camps of members here. Those that read the site rules when they join and those that don't ever read them. When we (moderators) send warnings to members they sometimes claim to be ignorant of the specific rule they have broken. Sometimes members just don't care about breaking the rules... and then they get banned. It is strongly advisable for all members to read the site rules and terms of service rather than find themselves receiving a warning or temporary suspension, or finding themselves instantly banned for posting something in serious contravention of the rules.

Last edited by TallyMan on 08 Sep 2012, 6:38 am, edited 1 time in total.

most sentences are ambiguous to me, so i do not bother to read rules. i have learned with time (to a reasonable degree) what people are offended by. i refer to my frame of historic reference to guide my behaviour.

even the sentence "do you follow the rules" can be taken many ways. it is only "experience" that allows me to choose the correct meaning. when i was young, i had no idea which version was correct.
eg: "do you follow the rules" can be understood as
1. do you "understand" the rules (as in "do you follow me?")
2. do the rules come before me (which means are the "rules" more important than me) ?
3. do you "obey" the rules (as in "follow" a course that they chart) (still ambiguous to a degree)......etc etc etc... i must stop here because i am about to cross the threshold of irrelevance.

so i do not "obey" the rules by consciously choosing how to act based upon them, but i do "follow" the rules as a by-product of my (limited) experience of how to behave so as not to elicit hostility.

I remember when I first joined here in 2006 I did. Every forum has different rules but I know the obvious ones like no attacks, no spam, no trolling. Most forums have those rules, even if they are not listed because they will ban you for it even without warning.

Also the rules can be interpreted differently so the rules become vague. All you can do is learn from experience and from you mistakes and don't do that again whatever you did because now you know it falls under the rules. But for me, I only know that rule, I don't know of anything else that would be considered breaking that rule. I even had that problem as a kid too so I was always breaking the rules according to my report cards. I would also think it only applied in that situation only so I was following the rules but due to a different understanding I had, I was breaking them to someone else's view.

Also don't be an a**hole, that is very vague because define a**hole. You can be one because someone didn't like your opinion or like what you had to say. You can be one because you said something wrong and didn't even know it. You can be an a**hole based on your views you have on life because they are so closed minded and judgmental so would that mean you can't express those opinions? Anyone can think of you as an a**hole for any reason.

It's true what you guys are saying about how rules can be vague. I was recently told off during a job internship for not following a particular instruction but I was following it to my best interpretation so I was really gutted by the accusation.

But my main reason for starting this thread was I wanted to know if people heeded the thread that said, "You must read this before posting." I think that is a very clear rule/instruction that is hard to misunderstand.

I just want to find out if my need to follow instructions/rules is something unusual and whether it's an ASD thing.

Some people who never read the site rules assume they have "freedom of speech" to say anything. That does not apply to a privately owned forum such as this where the site owner has made the site rules. Members can chose to either follow those site rules or not to post here. So for example it isn't acceptable for someone to express homophobic or racist views but they are allowed to express anti-religious (or anti-atheist) views. One of the key site rules is that it is acceptable to debate and criticise opinions but not the poster expressing those views. There are also a few other things expressly forbidden within the site rules such as not cross-posting (something I often have to remind newbies who haven't read the site rules not to do - they tend to get annoyed when I delete their duplicate threads, but it is their own fault for not reading the rules). While the site rules are largely common sense and good etiquette there are a few things in there that are maybe less obvious e.g. it is forbidden to make posts about excretory functions or sexual fetishes.

I follow the rules here, because this is one of the only two supports that I have. My membership here is important to me. I can't really count on my family and my local mental health office won't take me, because they think I'm doing too well to qualify for their services. All I have are WP and my non WP friends. I might also seem that I'm a stickler for rules without trying to be. I'm a sweet and sensitive person, so I treat people the way I'd like to be treated.

Yeah true but I was thinking more about views people have about life like how people should live, how people on social security should live, people on welfare and what things they are allowed to have or how parents should be god and perfect and some people express their high horse opinions and holier than thou views about life such as in parenting or unemployment. People may read those and think of them as jerks because of their ignorance or absurd views. Someone once said at Babycenter that someone should go to school full time and work full time at night so she stay off GA and the person she said to too had a family so I was hoping I misunderstood what she wrote. Then someone told me through PM that I didn't read it wrong and some people think spending time with your family is a luxury. I also wondered how the heck is that person supposed to sleep then if they work and go to school full time? Would that view be allowed here if someone expressed it?

I don't honestly know without seeing the posts and inferring what was happening. People have been banned from here for repeatedly browbeating members who are on welfare. It depends if someone is expressing an opinion or trying to belittle other members. It also depends on whether comments are one-off or repeated. Not all situations are black and white to moderate; they never can be, so I understand why you would also have problems sometimes.

I think some people read the rules and then forget them and I think others read them and then do not see how they apply in a particular situation. Then there are some rules that are vague, and others--like rules against cross-posting--that are meaningless to a person who doesn't know what "cross-posting" is so they are unaware that they are violating a rule when they do it.

I myself sometimes have difficulty following rules that seem inconsistent to me. I think it is because I tend to be a gestalt thinker, so when I read a rule that forbids anti-gay or racist posts, I don't remember that is what it said. My mind remembers something more general about respecting individuals and no hate language. So then when I see blatantly disrespectful views posted about religion, for example, (which I categorize internally in the same manner as race, gender identity, sexual orientation, etc) my "broken rule" siren starts to blare and I feel that foul play has occurred. Then when it is pointed out that it is not against the rules, it still doesn't sit right because of the inconsistency in philosophy, or my perception that it isn't consistent.

Then I realize this is a private forum and the owner is allowed to make whatever rules he or she would like. I feel that personal values and beliefs are reflected in the rules and I would have to say I am in not in agreement with some of them, but the bottom line is, if I want to post here, I need to abide by the rules, even the ones I don't like.

From what I've seen on this forum over the years I'd say that rules are not generally treated by Aspies in exactly the same way as NTs. Aspies tend to fall into two camp. One set is rigid and follow rules and pick others out who are seemingly breaking the rules. Then there is the other camp of Aspies who don't believe in any rules unless they agree with them. I'm afraid I belong to the latter camp and question all rules; nothing is sacred to me. I just happen to agree with the WP site rules - that is probably one reason I got conscripted to be a moderator!

Generally in life I follow most social-norm type rules and the rules of law, but it doesn't stop me from questioning all of them and breaking a few that I don't accept. However, any rule breaking means one must be prepared to face whatever consequences there are for breaking those rules.

I think I belong to both camps. I'm a stickler for rules usually because they make sense in most situations, and I get upset when people don't follow them.

But when there are rules that are illogical or unfair, I would also get upset and question them, and won't follow them as long as they don't make me stand out too much or get me into real trouble.

I try to, but some of the members are overwhelming and I feel like I have to defend myself. The story of my life is always getting picked on instead of discussing things like adults. I'm one to not be pushed around.

The rules actually seem logical and sensible to me in this respect and I don't see them as inconsistent. The specific rule is:



This makes perfect sense to me. Attacking religious, political or philosophical beliefs cannot be treated as being against the rules or the rule would be unenforceable. If the religion/politics/philosophy of group 'A' are at odds with those of group 'B' and each attacks the others beliefs or opinions which group is breaking the rules? The only solution would be to prohibit all religious, political or philosophical debate! Similarly all disagreements or differences of opinion between all posters would have to be prohibited! In consequence members would only be allowed to agree with each other - WP would have to be renamed Stepford Planet.