"What's an Aspie?" -you explain - "I think I

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Today while eating lunch some people were asking me questions about an interest and how I got to know so much about it, which is my personal cue to propagate the message of neurodiversity. Inevitably there will be a person or 2 that says "but you seem to do okay, I mean you're communicating with us fine". I explain about growing up mostly mainstreamed and inform them of differences they don't see outwardly - the sensories and difficulties with multiple conversations. One guy says "yeah I do that, but you know? Women can keep track of 10 conversations at once and men can't do that" - this particular guy I sense is not a full NT anyhow, but it strikes me as amusing when people seem to be looking for that next bandwagon to jump on, only to have the smart ones look it up and want to jump back off again, quick.

Are you like the Pied Piper of autism in your milieu? Has anyone ever approached you after outing yourself and seriously considered the possibility that they also have it and you've been able to guide them?

The next time someone comments on how "well you're communicating" with them or something else to the effect of not being socially impaired, perhaps try countering that other people seem to think otherwise, with perhaps an example of a situation where you "screwed up" or were treated less than respectfully?

Usual easy explanation is 'Practice makes perfect'.

Social interaction being more difficult is a very relative concept. To the neurotypical it's as simple as walking, while to the aspie it's more like learning to ride a bike or drive a car (or sometimes feels more like flying a space shuttle). The latter has to read signs and make the right turns, has more trouble changing directions or taking the shortest route... stuff like that.

I just call it Social Emulation, because sometimes it just boils down to 'Faking it'.

my problems with asperger's are far more severe than having a conversation. i can easily distinguish myself from others, and I wouldn't ever think of others as more AS or more NT, grading them that way, I don't think that Asperger's is a widespread syndrome. The line between me and others are very obvious, and I can demonstrate that to whoever ask.

^ That's because you are at a particular place on the spectrum from pure NT to pure AS. It does not change, or changes very slowly at the most.

Suppose, if 0 is pure NT and 100 is pure AS, you are at, say, 60. Almost everyone around you is in the 0-10 range. That means you are trying to bridge a 50-60 point gap, so the line between yourself and others is very clear.

Try talking to someone closer to you on this scale, and the "line" you speak of may get blurred.

Can you grade all living people on a scale relative to Asperger's syndrome? What are the factors deciding this? I would think myself that I am someone with a pure form of Asperger's syndrome, that others may have variants of personalities and deficits, as all have, but not in the same pattern as a syndrome or a development disorder. Isn't the point with Asperger's that it is neurological, not a variant of personality? Is it right to categorize diversities in people as neurological deficits in the same pattern as Asperger's syndrome

I'm sorry if this is unclear, what I mean is, can you elaborate? You didn't do that

I agree very much with this statement. I have learned to mimic social interactions to get by and avoid the aspie awkwardness of social interactions. I have embarrassed myself plenty of times, and still do on occasions, but practicing small social steps has been very helpful to me. Sometimes, I can remind myself to keep the answer short and sweet, which is what most people want. In some cases though, especially if they are asking about technical info, the question can trigger an avalanche of technical jargon and I don't realize that I am burying them with an overload of information. I have slowly learned to over simplify such information and provide them with the cliff notes version, which has worked very well. However, it still goes completely against the grain of what I would like to say.

Unless I am having a great deal of difficulty, I do not ever mention that I think I'm autistic. I do not think it is necessary or helpful. And if people tell me that I'm communicating well or something like that, I just take it. I don't see why I'd try to prove to them that I'm not actually as good at something as they think I am.

Lucky you.
What joy it must be to actually have people show an interest in something you know about, as opposed to expressly forbidding you to ever talk about it.


I basically accepted long ago that nothing I find interesting will ever be anything anyone wants to hear. The upside of this is that all I need to do in order to troll people in meatspace... is to start talking about what I really want to talk about.


(If you're worried, I have no reason to do that here. You're all like family to me... in a sense.)

A lot of personality is neurological, actually. It's a mix of hard-wired and learned characteristics. The hard-wired aspects are neurologically based. For example, see this study that found that Big Five personality traits correlated with brain structure.

Oh, and this study suggests that autistic traits are a form of personality variation.