Anyone else have problems making decisions?

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I have problems making decisions, only unfortunately this even includes the simplest of things...

I'm unemployed so a typical day consists of housework, going to the shop and walking - thrilling stuff, I know - despite this limited choice of activity I still get my head all muddled-up trying to decide what to do. My train of thought goes something along the lines of;
I could go to X shop then take X route for a walk...but I need a shower and don't want people in the shop to think I'm untidy...I should shower beforehand...but then I'd need another shower after a walk and I'd have to wash my hair twice in one day...I could go for a walk first then shop after a shower...but then it'd be too late to get to the shop...and there's not enough time between washing my hair then and the next day....I could not go to the shop...but I need X item...but I can get X item from Y store if I go Y walking route...etc. etc. etc.

The simplest thing turns into this huge complex internal dialogue that can carry on for hours, can include how a simple task may impact on plans days in advance, and that has me so confused I don't know what to do. I end-up not actually doing anything as I spend so much time deciding that times runs out, OR if I do decide on a final plan I find myself getting flustered as I realise that actually another plan would have worked out better - worse still if I decide I'm not going to go somewhere, I will sit thinking 'if I leave now I could still go'...'there's still time to go'... I get so anxious about not going or the idea that I might have to make a frantic attempt to get to somewhere on time that I get myself stressed.

Right now I'm having problems sleeping - I find it hard to stop what I'm doing and say 'it's now time for bed' so I often don't go to bed until really late, then I end-up sleeping half the day so I get nothing done and the above mentioned dilemma gets even more difficult - it's 9am and I'm trying to decide whether to go to bed or not, if I go to bed I might over-sleep so sleep all day again and not feel tired at a reasonable time again, but if I try to stay up I'll fall asleep half way through the day...AGAIN I can't make a firm decision.

It's really hard to explain, but this problem causes me big problems in terms of getting out of the house and anxiety.
Anyone else have any idea what I'm talking about, have anything similar, and know what to do about it?

I make decisions just fine. The problem is I make bad decisions.

I'm the same. I make my own decisions but I make mistakes all the time and I do not learn from making the bad decision. I seem to keep making the bad decision over and over again, such as making friends for instance. I have no idea whos a bad person or a good person and now even though I'm nearly 40 my Mum, Dad, sister and phycologist have taken over the decision for me to see if these new people I make friends with are good friends or bad friends.

<--- King of Bad Decisions. (Even wrote a song about it once).

I have exactly the same issue, pretty much just like you described. I find it's not as bad with things that are familiar and routine, or where the course of action to take is really obvious; it's worst when the choice is completely arbitrary and there's no particular reason to choose one thing over another, or when I don't feel like I know what all the reasonable options are yet.

I suspect that this difficulty making arbitrary choices may explain a lot of other traits of autism spectrum disorders, though I'm just speculating about that. Sticking to routines eliminates indecision about how to do things each time, for example. It basically takes more effort and more time to act whenever there's a lot of uncertainty or ambiguity, which causes problems functioning in such situations and behaviours that tend to avoid them.

I try to focus on the vital things first, and take them one at a time. Usually I'll spread the stressful things out over a few days if I can, rather than trying to deal with them all at once. If there's something new I want to try, I'll try to do it when I don't have anything else unusual going on. I also try to choose what major things I need to do well in advance, and leave a lot of time for them, partly to lessen the pressure and partly to allow time for indecision or to get myself motivated.

Essentially, limit how many things you need to choose at once, and leave lots of time to make the choices. And try to limit the amount of stress you're under as well; some stress is unavoidable, but you don't need to stress about everything at once. And finally, don't be too hard on yourself if you don't get to everything you'd planned on -- try to get the vital things done, but after that if you miss something it's not the end of the world, and you can always try again later.

Hopefully someone else will have some better ideas...

Unfortunately I don't know what to do about your problem. But I have exactly the same problem. I can understand what you described. I have lived like that for all my adult life.

I have problems with everyday small decisions in exactly the same way as you described, such as whether to have coffee, tea or wine and then whether to do washing before that etc. I tend to think too much about little things, get overwhelmed by them and get badly stressed. I often keep thinking until I have no choice (e.g. until past the date by which I have to apply for something).

However, it's been affecting my life even worse, particularly with my career choices etc. I couldn't make up my mind on what to study. I did decide in the end, but I couldn't help thinking I made a bad choice and kept wondering if I should change to something else. I've been doing that pretty much up until now and am still feeling confused. I am an intelligent person and do well academically, but always have a hard time finding a job. I do have a job, but I'm an underachiever so far. I guess it's due to this decision problem + an personal interaction problem.

Bloodheart, I know what you mean, but I think I'm pretty good at making decisions on the whole. Yes, I analyse things a lot as well, but I also consider what's important and what's not (priorities) and accept that it's OK to make a sub-optimal decision for unimportant things.

So, with your walking and shopping example, I might go through a similar dialog and IMO there's nothing wrong with it But then I would say "OK, so what do I actually need to do today?" If I need item X from the shop then I need to go the shop, but the walk is optional. So I'd leave the walk out to simplify things. Shower, then shop. If I still had time after that, then I'd consider the walk separately.

Could it also be that you just have too much time to make decisions? Do you find you do it better when there's actually some time limit? If you had to go to work during the day you'd probably get up, shower, go to work and go to the shop on your way back (if it was still open). So much simpler, right?

As for going to bed - yes, I have that problem. I've never stayed up until 9 am, but 2-3 am - sure. I do work, but I have flexible hours, so there's just no compelling reason to go to sleep at any particular time - no firm deadline. I know I can always stay up a bit later and go to bed a bit later. It's good that I can, but it's not good that I do.

One time I spent half a day trying to figure out in what order I should run my errands after work. I was thinking of which routes I should take depending on which place I went to first. Trying to figure out which way wouldn't require me to backtrack and make me drive more. I suddenly realized how much thought I was putting into something "sooo simple" and I couldn't help but laugh and say to myself. "And you still sometimes doubt you're an aspie?"

I'm really good at bad decisions, I have no problem making them if I'm the only one affected by the decision, but when other people are involved I don't want to make the wrong decision so I make the other person(s) deal with it.

i kinda do; the problem is that i dont feel like i chose to do "A", i choose to *not* do B, C, D, E, .... this makes the decision a lot harder.
i usually solve this by not thinking about it; i go the the store on autopilot, and allow myself to be surprised at what store i end up at (to use the grocery shopping example)

I definitely relate to your post. Particularly once I became a teenager and in college, I no longer had a set bedtime, I would stay up half the night and then lose the next day to sleep. Getting a set schedule actually does improve the performance of your body and mind, if you can manage to get things switched around for yourself. For instance, I had to begin shutting off my computer at night so that I wouldn't start browsing around the internet for hours.

I write down my schedule for the week on a paper on my desk with appointments and obligations for each day of the week. Some of them are reoccuring (rituals), so that I know what to expect (Taco Tuesday!) and some vary (although I try to schedule therapy wednesdays, etc. Because it helps me!) Some days I do not get the optional parts of my daily schedule done.

I also have realized that I do not do well in a hurry, so if I need to be somewhere, I need to get up two hours prior, in order to slowly awaken myself for the first hour, and then actually shower and eat and dress. If I am rushed, my anxiety goes thru the roof, and I end up feeling unpresentable and miss my appointment. Also a good dose of telling myself "No one will notice if you dont wash your hair bc you washed it yesterday" or "It doesn't matter if you go to the library first and the store second" over and over and over again until I just make a motion in a direction towards my activities sometimes helps

Sometimes when I am overwhelmed with decisions I end up doing nothing at all. When there is a situation where there are no clear deisions to be made, but I just don't know what to do about it, then also I do nothing at all.

I also have a difficult time making decisions. My mind goes blank. I cringe inside when my husband asks me what movie I want to see, or what I want to eat for dinner. I am very bad at deciding what I want, but I can usually decide what I do not want. That frustrates my husband and also makes me appear very negative. The funny thing is, this usually only happens when someone asks me...if I'm by myself, it's not nearly as difficult.