Help.

Post Reply New Topic

How do I regulate the amount I talk?

When I am in social gatherings, with people I don't know, or at places like University, I barely talk. But then, with people I know, such as friends or my support worker/mental health team, I talk way too much: it's like "download all information now".

How do I talk less to these people? How do I stop the huge amount of information waiting to explode into their faces?

Seriously I need help in this because I embarrass myself sometimes - last night I spent ages rambling about drugs that act on the kidneys, kidney diseases and how the kidneys work, to my friend on the phone.

I just can't stop the speech coming out of my mouth with these people, especially if they mention something to do with pharmacology or medicine.

I try to match volume and depth with what they are saying. If their comment is two sentences long, I strive to limit my comment to no more than three sentences

. . . unless, of course, they ask a question requesting a data dump (occasional but rare occurrence)

I always keep in mind that people like to talk about themselves, so often limit my side of the conversation to questions and/or comments geared to keeping them talking as long as they wish.

_________________
If it don't come easy . . . .
. . . .hack it until it works right

Aspie score: 142/200 NT score: 64/200
AQ Score: 42
BAP: 109 aloof, 94 rigid and 85 pragmatic

I have found that 99% of the time, a roughly 20 second time limit seems to be about right. the difficult thing for me though is that I have to be truthful, and to me that means stating all exceptions. For example, the other day I was talking about how long it has been since I drank alcohol. Now, I quit drinking 4 years ago, but I had 1 drink roughly 18 months ago. So, instead of saying I haven't drank in 4 years, I said I haven't drank in 4 years with the exception of being talked into taking one drink by an alcoholic friend when I was upset because I felt I was about to get fired. The normal thing to say would be that I haven't drank in 4 years. It gives the pertinent information regarding the subject. however, it would eat at me that I hadn't been 100% truthful, even though the other parties would not have given a damn about the minor exception.