WHAT?!?!
blackcat
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Joined: 16 Nov 2006
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,142
Location: 10 miles south of sanity.
i confided my worries of possibly being AS/HFA to a councler and she said that while i DO have a lot of paqular traits and mannorizms that i COULDNT POSSIBLY be on the spectrem because i emphasize far too well when i reconize the signals(of WHAT, i dont know). it must be something else.is this true? i'm kicked out because i am not lacking in empathy?!even with all the other issues?!?! IS SHE CORRECT? have i really just lost the only logical explanation for all of my differences???!i'm alone AGAIN?! !!
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I think I know. I don't think I know. I don't think I think I know. I don't think I think.
Is your counselor a specialist in AS?
I also doubted my own aspieness because ,even as a child,I responded to others suffering....a child crying or being teased,an animals suffering.What I couldnt do,is "think/feel" how my actions effected my peers or family.I only seemed to have empathy to the obvious suffering of smaller things.I would
rescue bugs from drowning in the pool but didnt feel comfortable hugging a peer or mom when they were destressed,because their distress either didnt make sense to me or I didnt know how.
I still have more "feeling" for my disabled clients then I do for my own family.I "feel" myself in their position and think it would cause me distress,so I try and stop their suffering because it hurts me.I think there are many forms of "empathy" and some of them can be learned through observation and logic.
How many times have you seen someone crying(in reali life or TV)and then seen someone hugging them and saying....whatever.After awhile,you can learn to do the same.I dont think that is the same thing as automatic "reflex" to comfort.
I dont know you or your counselor but I do think before you come to a conclussion,you should get a referral to a "specialist".
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Black Cat,
Read the definitions carefully, etc... Look at the basis for everything.... I have checked with others!.... The idea isn't lack of empathy really, but not showing it at a level they feel appropriate.
As for understanding the signals? That will probably be less obvious in females, but I doubt she is really in a position to make such an assessment anyway.
As for emphasizing, I do ALSO! Again, that is just a possible symptom. There are other possible symptoms that basically require things like emphasis.
Besides, if it was THAT easy to determine if someone had autism or AS, they wouldn't be having such a hard time doing so.
I saw no such thing for aspergers, but for AUTISM:
See all the "MAY"s, and "SOME"s? It IS interesting what it says about subtle inflections, etc... I'm going to have to listen more closely!

Steve
blackcat
Veteran

Joined: 16 Nov 2006
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,142
Location: 10 miles south of sanity.
I also doubted my own aspieness because ,even as a child,I responded to others suffering....a child crying or being teased,an animals suffering.What I couldnt do,is "think/feel" how my actions effected my peers or family.I only seemed to have empathy to the obvious suffering of smaller things.I would
rescue bugs from drowning in the pool but didnt feel comfortable hugging a peer or mom when they were destressed,because their distress either didnt make sense to me or I didnt know how.
I still have more "feeling" for my disabled clients then I do for my own family.I "feel" myself in their position and think it would cause me distress,so I try and stop their suffering because it hurts me.I think there are many forms of "empathy" and some of them can be learned through observation and logic.
How many times have you seen someone crying(in reali life or TV)and then seen someone hugging them and saying....whatever.After awhile,you can learn to do the same.I dont think that is the same thing as automatic "reflex" to comfort.
I dont know you or your counselor but I do think before you come to a conclussion,you should get a referral to a "specialist".
nah, just a shcool counselor(thanks for the correct spelling btw!)
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I think I know. I don't think I know. I don't think I think I know. I don't think I think.
Please see this thread:
http://asdgestalt.com/viewtopic.php?t=748
I've just started it not too long ago, but it may start showing that how many "professionals" really don't know what they're talking about.
Don't worry, cat. You're ASD. Only listen to those people who have enough actual experience to back up what they're saying.
And trust me, this sorta thing happens ALL THE TIME unfortunately.

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My partner's autism science blog, Cortical Chauvinism - http://corticalchauvinism.wordpress.com/
Having a lack of empathy is another one of the autism myths - just like saying most with autism are ret*d, have no sense of humor, ect. Another thing too someone mentioned on the autism hub is how many think of autism (and the spectrum) as a childhood condition and that many professions get stuck in that thinking. That causes alot of them to read up on the ASDs and look at the criteria and not be able to take into consideration that many people learn skills and so don't show the same level of concrete thinking and literalness or inability to read body language that kids do. So they will say you have too much empathy, or are too insightful or understand humor and therefore can't be on the spectrum.
Lynn
A friend of mine gave me the analogy of autism as a computer that works very well, but the printer is broken, meaning that an autistic person's brain works just fine, but he or she has a difficult time showing what he or she is thinking. An example would be with empathy. Many people with AS have empathy, but they are usually not able to show it so that the other person knows they have empathy. It might come across as something else.
Let me illustrate here (and please do not flame me for using this example. It happened to someone I know IRL). This whole discussion takes place after a group discussion on depression and suicide.
Aspie: Suicide isn't logical... I mean, why would you want to take something you can never get back?
Person (obviously very upset): You don't know that for sure. Some people are depressed and suicide seems like the only option for them. Don't criticize because you don't know what it's like!
Aspie: ... it just doesn't make sense.
Person (probably yelling): Well, you could try having a little more feeling! You ought to think about how other people feel or you shouldn't say anything at all if you don't.
(Aspie walks away being puzzled over the other person's reaction. Other person is very mad that aspie does not seem to have any empathy.)
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